#RomanceAllYear - Turn the heat up?! (Worst Idea Ever!)

Someone I worked with told me to put one of those Listerine dissolving strips on my clit and then have a fan blow on it, she said it was amazing, mind blowing....So, stupid me-I tried it: I took my desk fan placed it on the bed between my spread legs, turned it on and used the strip. Ummm I think the image speaks for itself, I don't need to describe the extreme burning, jumping up, knocking fan onto the floor and rushing to the shower where the water made it worse. It was terrible, I was walking funny for days, I considered going to the doctor to see if I should/put a cream on it but that was too much 'American Pie' type humiliation for me-I already felt like the most idiotic person and I hadn't even told anyone. (until now) less

"You don't need lube. Just think about what I'm doing to you." This was more like anti-advice, from the ex-husband. He took it as a personal affront on his manliness if I needed artificial lubrication instead of being naturally dripping wet. I'd give in, we'd start sex, then-- surprise surprise! -- my natural secretions wouldn't last the entire encounter and he'd have to pull out (with lots of complaints) to add the lube that he should have used in the first place. less

The worst advice was to use fruit juice as a douche...LOL..I look back and think HOW?! I honestly think that a pineapple / "fishy" combo has to be unpleasant to be faced with... not to mention that it took a good month to get that out of my system...gross! I haven't had bad advice actually work..it's all been just bad advice that at worst was disgusting, and at best was hilarious... less

Recently, the new editor for Cosmopolitan magazine, Joanna Coles was quoted as saying internet porn has become the default way to learn about sex and that she's over "gay men writing advice columns for women" (loosely paraphrased, of course). As a tribute to the declaration of an end of an era of really interesting sex advice, I thought it would be fun if we could reminiscence on those we've overheard or been told "work like a charm" that sound so horrible it made you cross your legs and wince.What is the absolute worst piece of advice someone has ever given when it comes spicing up their sex life? Do you know anyone (you, perhaps?) who took said advice and had a favorable outcome? Any crash and burn scenarios? I'm currently picturing the scene in National Lampoon's Van Wilder when Taj is set on fire by after dousing himself in a bottle of fragrant, alcohol-based massage oil and then backing into lit candles. Ouch!)We all a brand new sex toy adds a new element to a session, whether solo or partnered, so check out this week's promotions to turn up the heat! We're offering 15%, 20% and 25% off hundreds of dildos, vibrators and fetish gear! Get yours while supplies last and don't forget about the Facebook Friends Special where you'll save up to 70% off glass g-spot and vibrating g-spot toys.But, wait! There's more! This week on Eden Cafe we're giving away great toys - the Tor II, Lx-4 and the Zini Deux. less

Recently, the new editor for Cosmopolitan magazine, Joanna Coles was quoted as saying internet porn has become the default way to learn about sex and that she's over "gay men writing advice columns for women" (loosely paraphrased, of course). As a tribute to the declaration of an end of an era of really interesting sex advice, I thought it would be fun if we could reminiscence on those we've overheard or been told "work like a charm" that sound so horrible it made you cross your legs and wince.What is the absolute worst piece of advice someone has ever given when it comes spicing up their sex life? Do you know anyone (you, perhaps?) who took said advice and had a favorable outcome? Any crash and burn scenarios? I'm currently picturing the scene in National Lampoon's Van Wilder when Taj is set on fire by after dousing himself in a bottle of fragrant, alcohol-based massage oil and then backing into lit candles. Ouch!)We all a brand new sex toy adds a new element to a session, whether solo or partnered, so check out this week's promotions to turn up the heat! We're offering 15%, 20% and 25% off hundreds of dildos, vibrators and fetish gear! Get yours while supplies last and don't forget about the Facebook Friends Special where you'll save up to 70% off glass g-spot and vibrating g-spot toys.But, wait! There's more! This week on Eden Cafe we're giving away great toys - the Tor II, Lx-4 and the Zini Deux. less

The worst piece of advice anyone has ever given me was that it's okay to use vaseline, regular hand lotions or other various things as lubrication and that it wouldn't matter if food products (chocolate syrup, sugary things) got in my vagina.

It definitely is NOT okay to use any of these products inside your vagina and my doctor gave me a lengthy lecture about body safe products (and a prescription for anti-biotics for the nasty infection these things caused). I guess it was positive because after that talk with my gyno, I was more aware of my body and what was okay for it and especially what isn't okay for it. less

Recently, the new editor for Cosmopolitan magazine, Joanna Coles was quoted as saying internet porn has become the default way to learn about sex and that she's over "gay men writing advice columns for women" (loosely paraphrased, of course). As a tribute to the declaration of an end of an era of really interesting sex advice, I thought it would be fun if we could reminiscence on those we've overheard or been told "work like a charm" that sound so horrible it made you cross your legs and wince.What is the absolute worst piece of advice someone has ever given when it comes spicing up their sex life? Do you know anyone (you, perhaps?) who took said advice and had a favorable outcome? Any crash and burn scenarios? I'm currently picturing the scene in National Lampoon's Van Wilder when Taj is set on fire by after dousing himself in a bottle of fragrant, alcohol-based massage oil and then backing into lit candles. Ouch!)We all a brand new sex toy adds a new element to a session, whether solo or partnered, so check out this week's promotions to turn up the heat! We're offering 15%, 20% and 25% off hundreds of dildos, vibrators and fetish gear! Get yours while supplies last and don't forget about the Facebook Friends Special where you'll save up to 70% off glass g-spot and vibrating g-spot toys.But, wait! There's more! This week on Eden Cafe we're giving away great toys - the Tor II, Lx-4 and the Zini Deux. less