Spanking as Play when you have kids

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Spanking as Play when you have kids

P'Gell P'Gell
I want to start by saying My Man and I do not use Corporeal Punishment with our children. I don't think that children learn anything by being hit, especially by their parents and I think that there are better ways to teach children the difference between Right and Wrong.

That being said, both My Man and I were "spanked" as children for punishment.

Who knows if it carried over, but we like a little spanking (mostly he spanks me, I only hit him without realizing it when I Come really hard. Then I apologize. It's part of our dynamic.)

My worry is, the kids might on occasion hear it, and think something "wrong" is going on. I don't want them to think their father is actually "hurting" me, as that would send the wrong message, both about sex and about our relationship. As a result, it doesn't happen as often as either of us would like, and I feel like My Man is holding back, for fear of the noise. It doesn't take much to make a loud smacking noise, even with only minor, and exciting sensation. I don't want to scare the kids, and we always wait until they little ones are in bed. We also have a White Noise Machine and a humidifier on, to dull any and all sexual noises, but sometimes we still are heard. (The other night, there was a knock on the door, long after we though the Little One was sleeping and she was saying, "Hey, what's all the yelling about?" I almost wanted to fall into a crack in the ground. I kind of fibbed and said her Daddy was making me laugh (OK, he was making me Come, which is damn close!) but I don't want the kids to get the wrong idea about sex.

Has anyone dealt with this issue? Either dealing with regular sex noises or having to hold back on Impact Play? What did you do? How did it work?
10/26/2010
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Madeira Madeira
Well I started having BDSM sex while living in a house with kids (I was the eldest, I'm ten years older than my youngest brother) and my then girlfriend and I simply explained the noise as "Clapping games" which we did actually play a lot as well... if worse comes to work just have the hubby sing "Miss Mary Mack" while spanking you...
10/26/2010
P'Gell P'Gell
Quote:
Originally posted by Madeira
Well I started having BDSM sex while living in a house with kids (I was the eldest, I'm ten years older than my youngest brother) and my then girlfriend and I simply explained the noise as "Clapping games" which we did actually play a ...
Hahaha, Miss Mary Mac. Cute. Our youngest is one of those kids who doesn't usually say anything and is pretty intellectually sophisticated. She's 11, and knows adults don't play clapping games. That would work with a small child, but not a tween. When we bought the White Noise Machine, she was having trouble sleeping, and very young, but we recently moved her room down the hall,(mostly to give us more privacy) and her older sister asked, "Why are you guys moving her?" the kid just looked at her sister and rolled her eyes and said, "Why do you think I still have a White Noise Machine?"

But, thanks. I think that would work with a younger kid. But, not her. My main worry isn't that she knows we're having sex (she knows that, it's obvious and I don't really have a problem with that) but that "hitting" has negative connotations to many children. As we don't hit our kids, my main concern is her not thinking her father is really hurting me.

Thanks for the input.
10/26/2010
Mr. E Mr. E
"... if worse comes to work just have the hubby sing "Miss Mary Mack" while spanking you"

That is hilarious!

After our youngest knocked on the door and asked "mom are you okay?", we decided to relocate our more adventurous bedroom activities to the other side of the house. We are fortunate to have a rarely used home gym, "sexercise" room that is relatively sound proof. It helps, but we still try to keep the noise down.
10/26/2010
SexyTabby SexyTabby
I still haven't found an answer to this problem. Two of mine are old enough to know something is going on behind the door but the other definitely not. Had my oldest come tell me there's strange noises lol Another time he came to see what was going on cuz I got loud. Luckily he didn't have a chance to see anything but we told him we were wrestling.

I'm afraid they'll get some weird ideas in their heads and not be brave enough to ask about them.
10/26/2010
P'Gell P'Gell
Quote:
Originally posted by Mr. E
"... if worse comes to work just have the hubby sing "Miss Mary Mack" while spanking you"

That is hilarious!

After our youngest knocked on the door and asked "mom are you okay?", we decided to relocate our ...
Oh, what I wouldn't give for a Sex Room/Dungeon. I pretty much insisted on one spare bedroom for guests (which got used up when we had more kids) and a home library, when we were looking for houses. I got both. But, we had really small kids and "I want a Sex Dungeon for our next house." wasn't on the radar at the time.

My main concern is not scaring her, either away from sex or her father. For now, we keep it as quiet as possible. The funny thing is, she sees him smacking my ass all the time, in the kitchen, in the living room, wherever and knows it's "play." We have a very playful relationship. But I know kids get weird ideas about sexual exploits of their parents when they're young, and I don't want her scared.
10/27/2010
P'Gell P'Gell
Quote:
Originally posted by SexyTabby
I still haven't found an answer to this problem. Two of mine are old enough to know something is going on behind the door but the other definitely not. Had my oldest come tell me there's strange noises lol Another time he came to see what ...
That's exactly it. I don't think she'd say anything, (despite us having a "Open door" idea in our house, when it comes to questions.) But, I don't think she'd ask about this. I don't want her thinking anything horrible or scary.

We talk about sex with our kids, but not our own sex lives. I can give a great totally clinical talk about sex, but my OWN sex life needs it's boundaries that don't intersect with giving children information they need to grow. I feel it's good to be open, but not break any emotional boundaries that children need to stay innocent and beautiful while they are young.

Kids can know what sex is about. They don't need the details of D/S or BDSM relationship dynamics at 11, I don't think. It's a hard thing to deal with.
10/27/2010
Persephone Nightmare Persephone Nightmare
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
That's exactly it. I don't think she'd say anything, (despite us having a "Open door" idea in our house, when it comes to questions.) But, I don't think she'd ask about this. I don't want her thinking anything ...
/agree 100%
10/27/2010
briluminary briluminary
Quote:
Originally posted by Madeira
Well I started having BDSM sex while living in a house with kids (I was the eldest, I'm ten years older than my youngest brother) and my then girlfriend and I simply explained the noise as "Clapping games" which we did actually play a ...
Yesss! Perfect!
08/12/2011
moose1120 moose1120
Our little guy is too young for this to be an issue yet, since he still can be counted on for a good nap. Our dogs, on the other hand, will break down the door to the bedroom if they hear us start...and then they will either try to kill me or not speak to me for a week....
08/14/2011
domsub1993 domsub1993
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
I want to start by saying My Man and I do not use Corporeal Punishment with our children. I don't think that children learn anything by being hit, especially by their parents and I think that there are better ways to teach children the difference ...
Our oldest (a teenager) heard the spanking one night after we thought he was fast asleep. He came down and asked us if we had heard that noise that sounded like a basketball being dribbled. We said yes. He asked if that's what we thought it was and we answered, ''Could be.''
08/31/2011
Total posts: 11
Unique posters: 8