The most cheeseball lines you've ever heard in a porno...

Rin (aka Nire) Rin (aka Nire)
I got my first porn DVD a little while ago (Playgirl: Bodies in Heat, if you're curious), and I finally got around to watching some of it. I picked a scene at random, and things started out all right. The narration described a woman performing a magic act and bringing a volunteer onstage. Naturally, this being porn, there weren't any magic tricks going on, just sex. Fine by me. The scene wasn't too bad, but at random, the narrator would break my focus with some of the most cheeseball puns I've ever heard (incidentally, narration in porn should be reserved for shots between sex scenes, am I right?).

Probably the one that made me laugh the hardest was referring to the guy's penis as a "magic wand," though mentioning a levitation trick and "making something else rise" comes in as a close second. I don't mind porn having a comedic angle from time to time, but only if that's the intention... this was just bad.

So can anyone out there top this? Bad puns? Cornball dialog? What's the most cheeseball thing you've ever heard while watching porn?
05/22/2012
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Peggi Peggi
LOL I can't think of any right off hand but this is a really good topic!

Porn is riddled with bad puns lol.
05/23/2012
ghalik ghalik
I can't think of any, but this thread should be good if anyone else can!
05/23/2012
Sex Positivity Sex Positivity
I heard "I'm going to tickle your belly button from the inside", which I thought was just a joke people made, but he said it with a dead serious face, and I cracked up. Totally lost the mood.
05/23/2012
Rin (aka Nire) Rin (aka Nire)
Quote:
Originally posted by Sex Positivity
I heard "I'm going to tickle your belly button from the inside", which I thought was just a joke people made, but he said it with a dead serious face, and I cracked up. Totally lost the mood.
That actually sounds kind of gruesome!

"Excuse me, sir, but how do you intend to bypass not only my cervix and womb, but my intestines and other various organs in order to reach my navel without killing me? And just how long is your penis, for that matter, that you find this plan feasible? I don't see 'Long Dong Silver' on your name tag."
05/23/2012
Total posts: 5
Unique posters: 4