How do I interest a reluctant partner

Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
I've read so much about the pleasures of anal sex - even intense anal orgasms. Any advice on how to 'entice' a reluctant partner? She gives great head and we use dozens of vibes and dildos to get her off. She's fine with me rimming her or even sliding between her cheeks - but she pushes me away at even a hint of penetration - even with just a finger or small vibe. Any ideas from the experienced anal sex community?
07/25/2009
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Undressed Reviews Undressed Reviews
Quote:
Originally posted by Gunsmoke
I've read so much about the pleasures of anal sex - even intense anal orgasms. Any advice on how to 'entice' a reluctant partner? She gives great head and we use dozens of vibes and dildos to get her off. She's fine with me rimming ... More
It would help to know where her apprehension comes from because understanding the 'why' can help you both come to terms with her feelings about anal sex.

Has she had a really bad experience in the past?
Is she afraid there will be a lot of pain?
Does it gross her out?
Is she worried about there being an "uncomfortable" smell?
Are there special circumstances that might make it more painful for her?
Are there health concerns?

There are so many issues that might interfere with her desire.

Take it slow and try to be supportive, rather than simply trying to get her to change her mind (not an accusation, by the way). Maybe if she seems to be coming around to it, you two can read or watch a pornographic film together. (I would suggest Tristan Taormino for a book OR film.) The more you confront this together, the more comfortable she may become.

If she agrees to it, (1) warm her up slowly and carefully, (2) ask her how she feels and if she's ready for another finger/larger toy/you, (3) make sure you use a good, thick lubricant. Anal sex doesn't have to be really painful.

Good luck to you both.
07/26/2009
Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
Quote:
Originally posted by Undressed Reviews
It would help to know where her apprehension comes from because understanding the 'why' can help you both come to terms with her feelings about anal sex.

Has she had a really bad experience in the past?
Is she afraid there will be ... More
Thanks for the hints - She has actually agreed to try in the past - but the words have never come to action. It's been 20 years, so I don't think patience is the issue. I expect that I need to find out more about why she's so reluctant.
07/26/2009
Total posts: 3
Unique posters: 2