Does This Book Take on a More Negative Look of The Slave/Master Relationship or What?

Xavier7 Xavier7
The Claiming of Sleeping Beauty
Related to: 
This book has been commented on as traumatic, and I think that she's more of a victim of rape and mental abuse than anything. I'm sorry to post this, for anyone who doesn't want to read about it, but I've been a victim of rape and don't want this kind of thing sold, personally, or read. What do you think of it? I don't like that this kind of fantasy exists, and I don't understand it. I don't mean to bring it up, it's just if that's the kind of meaning it has, I don't think it should be sold on EdenFantasys.
02/03/2011
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clp clp
The Sleeping Beauty Trilogy is a fantasy world based on BDSM interests. This isn't about the modern slave-trafficking; the characters live in a highly fetishized, stylized realm of casual bondage, servitude and lotsa kings and queens and princesses. I've read the trilogy and loved them. It was actually quite empowering for me to read, as both a survivor and a submissive. Elements did confuse me, of course, and some pages took longer pauses to pick back up from others. Overall, though, this is not a book about rape or violence; it is entirely about willing submission. Plain and simple, as the many many reviewers and commenters said: if you don't have interest in BDSM, you won't enjoy or understand these books.

I'm sorry that, if when reading this, it triggered personally traumatic memories for you. I understand why you would feel defensive and want to shun it, but that is not what these books are about. The Sleeping Beauty trilogy is a staple of BDSM literature--as much as you do not appreciate them, there are many others that do.
02/03/2011
DeliciousSurprise DeliciousSurprise
Quote:
Originally posted by Xavier7
This book has been commented on as traumatic, and I think that she's more of a victim of rape and mental abuse than anything. I'm sorry to post this, for anyone who doesn't want to read about it, but I've been a victim of rape and ... More
I don't like reading books about right-wing politics. I don't like horror films where masked men kill unsuspecting innocents. I really don't like ugly shoes because they traumatize my eyes.

Should all of these things be banned? Should they not be sold?

Extreme examples, yes.


How about a better one: should they not sell bondage gear on EF? Should EF not sell handcuffs or rope or blindfolds, because those can be used in a sexual assault?

I'm sorry that you found this book traumatic, but it IS a valuable piece of literature. That's why we have reviews, after all; to warn readers of the content and what to expect from such writings.
02/03/2011
Xavier7 Xavier7
Quote:
Originally posted by clp
The Sleeping Beauty Trilogy is a fantasy world based on BDSM interests. This isn't about the modern slave-trafficking; the characters live in a highly fetishized, stylized realm of casual bondage, servitude and lotsa kings and queens and ... More
IS it willing submission, though?
02/04/2011
Xavier7 Xavier7
Quote:
Originally posted by DeliciousSurprise
I don't like reading books about right-wing politics. I don't like horror films where masked men kill unsuspecting innocents. I really don't like ugly shoes because they traumatize my eyes.

Should all of these things be banned? ... More
No, actually, I don't think they should sell that stuff and I don't know why people buy it at all, honestly.
02/04/2011
Angel deSanguine Angel deSanguine
Quote:
Originally posted by Xavier7
No, actually, I don't think they should sell that stuff and I don't know why people buy it at all, honestly.
Books about right wing politics? I don't get it either.

In all seriousness BDSM is an activity that occurs between two (or more) consenting adults. Any self respecting BDSM participant is going to get royally pissed if their choice of activity is called abuse because there is one key difference- consent. Consent changes everything.

As far as the book? The series is beautifully written and I enjoyed it. One must understand that fiction is just that- fiction. There are many things that people enjoy in fiction and fantasies that would either never be possible or they would never do. People should not be ashamed to express and enjoy things in a fictional setting.

If you are uncomfortable with BDSM and its undercurrents I do not understand why you would read a book so clearly about BDSM. I am not saying that you are not entitled to read whatever you please, I'm just saying that you (and everyone else, including myself) should be aware of the contents of your literature and know, at least somewhat, what to expect. For example I haven't read any but I am fully aware that if I read an Ann Coulter book I am going to rage for a week (at least). That isn't an emotion I enjoy so I simply don't read them. Choice is a beautiful thing that we all have the right to exercise. If you don't want to read about BDSM simply put, don't.
02/04/2011
Tori Rebel Tori Rebel
I don't think the book casts any negative light on BDSM culture or relationships, personally. It is first and foremost, a fictional, fantasy, erotic novel. Just a piece of literature, not an instructional guide as to how to harm people against their will, or hold them without consent. I personally have read the series and while I really like the BDSM aspects of them, and can appreciate all of the erotic aspects of the story being a switch myself, I didn't love them, simply because I felt that the way they were written made them drag on a little at times.

