or maybe said " it's ok" or tryed to calm you down, but still did not stop
ever said no and he/ she didn't stop?
12/11/2010
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I'm not really sure what you're asking.
12/11/2010
Quote:
Are you talking about rape, or... what?
Originally posted by
ZenaidaMacroura
I'm not really sure what you're asking.
12/11/2010
Yeah, I'm trying to understand also...
12/11/2010
im talking about anything really like have you ever used a safe word or even just regualt play and have you ever said no.. or used your safe word. and he didnt stop or slow down
12/11/2010
Rape and safewords are very different things... why would you lump those together?
You need to be specific.
You need to be specific.
12/11/2010
Quote:
I definitely agree here with CLP!
Originally posted by
clp
Rape and safewords are very different things... why would you lump those together?
You need to be specific.
You need to be specific.
12/11/2010
I have. I was giving my first bf a blowjob and he grabbed the back of my head to make me deepthroat, I motioned for him to stop and he didn't, I don't remember if he finished or not, but he never got another blowjob.
12/11/2010
With this one guy back in the day. I was a virgin and wanted to remain that way and I said "no" and he said "oh come on" I said "no" again and he said "it's ok" I said "I SAID NO!!" and he jumped off me and said "ok, ok!" and that was that. I've never had anything more than that except that sometimes when I am with my husband I'll tell him "ok stop" when pleasure gets too much and sometimes he'll keep going but it's just because he knows it's ok to and that if I mean business my tone changes.
12/11/2010
I bashed a guy in the head with a plastic cup near my bed when he kept after me when I said no. I've also threatened to bash a guy with a frying pan. I have no fear of men, nor do I ever let one control me. That was back when I was younger, I'm a domme now and never give a guy a chance at top. But if he got cocky and tried... I'd beat the shit out of him with a riding crop.
12/12/2010
No.."no" means NO and when I want something to stop, my guy always listens. Like ANY person should respect the word.
12/14/2010
Quote:
Love this -- sounds like you are not one to mess with, LOL! Kudos to you!
Originally posted by
Midway through
I bashed a guy in the head with a plastic cup near my bed when he kept after me when I said no. I've also threatened to bash a guy with a frying pan. I have no fear of men, nor do I ever let one control me. That was back when I was younger,
...
more
I bashed a guy in the head with a plastic cup near my bed when he kept after me when I said no. I've also threatened to bash a guy with a frying pan. I have no fear of men, nor do I ever let one control me. That was back when I was younger, I'm a domme now and never give a guy a chance at top. But if he got cocky and tried... I'd beat the shit out of him with a riding crop.
less
12/14/2010
No means no....
12/14/2010
Quote:
Yes and it is a major breach of trust that nearly destroyed my relationship with my husband. He was taught by women before me that if you simply push the issue then she'll eventually relax and enjoy it. It took me using words like spousal rape to get him to understand that OUCH and NO mean stop what you are doing or I kick your ass out of my bed. Mind you when he realized I wasn't being coy and it really did hurt either emotionally or physically he never pushed an issue again, it just took me kicking him in the head to get him to realize it! Then again that's what it takes with him sometimes and he's never caused me serious pain physically he did do some major emotional damage.
Originally posted by
mariah
im talking about anything really like have you ever used a safe word or even just regualt play and have you ever said no.. or used your safe word. and he didnt stop or slow down
I think the lesson that needs to be hammered home to everyone is no means NO and maybe means no. Stop means stop not pause to reassure...it means STOP. When I am playing with my subs they understand that a firm stop (safeword or safe action) means EVERYTHING stops and it's time to talk about what went wrong. There is a fragile trust there that should never be trespassed on.
12/14/2010
When I was about 14-15 my boyfriend at the time tried to take things to fast and force himself on me and I said no but he didn't listen so like many other women here-I took action and gave him a knee to his groin and an elbow to the face. Let's just say relationship didn't last much longer after that.
However, things are different with my fiance- we have a clear understanding with eachother and know when enough really means enough. Even though I have said no because the pleasure was a bit intense but he kept going, which was alright and made me have even more pleasure but- he knew ahead of time that it was ok because I told him before hand to keep going until I told him to stop & that it was enough. I was ok with that personally because I knew if I really wanted him to stop what he was doing, he would stop otherwise...he knows the consequences. But I think the main issue here is that a lot of men get confused between what is acceptable and what is not because of the types of role playing or whatever you want to call it that some of us like to play. If you are into being dominated then that is fine but you both need to communicate beforehand and there needs to be an equal level of understanding that when one person says enough or no and it is not part of the play then it's over. period. Even if you are not into playing like that-controlling the other person or dominating them- you should still be clear before things get steamy what is and isnt acceptable. We cant assume everyone is on the same level. And by no means am I excusing a man not listening when you say no. NO MEANS NO, NO OTHER OPTION!
*sorry if this doesn't make much sense-Being tired but unable to sleep does bad things to my communication skills.
