First time strap on sex for guys?

Contributor: cj89 cj89
so strap on sex has always been a topic of discussion between my girlfriend and i, and now our discussions will be put to rest as we will be trying it soon. what i was wondering: what do the other guys out there think of their first time experiences? ive used very simple dildos, and a buttplug, so im expecting something different. your thoughts?
11/07/2012
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Contributor: GingerAnn GingerAnn
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11/07/2012
Contributor: robertk2380 robertk2380
Quote:
Originally posted by cj89
so strap on sex has always been a topic of discussion between my girlfriend and i, and now our discussions will be put to rest as we will be trying it soon. what i was wondering: what do the other guys out there think of their first time experiences? ... more
It may be awkward for both of you, so don't be surprised if things aren't as exciting the first time out. That said, if you use lots of lube, (then use more), talk throughout about what you're feeling and go slowly, you'll likely enjoy it. Will take some getting used to. Our first time was very good as I look back. Found it very pleasurable once we got into a comfortable rhythm. Go slowly, take your time and see what you like in terms of angles, pace, etc. Good luck.
11/11/2012
Contributor: ScottA ScottA
Take some time before you peg to get everything ready. Buy the harness and dildo together so you get something you're both comfortable with, and have some non-pegging "get to know the equipment" sessions for you both. Have her wear the harness for a couple hours to get used to the feelings and adjustments, and do some dry runs to practice thrusting and control.

Also try out different positions without the dildo. You're looking for one thats comfortable and that you both can relax in.

Talk out your first time. Figure out what preparations you want to take, what foreplay you think you want, and make sure that all materials are handy (paper towels are nice to have handy and not always easy to remember). Figure out whether she'll have an orgasm first or not. If she hasn't played with your butt yet that's a good thing to do as well.

Don't plan on it being wonderful the first time. It will probably be awkward and may seem a bit bizarre. If you both like the idea go ahead and plan on suspending judgement for a couple of sessions until you can get the hang of it.
11/15/2012
Contributor: spiced spiced
Great advice, ScottA! I don't know if she'll need to wear the harness for several hours (unless you're going to do some "packing" play); 15-30 minutes should be plenty, IMO. But I totally agree that she should take the time to get comfortable with the equipment.

I would also suggest "breaking yourself in" with a dildo close to the same size she'll use on you. If possible, warm up by penetrating yourself a couple/few hours before she pegs you. I strongly suggest giving yourself an enema beforehand.

Be sure to use plenty of lube, both on yourself and on the dildo. I like Astroglide, but use whatever works for you.

Definitely keep it light and playful. Above all: Have fun!
11/17/2012
Contributor: ScottA ScottA
Be certain that the enema (if you use one) isn't a chemical "Fleet's" type. Use warm water!

You do need to be comfortable during play, if you're worried about mess then you can't relax as much and it won't be enjoyable. If you're not worried about mess then you don't need to bother with an enema (you can always do a "dry run" with a handheld dildo in the bathroom to check).

One of the reasons I recommended a longer time is so she can practice thrusting (she can use her hands to "jack off" the dildo while thrusting).
11/17/2012
Contributor: spiced spiced
Quote:
Originally posted by ScottA
Be certain that the enema (if you use one) isn't a chemical "Fleet's" type. Use warm water!

You do need to be comfortable during play, if you're worried about mess then you can't relax as much and it won't be ... more
Totally agree. Warm water is all a person needs. And maybe something like this: link
11/18/2012
Contributor: squire squire
Lots of sound advice can be found in the comments above. I think for me the trick was trying it a few times to iron out the awkwardness of it all. By that, I am more referring to the mechanics of using your particular toy and your partner getting comfortable with the hip movements to where it's got a fun rhythm. I think it can be anticlimactic for some, but for me the psychological component, tied with my interest/enjoyment of being anally penetrated, made for a wonderful experience after the first few times.
11/18/2012
Contributor: John444 John444
Start by eating light that day and give yourself an enema a few hours prior or an hour minimum. Start with a smaller toy then something similar and size. I strongly suggest starting on top your first time as you can control the depth, and speed of the penetration. Once you feel that you can take it without any tinge of pain try doggie style or missionary and let her do the thrusting. The feeling of her thrusting in unlike when you are using a dildo though the penetration is similar. Hope it was great.
05/30/2013
Contributor: Alex Time Alex Time
Great advice from everyone here.

Some advice from my perspective:

- play with you own ass first. You have to get used to relaxing your ass before someone else puts something in it for you
- if you're starting with a dildo 1.25" diameter then either try plugs of that size (or larger) to warm you up before you let your partner loose on your ass!
- go slow at first. This is quite important. If at any point it hurts stops and take a minute to get used to it.
- breath! Sounds silly but normally if you breath out when she's penetrating, your ass will more likely be receptive. Holding your breath is not a good thing as you're normally bracing and more likely to tense up.
- persistence is the most important. Seldom is the first time earth shattering. Look at about 10 sessions to get into it fully!

Enjoy this new experience!
06/24/2013