I have to agree with Angel and CLP in that if you are not interested in BDSM as a lifestyle or even a fantasy, it just may not resonate well for you personally. For those that live in a M/s relationship or participate in the BDSM lifestyle in any way whatsoever, the book is most likely better understood and received.

To each their own!
02/04/2011
Naughty Student Naughty Student
I have the Trilogy and love it.

These were the first erotic novels I ever read and they intruduced me to the knowledge about the world of BDSM although it is unrealisitic (no safe words, etc.) It's about submission and you get to go into the minds of the submissives, what their emotions are why they feel in such ways. It's absolutely interesting to read and it openned my eyes to different types of pleasures that are out there.

It is not about rape, as CLP points out, its mainly about sexual servitude. The prince's/esses are brought into a world of BDSM where they must obey each command of their master. They know they will never be hurt in a way that is dangerous for their lives. It isn't about rape but about the emotional and relational components of BDSM.

If you aren't too sure about it, then you should not get this book or any of the others.
02/04/2011
PussyGalore PussyGalore
If you don't get on with the idea of submission, then don't buy the books. They're poorly written,first of all, by someone who has an affinity for making up the details. Anne Rice is certainly not the authority on BDSM. For anyone getting into BDSM and for those who love erotica and respect the BDSM it's a good read. Obviously, I wouldn't recommend them to the local church pastor as a must-read but I would for my more kink-friendly friends.

You're asking for censorship of a perfectly legal expression of a perfectly legal lifestyle. You seem to have a problem with a few of the items sold on the internet that aren't driven towards a more vanilla line of thinking, and that's ok. I have a problem with how all of the realistic dildos have unrealistic ridges and veins. Tit-for-tat. You're right to not like it and not purchase it should not infringe on my right to purchase and use as I see fit.
02/04/2011
Xavier7 Xavier7
Quote:
Originally posted by Angel deSanguine
Books about right wing politics? I don't get it either.

In all seriousness BDSM is an activity that occurs between two (or more) consenting adults. Any self respecting BDSM participant is going to get royally pissed if their choice of ... More
I haven't read it, just about it. I don't like the idea of it, though. See, I've been raped and I just can't take the idea that anyone could still be into this kind of thing when they know what it's based off of. It's based off of rape. Or at least I think it is.

I think this is a healthy discussion and I really appreciate the feedback. You all have some wonderful opinions and I just want you all to know that I respect the way you feel.
02/04/2011
Xavier7 Xavier7
Quote:
Originally posted by PussyGalore
If you don't get on with the idea of submission, then don't buy the books. They're poorly written,first of all, by someone who has an affinity for making up the details. Anne Rice is certainly not the authority on BDSM. For anyone getting ... More
Really, parts of it should be legal, but others, no. I'm sure you've seen FetLife and some of the brutal pictures posted on there on people's profiles. A lot of it is just plain sick. But the way I see it, a lighter BDSM is just fine.
02/04/2011
Redboxbaby Redboxbaby
I read these books a LONG, LONG time ago (in the 80's). Personally, I found them a bit much for my liking then, but I am more mature now and have been thinking I might like to re-read them.

I can understand your feelings on this matter, based on your history you provided; however, there is a very slippery slope here when you talk about censorship and books being banned or removed from the shelves based on content. I am sorry you disapprove of this type of fantasy being sold. I am sure there are all kinds of other fantasies written about that are not my cup of tea; but I do not want them removed, I just choose not to read/buy them. Some people do not approve of any type of sexual items or porn (movies or magazine, even toys)being sold; should we stop offering it up for sale? There are tons of non-fiction books available at our local public libraries(this is where I checked these books out - I was 12 or 13yrs old) and documentary-type movies out there about serial killers/rapists/domest ic violence/gang-bangers( watch any A&E or Lifetime TV, lately?), do we ban all those as well?

One of my favorite quotes" "What is freedom of expression? Without the freedom to offend, it ceases to exist."— Salman Rushdie

I am a survivor of sexual and physical abuse; at no time am I going to let what someone else inflicted upon me, be grounds for censoring any type of speech, art, or anything else for that matter. What is right for one person may certainly not be right for another. We are not cookie dough waiting for the cookie cutter to mold us all into the perfect form. If we were all the same, liking the same stuff and disliking the same stuff, life would be utterly boring and IMO, it would not be worth living.

