Help With Anal Play!

Babylove09 Babylove09
My hubby just came out and said when he was younger he experimented with anal play by himself. He kinda liked it but he's really shy about it. What could I do or use to make him feel good but not make him feel awkward?
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
Penatration
8
Outside play
13
Toys
7
Fingers
17
Other
5
Total votes: 50 (21 voters)
Poll is closed
11/11/2012
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Luca77 Luca77
How I became less shy about it was my then-gf would finger my ass while giving me a bj.
11/11/2012
Ciao. Ciao.
Fingers are very non-threatening, but if he shared that he experimented some with it and you reacted either enthusiastically...or at least not negatively, I am sure he'd probably also be open to trying out some other things as well. Maybe try a really simple, small anal plug and see if he enjoys wearing it during sex. I would shy away from going straight to something like pegging/dildo penetration, but fingers and plugs should get you both a good sense if it's something you want to explore further.
11/11/2012
Babylove09 Babylove09
Quote:
Originally posted by Luca77
How I became less shy about it was my then-gf would finger my ass while giving me a bj.
Thanks it helps alot to hear from a guy.
11/11/2012
Babylove09 Babylove09
Quote:
Originally posted by Ciao.
Fingers are very non-threatening, but if he shared that he experimented some with it and you reacted either enthusiastically...or at least not negatively, I am sure he'd probably also be open to trying out some other things as well. Maybe try a ... More
Thank you for your help. I'll try that!
11/11/2012
Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by Babylove09
My hubby just came out and said when he was younger he experimented with anal play by himself. He kinda liked it but he's really shy about it. What could I do or use to make him feel good but not make him feel awkward?
Tell him you are happy he told you. That is a key to long term happiness and trust. Tell him you love his butt and want to make it a happy butt, any way you can. Tell him you want to give him oral, but can make the experience 1000 times better, if he wants, by him letting you play with his butt.

Ideally, you want to get a well manicured finger, and slide it in with oodles of lube, then, from the inside, go up as if you are trying to touch the inside of his belly button. You will feel something that feels like and is shaped and sized like a walnut shell. That is the prostate. Rub it GENTLY. Press it GENTLY, while giving him oral. He will have an orgasm like never before.

If you are daring, take a shower together and give him some kisses and licks back there. Tell him you would love it for him to reciprocate. I bet he will.

From there, the sky is the limit. We do toys, pegging, you name it, but honestly, he still thinks my finger in his butt is the best toy ever.

I keep one finger manicured short and smooth at all times, just for him. Just for that. He is driven wild just holding my hand daily, knowing my finger is that way...just for him. What a constant reminder and turn on.

Indulge your hubby's wishes and maybe he can indulge yours???!!!!

The anus is full of happy nerves...in men and woman. It would be such ashamed to not make full use of them, eh? Life is way too short to deny pleasure that is so, so easy to come by.
11/11/2012
Bignuf Bignuf
Mr. Bignuf here. Since you say in an earlier post you are happy to hear from a guy. Let me tell you, early in dating I had a sweet girl introduce me to the pleasure of giving and getting anal attention. I have not had a girlfriend since that was not into this. After decades of happy as a clam marriage to Mrs. Bignuf, I can tell you, when a guy gets this kind of awesome loving and attention from his wife, he has zero reason to cheat or wander. Great sex sure helps make for a great marriage. The fact he felt comfortable enough to confide this in you, if he is shy, is a powerful message of "please do this for me" and to ignore it would be a big mistake. Both of you can get a big "win/win" here. Have fun.
11/11/2012
Incendiaire Incendiaire
The best way is just to start playing around back there during oral sex. Touch the outside, slowly slip a finger in, then work up to other things gradually. Once he gets used to in being incorporated into your sex activities together he'll feel less awkward, and you'll be pegging in no time.
11/11/2012
RonLee RonLee
If you are going to penetrate, even with just a finger, don't forget lube.
11/11/2012
MidnightStorm MidnightStorm
Just make sure you take it slow and easy!
11/12/2012
comatose-kitty comatose-kitty
I would say lots of lube, start with fingers and a few small toys
11/12/2012
Robespierrethecat Robespierrethecat
The way my boyfriend and I got started with anal play is that I would finger him a bit while going down on him.
11/12/2012
no longer here no longer here
Wish we had seen this last night when Mr was on. This is fairly new to us. He realized he liked anal play because of a misplaced vibrator one night. From there we have moved to fingers. Next step was his Aneros Helix Syn, Mrs researched prostate play and toys and this is what we decided on together. If you read our review you'll see how much he LOVED it! Next we moved to plugs and pegging.

This has added to our physical as well as emotional closeness. It's wonderful that we can be so open with each other about what we enjoy without fear of judgement.

HAVE FUN! feel free to message us if you want to chat!
11/12/2012
Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by Incendiaire
The best way is just to start playing around back there during oral sex. Touch the outside, slowly slip a finger in, then work up to other things gradually. Once he gets used to in being incorporated into your sex activities together he'll feel ... More
Pegging is a big leap, but digital play during oral is sure a good start.
11/12/2012
Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by comatose-kitty
I would say lots of lube, start with fingers and a few small toys
Exactly. The toy called "key to your butt" is a good, small starter toy for this kind of play, by the way.
11/12/2012
Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by MidnightStorm
Just make sure you take it slow and easy!
Yes indeed. That is important. So is lots and lots of good lube.
11/12/2012
Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by RonLee
If you are going to penetrate, even with just a finger, don't forget lube.
I will add to to that, if you are going to punctuate with any kisses or even more "advanced" loving (like licks), then you may want to get one of the amazing fruit flavored lubes here on EF. They smell and taste amazing, and some are super slick for good anal fun.
11/12/2012
Trysexual Trysexual
All of the above.
11/12/2012
Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
You start with external massage - go to fingers for penetration - then see where it takes you. With time, experience and some great orgasms - I'm sure he'll be less awkward.

And as always - plenty of lube.
11/12/2012
RonLee RonLee
If you are adventurous enough to go there, I'd recommend rimming.
Though my partner still has some trepidation about being clean enough even after washing, I really do enjoy giving it to her. In my experience, it also really does help to relax the recipient of anal penetration.
11/12/2012
Luca77 Luca77
Communication is also key. I forgot to put this in my first post. I had the whole "surprise finger" done to me during my second blowjob I ever got. It shocked me but wasn't bad. So as it is said in a great movie "I'm giving you the choice *cinematic pause* I never had." It'll develop from there!
11/12/2012
DashO'Roark DashO'Roark
Quote:
Originally posted by Robespierrethecat
The way my boyfriend and I got started with anal play is that I would finger him a bit while going down on him.
I have to agree. That is the best way.
Try curling your finger and stroke the front of his rectum about finger deep to stimulate his prostate. Trust me; he'll ask for more...
11/13/2012
Total posts: 22
Unique posters: 13