Suggestions on anal sex

mfletcher1 mfletcher1
My husband is a fan of anal sex...I am not lol what things could we do to maybe make things a little more comfortable for me being that its painful thus being the reason I don"t care for it just looking for toys or maybe positioning devices im not sure thanks for your suggestions!
04/09/2013
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dakdack dakdack
You could start small. While he's going down on you. You on your back or side. When you're getting really hot he could start by just massaging your anus. Same scenario, using a lube made for anal (desensitizing or not), build up to a finger or a slim bead wand. My experience is limited. I did learn that while beginning you can't continue to pull out and push back in repeatedly. It takes a bit to get comfortable having something put up your ass and you don't want to repeatedly go through insertion. So once it's in, leave it, be patient and it will most likely become more comfortable. Also, it's a submissive act. You have to make sure that he understands to listen to what you find comfortable and have a safe word once you've had enough. We say "mustard". If you have any issues with the sanitary part there's cleaning products available on the site. Oh and when my wife is drunk, not a fan of anal either, she's way more up for it. A couple drinks might go a long way if you tend to reflexively tense up when something gets near your ass, another use for the "social lubricant".
04/09/2013
Ciao. Ciao.
Just as an FYI, it's not recommended that you use a desensitizing lube. Pain is a good indicator that things are not peachy down there, so you want to know if that's happening. Same goes for alcohol consumption prior to anal (a drink or two is fine, but don't get drunk), it dulls pain/response time and reduces any natural lubricant you might have...hurray

Start with a finger (preferably yours!) and plenty of lube and just do some exploring, then move to his finger. Incorporate some fingering into your other foreplay/sex and see how it works for you. From there you might want to try a (small) butt plug, vibrator, or other wand. Again, try that out for a while and see where you get to.

Then, and only then, I'd give your husband's cock a shot. Remember, slow, plenty of lube, and if it doesn't work the first time don't force it.

Anal can be totally comfortable and pleasurable, but it takes patience.

And if you find it's just not your thing, don't feel guilty. So it goes. (For the record I love anal play).
04/09/2013
Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
For over 20 years my wife resisted anal sex. Once she agreed to be patient and allow me to prepare her for sex with adequate lubrication and dilation.

Initially there is still an adaptation to having things go 'in the out door' - but after about 1 month, she's like a lifelong pro.

The primary issue is mental. Accept that this is something that you are doing for your lover - but that will also contribute to your pleasure with patience and care.

The first step for us is to make sure she has an orgasm using some toys - often with some anal penetration using a finger or small vibe.

Then if we are going to have anal sex, I will apply a lot more lube, reinsert a finger, then a second, then a modest size vibrating butt plug - something with a maximum girth of 1.25-1.5" diameter.

Once I am able to insert it, I then partially remove it - providing gradual anal stretching. Usually after about 2-4 minutes she will tell me she is ready.

I add a new coating of silicone lube to both of us. Typically I place her hips on our Wedge pillow - then enter. Once I enter, I do not move - but allow her time to adapt. After a minute or so - I can begin slow thrusting.

Side comment - it helped that she did anal play on me - so I knew firsthand what she was experiencing - both the initial discomfort - and the pleasure that ensues.

Final comment - by having her apply her Mystic Wand to her clit, she was able to orgasm during anal sex.

Good luck - patience and there is no such thing as too much lube@!
04/10/2013
Fluke Fluke
Butt plug, lube and lots of wine.
04/10/2013
mfletcher1 mfletcher1
this is the best information ive gotten about this lol thank you all and its kinda made me excited to really give this a shot lol this website is really opening my mind to new and exciting sexual things haha def learning alot!
04/12/2013
Total posts: 6
Unique posters: 5