However, things are different with my fiance- we have a clear understanding with eachother and know when enough really means enough. Even though I have said no because the pleasure was a bit intense but he kept going, which was alright and made me have even more pleasure but- he knew ahead of time that it was ok because I told him before hand to keep going until I told him to stop & that it was enough. I was ok with that personally because I knew if I really wanted him to stop what he was doing, he would stop otherwise...he knows the consequences. But I think the main issue here is that a lot of men get confused between what is acceptable and what is not because of the types of role playing or whatever you want to call it that some of us like to play. If you are into being dominated then that is fine but you both need to communicate beforehand and there needs to be an equal level of understanding that when one person says enough or no and it is not part of the play then it's over. period. Even if you are not into playing like that-controlling the other person or dominating them- you should still be clear before things get steamy what is and isnt acceptable. We cant assume everyone is on the same level. And by no means am I excusing a man not listening when you say no. NO MEANS NO, NO OTHER OPTION!
*sorry if this doesn't make much sense-Being tired but unable to sleep does bad things to my communication skills.
12/14/2010
Have I ever said no and they didn't stop? Yeah, that's how I lost my virginity.
I wish I felt I had more self-worth back then to punch him in the fucking face.
I wish I felt I had more self-worth back then to punch him in the fucking face.
12/17/2010
Quote:
you go girl!!!!!
Originally posted by
Illusional
Have I ever said no and they didn't stop? Yeah, that's how I lost my virginity.
I wish I felt I had more self-worth back then to punch him in the fucking face.
I wish I felt I had more self-worth back then to punch him in the fucking face.
can't say that i would have been much different.
12/17/2010
No, but he tried to convince me to change my mind but I held my position.
12/23/2010
Quote:
That's how I lost mine too. You're not alone.
Originally posted by
Illusional
Have I ever said no and they didn't stop? Yeah, that's how I lost my virginity.
I wish I felt I had more self-worth back then to punch him in the fucking face.
I wish I felt I had more self-worth back then to punch him in the fucking face.
01/07/2011
I had a boyfriend who didn't stop when I said no. Albeit, it wasn't as forceful of a 'No' as it should've been but he got angry very easily. I figured if I would've said stop in a harsh way, he would've gotten really mad and I don't know what would've happened. All the same though, no still means no.
01/10/2011
My first boyfriend and I would fool around and I sort of got into a "no" habbit. I was afraid and not willing but I experienced pleasure at the same time, so it was weird. I would say no, and he would continue and I would try to stop him but it was asthough it was part of our fooling around. I'm not sure what to make of that experience. It didn't last long between us thankfully.
01/10/2011
I put kind of because my ex would put me in situations like that, but my current SO hasn't ever done that.
01/10/2011
Quote:
I have been raped by both of my ex-fiances. One was prior to us breaking up (thus the reason i left him) and the other i had broken up with about a week or two before but was still living in the same apartment.
Originally posted by
mariah
or maybe said " it's ok" or tryed to calm you down, but still did not stop
And for those who are saying that rape and a safe word are different. Yes you are right but if you say the safe word to stop it and they DONT then it is rape.
01/12/2011
Quote:
You are my new hero.
Originally posted by
Midway through
I bashed a guy in the head with a plastic cup near my bed when he kept after me when I said no. I've also threatened to bash a guy with a frying pan. I have no fear of men, nor do I ever let one control me. That was back when I was younger,
...
more
I bashed a guy in the head with a plastic cup near my bed when he kept after me when I said no. I've also threatened to bash a guy with a frying pan. I have no fear of men, nor do I ever let one control me. That was back when I was younger, I'm a domme now and never give a guy a chance at top. But if he got cocky and tried... I'd beat the shit out of him with a riding crop.
less
01/12/2011
Quote:
Definitely agree
Originally posted by
clp
Rape and safewords are very different things... why would you lump those together?
You need to be specific.
You need to be specific.
01/26/2011
Quote:
This would be the point where I bite lol
Originally posted by
Emma (Girl With Fire)
I have. I was giving my first bf a blowjob and he grabbed the back of my head to make me deepthroat, I motioned for him to stop and he didn't, I don't remember if he finished or not, but he never got another blowjob.
01/26/2011
Quote:
My heart goes out to all of you who voted with a response other than "No!" Thank you for being strong enough to share your stories. I have no doubt that you have all become beautiful powerful ladies as results of your misfortunes and others are gaining strength/hope in hearing they are not alone! Keep being bold and outspoken!
Originally posted by
mariah
or maybe said " it's ok" or tryed to calm you down, but still did not stop
Much love and respect!
01/26/2011
Quote:
You're my hero lol
Originally posted by
Midway through
I bashed a guy in the head with a plastic cup near my bed when he kept after me when I said no. I've also threatened to bash a guy with a frying pan. I have no fear of men, nor do I ever let one control me. That was back when I was younger,
...
more
I bashed a guy in the head with a plastic cup near my bed when he kept after me when I said no. I've also threatened to bash a guy with a frying pan. I have no fear of men, nor do I ever let one control me. That was back when I was younger, I'm a domme now and never give a guy a chance at top. But if he got cocky and tried... I'd beat the shit out of him with a riding crop.
less
01/26/2011
Quote:
I may have, but not hard. Just enough to make him uncomfortable.
Originally posted by
sweet seduction
This would be the point where I bite lol
01/27/2011
Once... I like breath play and my playmate and I had a system where I tap somewhere on him to say "ok, I need to breathe" one time thing got out of hand and he straddled my chest and put his hands and weight on my throat and even those I was tapping, crying and clawing at his hands he didn’t stop, I tired to push him off me but he is much bigger than I am and I couldn’t eventually he stopped but needless to say that was the last time he ever got close to me.
01/28/2011