Why is this topic under the BDSM category??

FieryRed FieryRed
This may have been discussed previously, but I'm still somewhat new here, and was quite confused to find the "Strap It On" topic listed under the "BDSM" category. Obviously the two can be combined--strap-on sex can be indulged in as part of BDSM play--but for many people, including me, strap-on sex is just a normal part of "vanilla" sex, as well. If strap-on sex is BDSM, then so is any kind of toy use. What's up with this, EF?
03/29/2013
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spiced spiced
Well, I think it has been discussed before, but it's been a while.

I think it comes from the way strap-on sex — especially pegging — is portrayed in adult films. It's usually shown as a very D/s thing. That's how I first discovered it and I imagine that's true for a lot of people. I'm kinky as hell anyway, so the D/s aspect really turned me on (and still does)!

But you're right: strap-on sex can be any and all of the different ways any other kind of sex can be. It's unfortunate that it gets such a narrow portrayal in adult films. I think it has led to unfortunate and inaccurate stereotypes in society — and more surprisingly, even on Eden!
03/31/2013
kendra30752 kendra30752
Quote:
Originally posted by FieryRed
This may have been discussed previously, but I'm still somewhat new here, and was quite confused to find the "Strap It On" topic listed under the "BDSM" category. Obviously the two can be combined--strap-on sex can be indulged ... More
I don't know why it's such a big deal. Obviously, EF can't put everything into a category that pleases or completely fits for every person. I think it's just one of those minor little things we can look over. Maybe for other people, strap-ons are part of that to them. If it were in another section, there'd still be a problem. That's the thing. Also, not everybody has the same idea of what "vanilla" is.

Just a thought.
03/31/2013
FieryRed FieryRed
Quote:
Originally posted by kendra30752
I don't know why it's such a big deal. Obviously, EF can't put everything into a category that pleases or completely fits for every person. I think it's just one of those minor little things we can look over. Maybe for other people, ... More
Sure, different people have different ideas of what constitutes vanilla, or non-BDSM, sex. However, BDSM universally means Bondage/Discipline, Domination/Submission, and Sadism/Masochism. Strap-on sex isn't specific to any of those categories, any more than penis-vagina sex is. It's not something I would lose sleep over, but as a gay woman, it feels a bit marginalizing to see standard lesbian sex fare labeled as kinky.
03/31/2013
snowminx snowminx
Yeah I think is it pretty weird, exp when you think about female couples. Where's the bdsm in that? I don't really see it as vanilla sex for me but I don't see it as some kind of dom/sub or other bondage thing either. Personally I think it should be under sex toy information, would make more sense there to me! (that's where I first looked for it and was about to look it under "other")
04/01/2013
FieryRed FieryRed
Quote:
Originally posted by snowminx
Yeah I think is it pretty weird, exp when you think about female couples. Where's the bdsm in that? I don't really see it as vanilla sex for me but I don't see it as some kind of dom/sub or other bondage thing either. Personally I think ... More
Exactly. Or maybe under a gender-play category. I'm wondering if it was placed here more with reference to pegging? Though that really isn't specifically BDSM, either... Eh. At least we found it.
04/02/2013
Total posts: 6
Unique posters: 4