Fingering A Man 101 for someone who's never attempted it

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Fingering A Man 101 for someone who's never attempted it

Vnessa Vnessa
(Blushing....hard) Ok, so this is something I would like to try on Mr.Mans, should he be comfortable enough to let me. We havrn'the really approached the idea of this kind of play, but, I don't want to bring up something that I don't even know how to begin with him.

So, my question to the forum is: Men/Women, what do you normally do for your partners (or what have your partners done for YOU)?

I obviously don't want to be a "chump" in this area and I would at least like to know sort of what to do to make it gooood. One thing that concerns me is my long nails. Is this going to be an issue? I've also heard about finger cots, which I think would make ME more comfortable. Thoughts ??

Thanks, luvs
02/21/2015
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OH&W, Lovebears OH&W, Lovebears
Quote:
Originally posted by Vnessa
(Blushing....hard) Ok, so this is something I would like to try on Mr.Mans, should he be comfortable enough to let me. We havrn'the really approached the idea of this kind of play, but, I don't want to bring up something that I don't ...
Being the wind bag I am and a fan of Prostate stimulation. I'm going to answer in several parts.

V, no need to blush. I've learned from the forum there's plenty of couples that enjoy stimulating Mr.'s back door. It is taboo for a many hetero men. However once experienced, come back for more and more.

Yes, fingering is the first stage, then plugs, then P massagers like the Aneros products or the Eden Prostimulator VX1. Then powered devices like the Lelo Billy. If Mr. Mans still enjoys it and wants more, progress to the Fun Factory Drei. When that euphoria/ thrill wears off those then it's time for pegging. To us the latter is the ultimate act of love/commitment between a husband and wife. Brings even soul mates even closer.

Perhaps you can have him read the thread you have started here. I think you will get a few replies.

We will have review on the FF Share out soon. It's one or our faves for the act.
02/21/2015
OH&W, Lovebears OH&W, Lovebears
Quote:
Originally posted by Vnessa
(Blushing....hard) Ok, so this is something I would like to try on Mr.Mans, should he be comfortable enough to let me. We havrn'the really approached the idea of this kind of play, but, I don't want to bring up something that I don't ...
Fingering is a starting place. If you really want to do it, you may have to have a dedicated trimmed nail. Small sacrifice it you really want to please your man. Of course easy for us men to say. I know women love long nails. At least Ow does.

Enough lube to get it in, not too much or it will give him a yucky feeling. Or try a finger/clot glove with lubricant on it. If he is receptive add more lube to go deeper or to rub the prostate.

Now how to get it in? Either straight up ask him if he is willing to try it. Maybe do some anal play with toys yourself and let him know what u r doing. Then ask if he would like to try it.

Perhaps tell him you heard there are more nerves and sensory ending in the rectum and more and more men are getting into it.

Or while going down on him and getting him really excited, slip your finger in super slowly. Sneak it in like how he sneaks toys into you. More sucking then fingering at this point. If no complains go for it !

One day if he gets into using plugs, give him some oral. The combo is fantastic ! I'm sure others will vouch for this combination. If he enjoys that then use the Njoy Pure Wand on him while giving him oral.

If he's not receptive to P stimulation at this time. No worries. And remember "Rome was not built in a day."

The worse that can happen is he will tell you, "Your're spending too much time on EF !" "Too many crazy ideas !"
02/21/2015
Vnessa Vnessa
Quote:
Originally posted by OH&W, Lovebears
Being the wind bag I am and a fan of Prostate stimulation. I'm going to answer in several parts.

V, no need to blush. I've learned from the forum there's plenty of couples that enjoy stimulating Mr.'s back door. It is taboo for ...
Thank you, luv! Soooo, how do I ask this exactly? Obviously, a man's hole is nothing like a woman's vag in the aspect of finger play, so, (umm) am I going for the same technique here?? I just don't know what to go for. Maybe there's a video lol
02/21/2015
Vnessa Vnessa
Quote:
Originally posted by OH&W, Lovebears
Fingering is a starting place. If you really want to do it, you may have to have a dedicated trimmed nail. Small sacrifice it you really want to please your man. Of course easy for us men to say. I know women love long nails. At least Ow ...
OK. I think I can manage that . Baby steps. I don't see him diving right in anyways. So, it will probably be just a little finger testing to see if he's "down" for more.

I will have to look up the wand!
02/21/2015
OH&W, Lovebears OH&W, Lovebears
Quote:
Originally posted by Vnessa
OK. I think I can manage that . Baby steps. I don't see him diving right in anyways. So, it will probably be just a little finger testing to see if he's "down" for more.

