I agree with everyone else. I love having anal sex, if my bf wanted me to peg him, we could talk about it, but he doesn't and that's fine too.
Do you think that if a guy wants to do anal on a girl it's only fair for him to let the girl peg him back?
Quote:
I don't think "fair" has anything to do with it. Some people enjoy having anal play performed on them, others don't. In many relationships, (I feel like I have said this 100 times) the Power Dynamic only allows one member to be the penetrator.
Originally posted by
rdytogo
Fair is fair and if you want to do it, you shouldn't have any problem doing it as well.
This is how many relationships are. They are based on Power Play, not on an outsider's view of "fairness."
Also, anal is NOT like oral sex in terms of "what is good for the goose is good for the gander." It is very different to have penile/anal sex than to be pegged with an object. One does not equate to the other.
I have yet, in all my years on Earth, seen a single relationship that is "100% fair and 50/50" That isn't what relationships are all about. They are usually about each fulfilling a role and fulfilling the others needs as well as one's own. And one person's needs may not be an others'.
My Man and I have anal sex frequently, but I have never pegged him, played with his asshole, nothing. It has nothing to do with "fair" and everything to do with the dynamic that works itself out in a good relationship.
If the man wants to be pegged, more power to him. But, to say he "has to so it's fair" is ridiculous. A hetero couple can't "equate" either the woman, nor the man's role in PIV sex with any other act, either, does that make it "not fair?"
I just don't get this type of thinking. If anyone has been in a long term relationship, the idea of what is "fair" to those members of the relationship is not what it may seem looking in from the outside.
01/04/2011
Quote:
P'Gell - I luv'ya - but this is your 4th rant with essentially the same message. We get that you are the sub and subs don't peg - but others have a different view.
Originally posted by
P'Gell
I don't think "fair" has anything to do with it. Some people enjoy having anal play performed on them, others don't. In many relationships, (I feel like I have said this 100 times) the Power Dynamic only allows one member to be the
...
I don't think "fair" has anything to do with it. Some people enjoy having anal play performed on them, others don't. In many relationships, (I feel like I have said this 100 times) the Power Dynamic only allows one member to be the penetrator.
This is how many relationships are. They are based on Power Play, not on an outsider's view of "fairness."
Also, anal is NOT like oral sex in terms of "what is good for the goose is good for the gander." It is very different to have penile/anal sex than to be pegged with an object. One does not equate to the other.
I have yet, in all my years on Earth, seen a single relationship that is "100% fair and 50/50" That isn't what relationships are all about. They are usually about each fulfilling a role and fulfilling the others needs as well as one's own. And one person's needs may not be an others'.
My Man and I have anal sex frequently, but I have never pegged him, played with his asshole, nothing. It has nothing to do with "fair" and everything to do with the dynamic that works itself out in a good relationship.
If the man wants to be pegged, more power to him. But, to say he "has to so it's fair" is ridiculous. A hetero couple can't "equate" either the woman, nor the man's role in PIV sex with any other act, either, does that make it "not fair?"
I just don't get this type of thinking. If anyone has been in a long term relationship, the idea of what is "fair" to those members of the relationship is not what it may seem looking in from the outside.
This is how many relationships are. They are based on Power Play, not on an outsider's view of "fairness."
Also, anal is NOT like oral sex in terms of "what is good for the goose is good for the gander." It is very different to have penile/anal sex than to be pegged with an object. One does not equate to the other.
I have yet, in all my years on Earth, seen a single relationship that is "100% fair and 50/50" That isn't what relationships are all about. They are usually about each fulfilling a role and fulfilling the others needs as well as one's own. And one person's needs may not be an others'.
My Man and I have anal sex frequently, but I have never pegged him, played with his asshole, nothing. It has nothing to do with "fair" and everything to do with the dynamic that works itself out in a good relationship.
If the man wants to be pegged, more power to him. But, to say he "has to so it's fair" is ridiculous. A hetero couple can't "equate" either the woman, nor the man's role in PIV sex with any other act, either, does that make it "not fair?"
I just don't get this type of thinking. If anyone has been in a long term relationship, the idea of what is "fair" to those members of the relationship is not what it may seem looking in from the outside.
Let go & let them speak their minds as well.
01/04/2011
hornypoet69
This isn't exactly the same issue, but something similar comes up in the top/bottom dichotomy in gay relationships. While I have never done either, the people who are exclusive tops, or exclusive bottoms don't really make sense to me. It seems like one of the joys of gay sex is that we can experience everything our partner can, so why close yourself off to that? But then I realize things are different for straight couples. And obviously sex shouldn't be about what you are required to do, but rather what you want to do. And if you don't want to do something, then you shouldn't be pressured into it. It might be worth examining why you don't want to do it, to see if maybe there are fears that can be overcome.
01/04/2011
I disagree with many of you in some respect. I DO think fair has a LOT to do with it. This does not mean that I would expect to peg every guy who I let "What what in my butt" but I am comfortable with anal and do not have any inclination towards pegging.
Essentially I believe that if you would like something of your partner you need to discuss it with them. If somebody requested I try something new, it would go a long way with me if they were as willing to try it as they would like me to be. This doesn't mean it will happen, but I don't think it is fair to expect something of your partner that you would be unwilling to attempt yourself. Oral is a good example. If you wont go down on me, there is no way in hell I am going to do it for you.
