Originally posted by
The amount of pain I had to go through due to my harsh break up with my lying, cheating verbally-abusive was too much to bare. I'm serious, it almost killed me, but that's a long story. I wish I never met him or wasted my love on him.
The amount of pain I had to go through due to my harsh break up with my lying, cheating verbally-abusive was too much to bare. I'm serious, it almost killed me, but that's a long story. I wish I never met him or wasted my love on him. I've been abused in the past and he was the first man I trusted with my heart and body, and he threw it away. If I could change time, I wish I've never fallen in love with him. I just can't relate to when people say that it is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all; it all just sounds like a bunch of nice bullshit to me.
If nothing else, I hope the relationship taught you how to recognize the traits of an abuser before you become so invested. I'm sorry you had to experience it, no one ever deserves it.
Have you ever considered counseling other women on their experiences or maybe working with foundations supporting research for your illness? It might be a good way to meet people who won't turn away from you and who would understand the things you're going through.
I'm not trying to compare the two situations in the slightest, but my husband has an issue with sciatica. It flares up occasionally. I always kind of felt like, if he isn't taken to bed then he's probably okay.
The other day I went to step out from the little cubby space I've built for myself and as I turned, my brain was in full gear but my legs weren't. I heard my hip snap and then that gut-sickening pain started. For the next four days, every time I moved I felt like someone was snapping a rubberband underneath my skin. Never again will I question the level of pain he feels.
I had to experience it to understand it.