I will have to look up the wand!
That Wand in a "What if you could only bring one toy " won. Great for G spot and anal stimulation. Will last forever. (unless u stratch it up)

I think playing Doctor is a good way to get into it. Doctor fantasies ! Forgot to put that in Symb's thread !
02/21/2015
Vnessa Vnessa
Quote:
Originally posted by OH&W, Lovebears
That Wand in a "What if you could only bring one toy " won. Great for G spot and anal stimulation. Will last forever. (unless u stratch it up)

I think playing Doctor is a good way to get into it. Doctor fantasies ! Forgot to put ...
Good to know . I found d it and was able to set up a notification for when it becomes available. Wooooweee
02/21/2015
Vnessa Vnessa
Soooo....I was just playfully touching Mr. Man's private area as he came strolling into the kitchen, he laughed (being ticklish and all), which made me giggle and I said playfully, "I'm going to give you a special massage later". He then says, as he's still laughing, "oh geez, I just hope it doesn't end in me saying, why would you do that!". I lost it and busted out laughing. He knows me so well
02/21/2015
Inquisitor Inquisitor
Vnessa, earlier you mentioned your nails. They aren't long are they? If they are, finger cots will be Greatly appreciated. You can also use Latex gloves with cotton balls stuffed into the finger tips if you have long manicured nails and are concerned about them.

As for a movie you can watch to become more informed, you might want to check out Tristan Taorimino's Expert Guide To Anal Pleasure for Men.
02/21/2015
Vnessa Vnessa
Quote:
Originally posted by Inquisitor
Vnessa, earlier you mentioned your nails. They aren't long are they? If they are, finger cots will be Greatly appreciated. You can also use Latex gloves with cotton balls stuffed into the finger tips if you have long manicured nails and are ...
They're a little long (let's see if this works lol)
02/21/2015
Vnessa Vnessa
Ha! Nothing like a super sized finger shot geesh, it could have been smaller lol Anywho, that's my nail length .

I will probably do the little finger cots. Just because I think it will make me more comfortable. The movie idea is great. I think I need that!
02/21/2015
RonLee RonLee
I try to keep my nails short and smooth and my Baby still feels them when I finger her backdoor. Hers are sort of like yours Vnessa, and so she just won't finger me. Nobody wants an ER visit because of a wrong move in the bedroom.
02/22/2015
symbiasin symbiasin
Quote:
Originally posted by RonLee
I try to keep my nails short and smooth and my Baby still feels them when I finger her backdoor. Hers are sort of like yours Vnessa, and so she just won't finger me. Nobody wants an ER visit because of a wrong move in the bedroom.
I used to watch 'Sex sent me to the ER', so now I keep wodering when something comes up like what RonLee said 'How would you ever explain how cuts and splinters got in the backdoor?' Yea I was rolling on the floor laughing my ass off when it just happened.
02/22/2015
symbiasin symbiasin
I have a good idea for a thread (lets hope)
02/22/2015
Vnessa Vnessa
Quote:
Originally posted by RonLee
I try to keep my nails short and smooth and my Baby still feels them when I finger her backdoor. Hers are sort of like yours Vnessa, and so she just won't finger me. Nobody wants an ER visit because of a wrong move in the bedroom.
I definitely don't want to hurt him. Do you think a finger cot would help? I could bring down my length a touch but I would like to keep a little .
02/22/2015
Inquisitor Inquisitor
Quote:
Originally posted by Vnessa
Ha! Nothing like a super sized finger shot geesh, it could have been smaller lol Anywho, that's my nail length .

I will probably do the little finger cots. Just because I think it will make me more comfortable. The movie idea is great. I ...
I would definitely recommend the gloves with cotton balls combo. BTW, nice manicure, are you a gel girl or acrylic type of lady?
02/22/2015
OH&W, Lovebears OH&W, Lovebears
Quote:
Originally posted by Vnessa
They're a little long (let's see if this works lol)
Yikes, maybe look into purchasing the Lelo Billy. It's like a finger.

Or use your your big toe. Lol, Maybe one of you will develop or have a hidden foot fetish.

Ok before you try to throw you shoe at me, just joking around. I wouldn't want that nail in me ! I already complain when she scratches me accidentally.
02/22/2015
Vnessa Vnessa
Quote:
Originally posted by Inquisitor
I would definitely recommend the gloves with cotton balls combo. BTW, nice manicure, are you a gel girl or acrylic type of lady?
Thank you

I'm an Acrylics type of a girl. They're a little Stronger.

OK cotton balls with gloves. I'm in! Ha..kinda funny
02/22/2015
Vnessa Vnessa
Quote:
Originally posted by OH&W, Lovebears
Yikes, maybe look into purchasing the Lelo Billy. It's like a finger.

Or use your your big toe. Lol, Maybe one of you will develop or have a hidden foot fetish.

Ok before you try to throw you shoe at me, just joking around. I ...
LOL LOL LOL. Sissy. . I understand, sensitive area and all.

I saw the Billy. I think it was one that I ended up placing in my wish list. Was that the lelo you did a review on?? I will double check my little 'Treasures To Consider'
02/22/2015
Inquisitor Inquisitor
Quote:
Originally posted by Vnessa
LOL LOL LOL. Sissy. . I understand, sensitive area and all.

