At what point do you like to be restrained? What to do before and after?

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At what point do you like to be restrained? What to do before and after?

notjustinbieber notjustinbieber
As a surprise for my wife, I've got some wrist, ankle and thigh restraints on order, along with nipple clamps and some new attachments for our beloved Hitachi Magic Wand. Throw in a bottle of red wine and an empty house and you've got everything you need for one seriously hot night.

But here's my issue, we're new to this. And as I'm trying to playout in my mind how this scenario will work, I'm not entirely sure what to do before and after the restraining and the timing of all of this to maximize the experience for her. I would think that there should be some serious warmup before the restraints are pulled out. Get her really turned on (maybe a really sensual massage) and, just when she thinks we'll be moving on to the main event, restrain her and pull out the toys. However, I'm not entirely sure. Maybe most enjoy being restrained almost right out of the gate.

So here's the question, at what point in your session with your significant other do you prefer to have the restraints come into play? What sort of activities do you like to occur before and after being restrained? Any tips on the activities you like to occur during the restraining? Thanks.
12/07/2012
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notjustinbieber notjustinbieber
Restraints arrived in the mail today. Other toys arrive tomorrow. Will be (hopefully) putting them into action in the next few days. Any responses before then would be appreciated. Thanks!
12/10/2012
higs higs
We do a lot of foreplay, I usually start groping for a while, and 9 out of 10 times I finger her to her first orgasm, then while she's kinda spaced out, I just put the 'tools' out and she usually complies by holding her hands out without a word (sometimes she'll be conscious enough to make a smart-ass remark, but that's quickly remedied with a gag!).

The very first time we did it however, I just asked her "can I tie you up?". Good thing she said yes, opened so many doors!
12/10/2012
MissMori MissMori
Since you mentioned it's a surprise, I assume you already know she'll be into being restrained but she doesn't know it's coming. Am I right?

That sounds seriously hot, so I could see it going a couple of different ways.

Back when I was first getting put into various types of bondage, my partner at the time told me it was coming, then played with me a while and once I was laying in bed very turned on tied me down. So I had an idea I was going to be tied up, but didn't know when.

After that, I had another casual boyfriend who took me home for what I thought was just hot sex, and then he brought out the gear and asked if I was interested. ( I said yes.)

The relationship I'm in right now involves restraint quite often, but since it's full-time D/s we have a lot of ritual and protocol built around it.

To get back to your original thread, if this is a first time thing I think the idea of starting with massage and making out is great!

You could show her the new gear and then tell her it's for later so she'll anticipate it, or you could wait until the sexy times have begun and then tell her you're going to tie her down for the next act and surprise her with the gifts. I guess a lot of it depends on what you think she'll enjoy the most.

I know when I was new I felt good about having foreplay before being restrained, so I think that may be a good start. As far as what you do during and after, every couple is different.

Having a Hitachi used on me while I'm tied down is great! You might find that she likes having that added in. Same for sex, really. Not being able to move much and taking all the pleasure is awesome for me and adds a lot to it.

And even now that I am a "restraint right out the gate" sort of person, I do like to be at least partially untied after I'm done coming so I can cuddle.

Hope that helps a bit! Have fun!
12/10/2012
KinkyKrissy KinkyKrissy
Quote:
Originally posted by MissMori
Since you mentioned it's a surprise, I assume you already know she'll be into being restrained but she doesn't know it's coming. Am I right?

That sounds seriously hot, so I could see it going a couple of different ...
Those are some good tips for bringing it up.
12/11/2012
linnlinn linnlinn
Quote:
Originally posted by MissMori
Since you mentioned it's a surprise, I assume you already know she'll be into being restrained but she doesn't know it's coming. Am I right?

That sounds seriously hot, so I could see it going a couple of different ...
Great poing about the cuddling bit.
12/12/2012
notjustinbieber notjustinbieber
Now that's what I'm talking about! Thank you guys for exactly the sort of reply I was needing!
12/12/2012
A Good Girl A Good Girl
I'm happiest being restrained right away.
03/14/2013
Total posts: 8
Unique posters: 6