Have you ever, in fact, played out a rape scenario, in private, as either the rapist or the victim? Assume both parties have consented of course. You can select only one. Private voting.

I'd never play out a rape scene.

My fiancee and I aren't interesting in trying this kind of thing.

OK first I may be totally stupid for saying this (lol) but I don't know that it could even be called rape play. Heck, I don't know anything about rape PLAY, but I know far too much about rape. I guess I just didn't find the word "rape play" to be a very good name for it because I myself am a rape victim/survivor. It's a touchy thing for me. The reason I say that is because rape is one thing. It is non consentual sex so if both parties are consenting like you said, it cannot be rape at all. I don't know, I probably only feel that way because of being done that way though. There is a huge difference in BDSM and rape though. While my partner and I are OK with light bdsm and I like him to be rough sometimes, I could never be OK with pretending rape. It would bring up some nasty feelings for me that I CANNOT revisit. Someone recently posted about rape fantasys and I asked my partner what he would say if I really had a rape fantasy and wanted to "act it out" he said no! I expected him to, but it made me wonder how he'd feel about it. I just couldn't ever do it. It's hard enough to keep those memories from being in the front of your mind all the time. Too risky for me.

Indeed. I think that's why people prefer to call it something like 'ravishment' play.

Personally, I'm not into it. Luckily, my girl isn't into it either, but if she were, I don't think I could. I might try it, but it would take a lot of convincing for me to do it.

My girlfriend wants to try it, but I don't know if I could even play a rapist...

Not really interested at all, no.

Never been interested, because I was sexually abused in middle school (never touched, but had at least 10 boys tell me on a daily basis that they were going to rape me as soon as they caught me alone). My first boyfriend (a hardcore dom) and I cybered a little bit, and whenever things veered into ravishment territory, I'd freak out. I literally had a panic attack when his character got too forceful with mine.

Years later, my ex-husband made me engage in forced orgasm play, even though I begged him to stop, tried to push him away, and said the safe word. Even though it wasn't PIV, my therapist says that it was a rape. I think that's part of why I'm generally a dom, but I wouldn't indulge my sub if he had a rape fantasy. If there's even a hint that he wants to stop, I'll stop and ask his permission before we continue. It may slow things down, but I'd rather break the fantasy than make him do something he doesn't want to.

My sub has done a rape play scene with an ex (he's a switch), but said that it made him extremely uncomfortable, even though she didn't say the safe word.

I have always had a 'rape' fantasy. An ex boyfriend helped me act it out... Only problem is you can't rape the willing! lol

I've spoken to my husband about this buy he's apprehensive. I just would want my neck off limits.

No, we haven't though we do something sort of similar. I give him the okay for 'surprise sex' I guess...being a better term. Like I'll give him the okay at some point and say it's free game until I give him notice of it being other wise. It's exciting, forceful and unexpected.


I had an indecent when I was younger of being raped, there is a developmental point you're generally supposed to hit before things like that happen. It was more confusing for me then anything and looking back my body reacted appropriately to the situation.

They say it's common for people who have been put through sexual abuse at too young of an age to understand it will end up with sexual issues later in life. One being to avoid the situations, another one being over active sexuality and I'm sure there are more.

I know a surprising number of women who were sexually abused at young ages and a a few of them are left with fantasizing about it, including myself. Not the exact situation mind you, but a far more general one.

i don´t know but this weird

My Owner and I have an agreement.
If I refuse & I don't have a good reason (i.e. period, cramps, whatever) then he's allowed to just take it.

I've always had a force fantasy. I would definitely agree that this differs from rape. Rape is an act of violence purely for violence sake. Force is my man saying 'you're mine & I'm taking what I want' which is completely different because about halfway through, I'm not fighting anymore. He's not being gentle by any means, but he's not trying to harm me.

I find the scenario incredibly hot, altho sometimes annoying but that's life in an D/s relationship.

Almost all my masturbatory fantasies are about forced sex though haven't had many partners I've felt comfortable doing it with IRL.

Never done it, never want to. And yes, I have been assaulted. But I do understand how some people get off on being completely controlled or doing the controlling. But I'd rather the term "Ravishment Play" or something be used instead of "rape", which makes me cringe.

I don't really care either way, but I think my guy would be into it. Things he says sometimes indicate he would like to, but he's never outright said anything about it.

Have in the past but once I realized the hurt and agony that a real rape victim went through I didn't enjoy it anymore.

Nope haven't done it but have always wanted to. Have asked a couple guys before and they weren't into it.

I would never do that. I'm definitely not into it.

This tends to be one of the two flavours of play that me and my bf practise.
Ravishment is a lovely term, and i prefer it to 'rape' play. i feel that 'rape play' just gives a dirty undertone to everything, and also has the possibilty of offending people or making rape seem like no big deal, when it's a huge one.

Nope.