I saw the Billy. I think it was one that I ended up placing in my wish list. Was that the lelo you did a review on?? I will double check my little 'Treasures To Consider'
Is your wish list public? I'm always looking for a unique good toy.
02/22/2015
Vnessa Vnessa
Quote:
Originally posted by Inquisitor
Is your wish list public? I'm always looking for a unique good toy.
It is it's on my About Me. I need to update it. I'm sure lots have been discontinued and we're added when I very first joined.
02/22/2015
Inquisitor Inquisitor
Quote:
Originally posted by Vnessa
It is it's on my About Me. I need to update it. I'm sure lots have been discontinued and we're added when I very first joined.
Ok, I think I'm doing something wrong. When I clicked on your list, it takes me to mine.
02/22/2015
OH&W, Lovebears OH&W, Lovebears
Quote:
Originally posted by Vnessa
LOL LOL LOL. Sissy. . I understand, sensitive area and all.

I saw the Billy. I think it was one that I ended up placing in my wish list. Was that the lelo you did a review on?? I will double check my little 'Treasures To Consider'
Yes, I did a review on the Lelo Billy. Still loving it ! And females can use it also. So nothing to lose and everything to gain. You can find it on my page. Don't be fooled by it's slim size. It's great !. Might be perfect for your virgin hubbie. (after your finger introduction of course.)

Have fun !
02/22/2015
Vnessa Vnessa
Quote:
Originally posted by Inquisitor
Ok, I think I'm doing something wrong. When I clicked on your list, it takes me to mine.
Ok....that's just too weird. We may have lots in common but I'm pretty sure you don't want the hot pink boots shorts i Saved. Jk.I don't have lingerie on there lol

I will check it out after a bit
02/22/2015
Vnessa Vnessa
Quote:
Originally posted by OH&W, Lovebears
Yes, I did a review on the Lelo Billy. Still loving it ! And females can use it also. So nothing to lose and everything to gain. You can find it on my page. Don't be fooled by it's slim size. It's great !. Might be perfect for your virgin ...
Thanks, luv! That's the one I added then for him there was another one I added also that doesn't vibrate and is more of a plug'is style. It mentioned prostate massager. Sounded good
02/22/2015
OH&W, Lovebears OH&W, Lovebears
Quote:
Originally posted by Vnessa
Thanks, luv! That's the one I added then for him there was another one I added also that doesn't vibrate and is more of a plug'is style. It mentioned prostate massager. Sounded good
If he gets into P massage let me know. There's a combo (2 toys) that will knock his socks off ! And one of the items you would love also. And he nor you have to lift a finger. Just don't fight over them.
02/27/2015
Vnessa Vnessa
Quote:
Originally posted by OH&W, Lovebears
If he gets into P massage let me know. There's a combo (2 toys) that will knock his socks off ! And one of the items you would love also. And he nor you have to lift a finger. Just don't fight over them.
I'm all 'eyes'. It never fails though, All the good toys are always out of stock. Im on wait list for probably 5 right now
02/27/2015
OH&W, Lovebears OH&W, Lovebears
Quote:
Originally posted by Vnessa
I'm all 'eyes'. It never fails though, All the good toys are always out of stock. Im on wait list for probably 5 right now
Vnessa, You must be psychic or have ESP ! How did you know the Drei was one of the toys in the "Knock his Socks Off" combo ?
02/27/2015
Vnessa Vnessa
Quote:
Originally posted by OH&W, Lovebears
Vnessa, You must be psychic or have ESP ! How did you know the Drei was one of the toys in the "Knock his Socks Off" combo ?
Its a gift lol. And I pay attention when it matters. I had a feeling the Drei might be one. It caught my eye when I was catching up on your awesome reviews. Now...number 2???
02/28/2015
Bignuf Bignuf
All the advice given here seems pretty good, but let me add, as a huge fan of directly stimulating my hubby's prostate during oral (it is the strongest orgasm he ever gets), I keep one fingernail actually cut totally short (still painted and pretty), just for that reason. That alone is a huge turn on to him, since looking at (or kissing) my hand, or holding my hand when walking (yes, we still do that, after years of marriage), he is aware of that short nail and that it is there just for his pleasure! It is a constant reminder of my love for him and his pleasure, and as such he does things to remind me of how much he loves me and my pleasure as well.
As for the actual activity. Just use lots of lube, and insert slowly and gently, and listen to him tell you if he is comfortable with your attention. I don't know how much you feel about what is, and isn't in your comfort zone, but after a nice shower, I will gladly kiss and lick him back there to set the tone for my finger as well. He loves it and likewise does the same for me.
When your aim is to stimulate his prostate, think of your finger heading right toward his belly button from inside. You will then find the prostate which will feel like the outside of a walnut shell, only spongy like a ripe peach. Some men like it pressed then released, lightly, over and over. Others like it rubbed. My hubby loves it rubbed round and round by my fingertip. If I want, I can make him cum...hard, in under a minute with that finger motion.

Anyway, best wishes, and have lots of fun.

Oh...I never use gloves or "finger cots". If someone does not have to have a bowel movement, the rectum is usually pretty darned clean. Even the anus is clean (we shave there, and wash it with a finger...together, in the shower. A great warm up to anal play).
We always have a tub of Wet One's at the bedside for clean up of penis, toys or fingers, right after they have been inside our rectums, and we have never had any issues because of that. We have also never had any "soiling" found, if that helps.
02/28/2015
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