Benjamin Franklin once said, "If all printers were determined not to print anything till they were sure it would offend nobody, there would be very little printed."

*steps off soapbox*
02/04/2011
DeliciousSurprise DeliciousSurprise
Quote:
Originally posted by Xavier7
I haven't read it, just about it. I don't like the idea of it, though. See, I've been raped and I just can't take the idea that anyone could still be into this kind of thing when they know what it's based off of. It's based ... More
"if you take away the right to say 'fuck' you take away the right to say 'fuck the government'
-Lenny Bruce


So this week I got hit by a vehicle while walking on a sidewalk and it kind of screwed me up. Should you not be able to watch action movies with car chases and near misses? Every time I see a car backing up i flinch, should EF not sell movies with cars? You're making a lot of judgements about something you haven't even read.

Everyone has triggers and if we removed a book every time someone was bothered by the subject matter we'd be reading the alphabet over and over and over and spending a lot more time watching television because we'd have nothing to read.
02/05/2011
Angel deSanguine Angel deSanguine
Quote:
Originally posted by Xavier7
I haven't read it, just about it. I don't like the idea of it, though. See, I've been raped and I just can't take the idea that anyone could still be into this kind of thing when they know what it's based off of. It's based ... More
I have been raped as well, I raped and then two weeks later I was raped again by another man. He was my then-fiance's friend who was there to 'protect me' and help me feel safe. I very much understand extreme dislike for something because it is a trigger. It can take many years to get over a lot of them and you have to allow yourself time and understanding.

That being said, it is not the right choice to condemn a book, or those reading it, that you have not read and really know nothing about. Also, calling people sick for what you've seen on Fetlife is, bluntly put, unacceptable. There are quite a few heavy BDSM players on Edens, including myself, and that is an insult to them as well. I am not being rude, I am being blunt and firm when I say that ANY BDSM is just fine as long as those involved have discussed the acts and have given informed consent, it is not your place to say otherwise. It is not anyone's place to say otherwise except for the people immediately involved- the top(s)and the bottom(s) that will be participating. I understand that you do not understand BDSM because you are not a participant- and that is okay! That's the great thing about choice! Believe me when I say that no one involved in BDSM wants you to participate if you do not want to and therefore they do not expect you to know the ins and outs, the details. The only thing they expect is the same thing that they give to you- respect of their choices.

Please consider others feelings before you jump in and call them sick. There are things on Edens that people are involved in that isn't my cup of tea but respect and decorum should always take precedence- I'm sure there's some things I'm involved in that not everyone approves of or is interested in and I appreciate the respect that is extended towards me and my differences. After all, if we were all the same and enjoyed the same things, EF would be beyond boring- just a group of people sitting in a circle going 'uh huh, yep. Me too!' and it would have fizzled and died out a long time ago. I am glad that you feel safe enough to come here and participate, please do not forget why that is.
02/05/2011
BBW Talks Toys BBW Talks Toys
Quote:
Originally posted by Xavier7
I haven't read it, just about it. I don't like the idea of it, though. See, I've been raped and I just can't take the idea that anyone could still be into this kind of thing when they know what it's based off of. It's based ... More
I've been raped too, and I don't abide anyone making light of rape (i.e., the bill that had to be edited because of the terminology of "forcible rape"). HOWEVER, I also don't abide censorship. I read reviews on books to know if I would enjoy the subject matter. You also can't be a victim forever. At some point you have to claim yourself back as a survivor of such atrocities and go on with life. It's a defining moment in your life, not THE defining moment.

One thing I have learned here is that there is a difference between rape and rape-play (more accurately termed "ravishment"). Even if they're acting as though they're not consenting, they still are, or there would be fear, panic, PTSD, anxiety, depression that follows. I haven't read this series, but it seems fairly evident by the commentary here, that those things may not be the case.

BDSM is about much more than dominance and submission. It's about intimacy, it's about trust, it's about pleasure. Once the spankings or any other type of implement-play changes from painful-pleasure to simply pain, the dom/domme has violated the trust that the sub has entrusted to him/her. And ultimately, the sub is the one in control. They are the ones who determine how far a session goes, the dom/domme is giving the sub what he/she wants.

I allowed my husband (I've been married over 8 years) to tie me up last night. He's been wanting to for as long as we've been together (9 years) and I just let him last night. This is much more about trust and intimacy than anything.