Of course some relationships do not revolve around equality in that respect. D/S and M/S relationships in particular.
Pegging and organic anal ARE different, however the premise is the same, something foreign is being stuck into an orifice that is, for the sake of this argument, virginal.
Essentially I believe that if you would like something of your partner you need to discuss it with them. If somebody requested I try something new, it would go a long way with me if they were as willing to try it as they would like me to be. This doesn't mean it will happen, but I don't think it is fair to expect something of your partner that you would be unwilling to attempt yourself. Oral is a good example. If you wont go down on me, there is no way in hell I am going to do it for you.
Of course some relationships do not revolve around equality in that respect. D/S and M/S relationships in particular.
Pegging and organic anal ARE different, however the premise is the same, something foreign is being stuck into an orifice that is, for the sake of this argument, virginal.
01/04/2011
I'm with Mistress Kay on this one. There's no "should". If the girl doesn't want or enjoy anal, she shouldn't do it. Same goes for guys. Just because one partner enjoys receiving doesn't mean the other will, nor should they feel pressured to.
That said, I think a lot of guys would be willing to make the trade.
That said, I think a lot of guys would be willing to make the trade.
01/05/2011
Quote:
I think it would be polite to offer, but everyone has their preferences. As long as both people are in agreement with what they want to do or not do, then it's not a problem if it's one sided. Some women don't want anal play in any way, shape, or form (like my wife), but still enjoy the other way around on occasion. So, I don't see why the opposite couldn't be true too.
Originally posted by
PonyPlay
If a guy want to do anal on a girl do you think he should let her do anal to him?
01/05/2011
Obviously there are many different opinions. I feel that there should be a willingness to try things out of fairness. If a girl doesn't love anal but lets her guy do it, he should be willing to be pegged in return if she asks. Trust and comfort are major factors. Some men feel like they are less of a man if something goes in their butt. I think if you are comfortable enough to be inside someone else's body you should be comfortable enough to let them put a little something in you for a while.
A penis and vagina are built to go together, but a butt is a butt. If you love to fill other's you should know what it feels like to be filled. It may make you a better lover.
A penis and vagina are built to go together, but a butt is a butt. If you love to fill other's you should know what it feels like to be filled. It may make you a better lover.
01/06/2011
Quote:
Yeah, I know. But, sometimes people post without reading the entire thread.
Originally posted by
Gunsmoke
P'Gell - I luv'ya - but this is your 4th rant with essentially the same message. We get that you are the sub and subs don't peg - but others have a different view.
Let go & let them speak their minds as well.
Let go & let them speak their minds as well.
It's a Thing with me, not necessarily my message (I had no idea I posted that many times, LOL!) but the posting without reading what other people have already said.
01/06/2011
Quote:
We love hearing from you - keep'm coming
Originally posted by
P'Gell
Yeah, I know. But, sometimes people post without reading the entire thread.
It's a Thing with me, not necessarily my message (I had no idea I posted that many times, LOL!) but the posting without reading what other people have already ...
It's a Thing with me, not necessarily my message (I had no idea I posted that many times, LOL!) but the posting without reading what other people have already ...
Yeah, I know. But, sometimes people post without reading the entire thread.
It's a Thing with me, not necessarily my message (I had no idea I posted that many times, LOL!) but the posting without reading what other people have already said.
It's a Thing with me, not necessarily my message (I had no idea I posted that many times, LOL!) but the posting without reading what other people have already said.
01/06/2011
Doug1956
My gal enjoys anal immensely on occasion, but not all the time. She also enjoys taking me with her Feeldoe once and a while when the mood strikes. Like her I need to be in the right mood and she needs to be patient, but hey what's good for the goose is good for the gander. She really surprised me (and herself) when she realized that she also enjoyed dp...quite frankly I was shocked (happily so...lol). Anyway, it works for us, but may not be for everyone of course. To each his/her own.
01/22/2011
i think if someone isn't willing to reciprocate the same exact act and at least try it once then you shouldn't give it to them (unless you really want to)... unless they had a really good reason i wouldn't put up with it. Unfortunately many guys probably won't agree with that statement or want to be pegged in exchange for anal
02/06/2011
Quote:
If #1 was the case, then anal sex would be suppressed back into the closet again.
Originally posted by
PonyPlay
If a guy want to do anal on a girl do you think he should let her do anal to him?
Even men who want it most of the time need to be seduced into it because of social barriers around men and their asses. It's still viewed as gay to get a blowjob with a finger in the ass.
02/28/2011
Quote:
You are totally right. If it feels good do it....if it's ment to happen it will.
Originally posted by
Kayla
There's no "should" in this case. That's how uncomfortable relationships start. If the person is comfortable with it, then yes, it could be done. But if the person is uncomfortable, there should be no pressure to do it. Same to be
...
There's no "should" in this case. That's how uncomfortable relationships start. If the person is comfortable with it, then yes, it could be done. But if the person is uncomfortable, there should be no pressure to do it. Same to be said with both male or female.
04/01/2011
Quote:
thats our bed rule. My partner has never asked to do anal, but I always tell him I am going to get a strap on. So we have the rule, if one person wants to do anal, then the other party gets too also. Only fair.
Originally posted by
PonyPlay
If a guy want to do anal on a girl do you think he should let her do anal to him?
04/11/2011