As friendly & understanding members--shouldn't we practice forgiveness to new members who make a mistake? Especially when they showed courage and integrity in messaging those who were offended?

The New Intimacy

As friendly & understanding members--shouldn't we practice forgiveness to new members who make a mistake? Especially when they showed courage and integrity in messaging those who were offended?

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Contributor: js250 js250
There was an issue that came up & I added to it with my frustrations.

--I was reminded of how I felt as a brand new member & was trying to do the right thing by copying others examples. I do appreciate the administrator that answered all of my questions, no matter how silly or obvious. We should never forget to care for & help our new members--we were new once as well!! Lets stop the pettiness & get busy helping them.

When a person acts with complete sincerity, honesty & integrity, it shows good character--these people should be appreciated, not ostracized!!! That is NOT what EF is about, we are an accepting community. One person should not get the blame for everyone else. I had no idea what this person was apologizing to me for & felt very small & humbled after I read the message.

In retrospect, I should have explained EF's policies. I am going to stop passing the buck & start being a responsible, experienced member. I promise to help & be there for our new members--to welcome them & help them fit in & be part of this wonderful, caring & friendly site.

Anyone with me on this???
07/01/2012
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Contributor: js250 js250
To the person this concerns---I am sorry and will always be here for you. I am glad you are a new member and would like to welcome you. Please message me with any questions or just to say hi. You are a very honorable person and I am sorry for contributing to the anger and blame you have previously felt. You made an honest mistake and no one took the time to explain Eden's policies. Thank you for the message.
07/01/2012
Contributor: Peggi Peggi
If you're talking about that discussion that was in a poll earlier, I completely agree. I did get the second message in regards to that issue, and once I saw it was a misunderstanding, I was happy to be friendly and even offer advice and extend a hand in friendship.

I even noted in my reply message that I remembered how confusing it was to keep track of all of the rules. I think the expectations of conduct are a must-read for all users, but the problem is, even I didn't discover them until I'd been posting and playing around on the site for a while.

I think we all get frustrated from time to time when we are more seasoned members and something comes out of the blue like that, and to US it seems like one of those things where "well they should've just KNOWN better" when in reality, not all websites are run the way Eden is, and in some places things are fine and they may not be as accepted here, but in other places they are.

The same user also mentioned that they didn't know that rating on the reviews should be for the review itself and NOT the item, so I'm thinking of posting a suggestion thread which was already brought up by another user on here, that when you go to vote on a review for the first few times you should get an alert that you are voting for the REVIEW and NOT the product, because that confusion seems to be causing a lot of hurt feelings and anger. A lot of people assume it is also point farming, and that causes hard feelings.

I agree, we should all work more on understanding the REASON behind things like that rather than be mean to another user, however, I agree with what myself and a few others did in reporting it to an admin, simply because I'm sure if we'd tried to deal with it on our own, more hurt feelings would've been had, because the user and other users in similar situations of course, might've felt ganged up on!
07/01/2012
Contributor: KrissyNovacaine KrissyNovacaine
Quote:
Originally posted by Peggi
If you're talking about that discussion that was in a poll earlier, I completely agree. I did get the second message in regards to that issue, and once I saw it was a misunderstanding, I was happy to be friendly and even offer advice and extend ... more
As a new user I was very confused and hard a hard time finding information on here. I hope that Eden can flesh out their FAQs a little more about reviews and how voting works. I didn't discover the forums right away, so I didn't have that as a resource.
07/01/2012
Contributor: Peggi Peggi
Quote:
Originally posted by KrissyNovacaine
As a new user I was very confused and hard a hard time finding information on here. I hope that Eden can flesh out their FAQs a little more about reviews and how voting works. I didn't discover the forums right away, so I didn't have that as ... more
See? It happens ALL the time! I didn't discover the forums right away either, and once I did, I didn't know to look up what should or shouldn't take place. I just used what I thought was common sense (playing nice with others, not saying anything offensive, etc) and that was it for a few weeks at least!
07/01/2012
Contributor: - Kira - - Kira -
I agree - it's been discussed before but the rules on what's being voted on really need to be made more clear. Way too many people make the mistake of voting on the item and not the review. Are all downvotes because of this? No, but I bet a decent amount are and I bet the people who downvote and find out that they were supposed to rate the review feel bad afterward.

For the record, I did message the person in question and explain that messages for voting were frowned upon when I got the message. I suppose I didn't explain clearly enough because the message just got tweaked a little bit after that. So in this case again a more easy to access and understand FAQ would have been helpful. I feel like I did try to explain as best I could at the time and even offered the mentor program as a way to get higher votes on reviews. I agree with js250 - we can't just ignore things and hope they stop. If something is going on that is against community policy, it's best to take the time to explain and offer help.
07/01/2012