Asking for anal play

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Asking for anal play

giggle giggle
How did you first ask your partner for this, especially males asking females?
05/18/2013
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Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
Well I spent over 23 years 'suggesting' anal play to an obviously very reluctant partner. Now that she finally agreed - it has become almost routine. I'm obviously one that didn't push hard - but in light of the results, it's clear I did not push hard enough.

The biggest surprise to my wife is that she actually finds pleasure in it.

I would do some research on the many anal sex threads on EF and use the enthusiastic comments made by women as proof that when done right anal sex can be positive for both partners - even to the point of orgasm.

After warming up my wife with my fingers and a tapered vibe, I'll enter her (using a ton of silicone lube) and give her a clit vibe that uses while I slowly increase the speed and depth of penetration. About 1/2 the time she will have an orgasm this way.

I also suggest that she do anal play on you. This has 2 advantages. 1st and foremost you can experience what she will be feeling and getting an understanding of the need for - and methods of warming up and the importance of pausing after penetration to allow for the anus to adjust.

Secondly it will show her that you are getting pleasure from it - hopefully from this she relates this to her own ability to both accept anal penetration and enjoy it.

I'd say we had regular anal play and penetration on me for a year before she warmed up to the idea of trying it out herself.
05/18/2013
joiedejouets joiedejouets
When I realized I wanted to get into anal, I quite literally called up the person I wanted to do the deed and said "I want to try anal; will you put it up my butt?"


That's how I asked for anal. I think people overanalyze these things at times - Or maybe I'm just blunt about these sorts of things. No use beating around the bush. If you want your partner to do something, Ask them! That's what a partnership is about; Having an open line of communication.
05/18/2013
MrWill MrWill
Nearly verbatim from the conversation I had with the first woman I let play with my ass: "Hey babe, you know that g-spot toy you have? I've been reading about the prostate and I really want to get on my knees and let you stick it in my ass. I'll tell you if it is too much, so you don't have to worry about hurting me."

Her reply: "ARE YOU SERIOUS?" (While she was already lubing the toy)


As time passed we tried most of her toys in my ass, and she even got more comfortable with me playing with/fucking her ass.

Sometimes honesty is the absolute best.. but it will depend on the dynamic between you and the other person!
05/18/2013
geliebt geliebt
As anal is a huge part of what turns both me and my boyfriend on, and as we are both very straightforward with stuff, he'll sometimes just say "hey, we should have anal tonight." Which is usually followed by an "OMG definitely yes!" from me

Works for us!
05/18/2013
Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by giggle
How did you first ask your partner for this, especially males asking females?
Interesting question. Hubby never had to ask a girl. Every one he dated before we got together was an anal pro, and one completely schooled him in the process. I had a few great lovers who turned me into an anal fanatic before we were a couple, so it was always part of our love play.

I know that the first guy who took me back there, simply said, "can I use any part of your body to give you incredible pleasure in ways you never dreamed you could have it"? How could I say "no" to an offer like that.

He started by long, loving oral sex sessions and then after much kissing and licking back there, he introduced a well lubed and very slow moving pinkie finger. The rest is history.
05/19/2013
Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by geliebt
As anal is a huge part of what turns both me and my boyfriend on, and as we are both very straightforward with stuff, he'll sometimes just say "hey, we should have anal tonight." Which is usually followed by an "OMG definitely ...
Love it. I am even more forward then that. I will bend over or do a "Captain Jack" leg up on the couch, and put my finger on, or in, my tush and say, "I want you there...NOW". He gets the message every time.
05/19/2013
Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by joiedejouets
When I realized I wanted to get into anal, I quite literally called up the person I wanted to do the deed and said "I want to try anal; will you put it up my butt?"


That's how I asked for anal. I think people overanalyze ...
Wow...I so love your description of clear, open, non BS communication. Thank you. That kind of talk makes life SO much simpler and with less confusion and far less un-needed drama.
05/19/2013
Thong man Thong man
I experimented with a plug and my wife found it one day. I would use it sometimes while we were messing around. Then one night I had it in, she proceeded to remove it during sex and fingered me.
08/06/2015
MrClark MrClark
It's my opinion that any relationship should be built on a foundation of trust and open communication. Anyway, met my current girlfriend via online dating and in our extended chat sessions it turned out she had no sexual experience of any kind. As I came into the relationship with previous experience was worried if anal play/sex was something I desired on occasion if she'd be open to it with no experience. So we discussed this need of mine openly, and even though she hadn't thought of it previously was excited to meet my needs as much as she was about me meeting hers. And indicated if it's not enjoyable, she'd let me know.

Now we enjoy anal play regularly, but anytime I'm in the mood for anal I basically just ask if she's feeling up for it. This is mostly due to the added prep time we take before we have anal sex.
Apr 23, 6:27 pm
Andykh Andykh
It started with my wife and i one day while I was at work and we were texting back and forth sexy stuff and I started to hinting round bout plugs and strapons. She amazed me when she said ok to both. Now we have both and a prostate massager that she will use on me along with her vibrators that she has for her
Apr 23, 7:19 pm
OH&W, Lovebears OH&W, Lovebears
Quote:
Originally posted by Andykh
It started with my wife and i one day while I was at work and we were texting back and forth sexy stuff and I started to hinting round bout plugs and strapons. She amazed me when she said ok to both. Now we have both and a prostate massager that she ...
Andykh, how is the peg_ _ _ _ g coming long. Will you have a review on the arsenal or equipment used ?
Apr 23, 7:33 pm
Andykh Andykh
Quote:
Originally posted by OH&W, Lovebears
Andykh, how is the peg_ _ _ _ g coming long. Will you have a review on the arsenal or equipment used ?
Well the first time didnt go as planned since dil wouldn't stay in the harness. The next time she was gonna surprise me with the strap on but couldn't figure out the straps on it. Hopefully 3rd time will be the charm. Aa far as a review I believe the strap on is fetish fantasy and purdy much got what I paid for. I didn't want to spend a whole lot but probably could have got a better one for lil bit more money
Apr 23, 7:40 pm
OH&W, Lovebears OH&W, Lovebears
Quote:
Originally posted by Andykh
Well the first time didnt go as planned since dil wouldn't stay in the harness. The next time she was gonna surprise me with the strap on but couldn't figure out the straps on it. Hopefully 3rd time will be the charm. Aa far as a review I ...
Well , if not succeed, try and try again. Unlike baseball, there's no 3 strikes and you're out . Or try a strapless one. Pricey but worth it. Pleasure for giver and receiver. I did a review on the Fun Factory Share. What's good about it is that it starts small but gets girthier. Find it on my review page or go to FF Share here on EF.
Apr 24, 12:04 pm
Andykh Andykh
Quote:
Originally posted by OH&W, Lovebears
Well , if not succeed, try and try again. Unlike baseball, there's no 3 strikes and you're out . Or try a strapless one. Pricey but worth it. Pleasure for giver and receiver. I did a review on the Fun Factory Share. What's good about it ...
Well its still in the arsenal of toys lol. I have looked at some of the strapless and they seem like they would be worth the price and fun
Apr 24, 8:31 pm
Total posts: 15
Unique posters: 10