You reference in another post, FetLife. The people who are the subject of those things WANT to be tied, and forced, and gagged, and spanked. The difference between this and abuse is that they WANT it, get off on it. Personally, stuff like that doesn't appeal to me but it doesn't mean that they shouldn't be allowed to partake. What they do has no bearing on my own sexuality.
02/05/2011
BBW Talks Toys BBW Talks Toys
Honestly, I've barely got a toe dipped into the world of BDSM. There's lots I don't know and lots I don't understand. So those are my observations of what I've encountered. If I'm wrong about any of it, I've yet to be schooled.
02/05/2011
Illusional Illusional
Like other women saying, I have been a rape victim a few times.
And sometimes I don't like what the books have to say, but they are out there and that's fine.

Cause, you know what? I have an affinity for older men and women scenarios and hentai, huge breasted purple hair elf chicks... some people find that odd and disturbing but if you don't like it, avoid it.
02/06/2011
Xavier7 Xavier7
Quote:
Originally posted by Redboxbaby
I read these books a LONG, LONG time ago (in the 80's). Personally, I found them a bit much for my liking then, but I am more mature now and have been thinking I might like to re-read them.

I can understand your feelings on this matter, ... More
I like what you said.
02/09/2011
Xavier7 Xavier7
Quote:
Originally posted by BBW Talks Toys
I've been raped too, and I don't abide anyone making light of rape (i.e., the bill that had to be edited because of the terminology of "forcible rape"). HOWEVER, I also don't abide censorship. I read reviews on books to know ... More
Most of them like it, but how do we know if they aren't coerced? We don't.

How can I survive when I have nightmares every night and am trying every day not to kill myself? Triggers shouldn't exist, and when they do, I realize that a lot of the world does not, and never will understand.

It's your choice if you want to be tied up.

But it wasn't mine. And I will never consent to that kind of thing when I know what it was based upon.

Also, I hope I didn't offend anyone. I'm sorry that I have. I feel a bit offended myself, but luckily not too much, because I know you all have a right to your opinions, even on a website that might moderate our comments or flag them.
02/09/2011
Angel deSanguine Angel deSanguine
Quote:
Originally posted by Xavier7
Most of them like it, but how do we know if they aren't coerced? We don't.

How can I survive when I have nightmares every night and am trying every day not to kill myself? Triggers shouldn't exist, and when they do, I realize that ... More
Xavier7, if you are having nightmares and suicidal thoughts please seek professional support! You deserve to take your life back and you can if you have the tools to do so. Please please contact RAINN via their website or via phone at 1.800.686.HOPE. RAINN does not have access to your phone number or name but they are excellent at lending an ear and helping you find resources locally to have local support. You deserve your life back, you are worth it, you can succeed.
02/09/2011
BBW Talks Toys BBW Talks Toys
Quote:
Originally posted by Xavier7
Most of them like it, but how do we know if they aren't coerced? We don't.

How can I survive when I have nightmares every night and am trying every day not to kill myself? Triggers shouldn't exist, and when they do, I realize that ... More
Please, please take this in the way I intend it, I'm by NO MEANS suggesting that you "suck it up and move on." That is NOT what I'm saying. Living with the aftermath of years of sexual abuse and then being raped, followed by serial one night stands before I met My Mr, and then still continuing to struggle, I KNOW that it can't be *snap* fixed. So I'm going to say something to you and I hope that you take it in the way it's intended.

"How can I survive when I have nightmares every night and am trying every day not to kill myself? Triggers shouldn't exist, and when they do, I realize that a lot of the world does not, and never will understand." If you are having nightly nightmares and feel suicidal, you need to seek professional help. You are not just suffering from depression but from PTSD and it is not something that can be overcome with time. Often times, if untreated, sufferers of PTSD will become more secluded and reclused and the fears will only get worse.

You have the power to stand up to your attacker. Maybe not to his face, but by getting the help you need. Healing from this takes away his power over you and allows you to fully enjoy life again.

I have a question for you. And this is not an attack, it's simply a question. Why do you look at things on here that offend you and then are upset that they don't offend others? If you are trying to avoid triggers, I would definitely recommend not scoping out the BDSM section and books. It seems like self-destructive behavior to me.

Again, much love and support to you. If you want to talk or anything, just send me a PM. I'm usually within arms reach of my computer and am always lurking. But please, go seek out a professional. They're equipped to help you transform from victim to survivor. And I know you can do it!
02/09/2011
SexyTabby SexyTabby
I have the trilogy and enjoyed them a lot. I see no reason anything in it should be banned. What one person finds acceptable and enjoyable another may find horrible. It's all about a personal choice and preference. If you aren't into it or if you have misgivings about it then you should find something else that would provide better results for you personally. It's not for us to say what's right and wrong in each others willing fantasies but reality isn't a book and is different for some who like different things. If you are struggling then I agree with the others you should seek appropriate help.
02/09/2011
Xavier7 Xavier7
Quote:
Originally posted by Angel deSanguine
Xavier7, if you are having nightmares and suicidal thoughts please seek professional support! You deserve to take your life back and you can if you have the tools to do so. Please please contact RAINN via their website or via phone at 1.800.686.HOPE. ... More
I've tried for years. Nothing works. Trust me. I've dealt with therapists for years, been sent twice to a mental institution and even been to juvie because the cops were beating the crap out of me for no reason other than that I wanted to kill myself, and I was defending myself because I thought they were going to rape me. Trust me, nothing helps. Nothing is going to help. All I can do is pretend it doesn't exist.
02/10/2011
Xavier7 Xavier7
Quote:
Originally posted by BBW Talks Toys
Please, please take this in the way I intend it, I'm by NO MEANS suggesting that you "suck it up and move on." That is NOT what I'm saying. Living with the aftermath of years of sexual abuse and then being raped, followed by ... More
I didn't look for it, I just came accross it. I tend to do that a lot. I try to ignore stuff, but I just don't like that it's on here, and honestly, I don't want it to trigger someone else the way it triggers me, so I ask questions...I like to question, I guess what you could say. But yeah, you're quite right. I am a self-destructive person. I always have been. I just don't know what to do with myself most days. I have no self esteem at all.
02/10/2011
Xavier7 Xavier7
By the way, thank you all for caring. It does mean a good deal..
02/10/2011
ZenaidaMacroura ZenaidaMacroura
Quote:
Originally posted by Xavier7
I didn't look for it, I just came accross it. I tend to do that a lot. I try to ignore stuff, but I just don't like that it's on here, and honestly, I don't want it to trigger someone else the way it triggers me, so I ask ... More
I know how you feel. I've never been raped, but I have other reasons for feeling pretty messed up. I've been fairly self-destructive for years. I have no self esteem. And believe me, I've contemplate suicide more than once. But I know that things do have the potential to get better, and that's basically what keeps me going. I'm glad you're still with us, and I hope you continue to fight those feelings. We you.
02/10/2011
Xavier7 Xavier7
Quote:
Originally posted by ZenaidaMacroura
I know how you feel. I've never been raped, but I have other reasons for feeling pretty messed up. I've been fairly self-destructive for years. I have no self esteem. And believe me, I've contemplate suicide more than once. But I know ... More
Well, thank you. I really appreciate it alot...And I keep coming back to this community because I feel loved here. This is truly a wonderful place...even to vent my sorrows...

You guys are truly wonderful. You certainly make me feel loved. (Oh wait. I'm a guy. I'm not supposed to admit to those feelings! Oh well.)
02/14/2011
Badass Badass
Quote:
Originally posted by clp
The Sleeping Beauty Trilogy is a fantasy world based on BDSM interests. This isn't about the modern slave-trafficking; the characters live in a highly fetishized, stylized realm of casual bondage, servitude and lotsa kings and queens and ... More
Wouldn't we much rather have someone reading these books than going out and getting a girl?
02/02/2012
CoffinGirl CoffinGirl
Quote:
Originally posted by Xavier7
This book has been commented on as traumatic, and I think that she's more of a victim of rape and mental abuse than anything. I'm sorry to post this, for anyone who doesn't want to read about it, but I've been a victim of rape and ... More
I'm sorry for what you personally have been through, but dont take it out on the book. I've been in your shoes, dont think I'm being insensitive. But this book is what its like to be a sex slave. BDSM is not a world for everyone, and you shouldnt blame a lifestyle for what one asshole did to you.
05/29/2012
Sangsara Sangsara
I loved it , because it takes place in a total fantasy world, it was easier for me to accept than it would if it was modern day. I mean the type of stuff that takes place in most sci fi fantasy- the violence I mean is a heck of a lot worse than this trilogy. It made me hot but it was sonething I actually read from start to finish without skipping to the sex parts.
09/06/2012
Total posts: 30
Unique posters: 15