I have a new cock! (Strap - on advice)

Dragon Dragon
I have a new cock! I'm talking about my first strap on with a dildo. I know that a lot of you have played with strap-ons before and anal sex. I love anal sex, but most of the time I understand it from the receiving end. I know my tastes, preferences and what I've learned. I know that LUBE is essential (well - it's not, but for a beginner it is!)

For a man that wants to experience being fucked for the first time by a woman with a strap on, and has only had limited anal sex experience what type of advice can you give. This includes positions, etc.
06/19/2009
  • Luxury To People: Save 20% on Select Designer Brands
  • Better Price Sale - Save 60%
  • Better Price Sale - Save 70%
  • Free Attachments with Fairy Mini. Save $21.99

    • FREE attachments
      Free attachments
    • Fairy Mini
    Get a Free 3 attachment set

    Expires on Oct 28, 2015 at 5pm ET Terms

  • Better Price Sale - Save 50%
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
All promotions
ScottA ScottA
I hope that I can use this advice as the basis of a blog post on bottomtalk... but here goes.

Lube: make sure that he's not sensitive to anything in the lube. Try it before hand, at least several hours beforehand, so you've got time to swap lubes if necessary and the burning feeling can fade.

Lube: make sure you get it up inside to start with. I don't know what exactly happens physiologically, but once things really get going my butt somehow seems to start to produce some sort of lubricating mucus, but until then you want to make sure that the lube doesn't get squeegeed off at the anus.

Play with your chosen dildo and harness beforehand. See how it hangs, any funny moves that will detach it, etc. I greatly prefer a toy with a curve in it, because it (a) stimulates much better and (b) seems to find its way inside much easier. That's just personal preference, though.

FOREPLAY!!! Take plenty of time with fingers, hand-held toys, tongues (kitchen plastic wrap makes a good barrier), etc. to make sure he's relaxed. Play around with his cock, too, because if he's horny it's easier and feels better. All of this foreplay doesn't excuse you from going slow at insertion, though - he's going to tighten up, especially this time because it's a new sensation.

If possible, warm up the dildo. It makes it easier to relax and accept it.

DON'T play with his dick while you're inserting! It's very hard for me not to clench my ass when someone's playing with my cock, and you don't want that when you're trying to mount him.

Push in slowly, with as many pauses as necessary, and then just wait. Kiss him, rub his body, etc. You can play with his cock a bit now.

Long and slow strokes to start - find where his magic spots are inside.

Talk to him. Tell him how sexy this is, what you like about it - remember guys often like that kind of stuff.

Positions: To start with it's definitely one of two: doggy style (make sure he's kneeling on something soft, but a bed might be too wobbly) or him-on-his-back-legs-i n-the-air/on your shoulders missionary. I've improvised a "sit sling" from time to time that helps hold the legs up without muscle strain. Try to do whatever it takes to let him relax as much as possible, because there's much more pleasure when you're relaxed.

You've settled on a dildo by now, but I strongly recommend a double. It's easier to "drive" and gives you more fun, too.

Be willing to stop when he gets worn out/sore/tired. If you do it right he'll want to come back.
06/19/2009
ScottA ScottA
Oh, also - if he's worried about mess then he'll tense up and it won't be as much fun. I also have had problems with stuff from the rectum getting on toys and irritating the anus - not fun.

Do a "dry run" with a toy to see if he's empty, if he isn't then he can try to use the toilet. If he's concerned, or if there's stuff still up there, you might want to try either a SMALL enema (anal douche) or a glycerin suppository just to make sure. Let things settle down for an hour or two afterwards.
06/19/2009
Peg Peg
You might want to consider lighting from the stand point of getting use to position and lining things up. Being able to see where things are while you talk through your first few times will be an added benefit. Just curious what combo did yo go with?
06/20/2009
Not Here Anymore f/k/a Happy Lady Not Here Anymore f/k/a Happy Lady
I'm not as familiar with harnessing up for anal sex - but I can tell contribute that you need to really get your harness set so that it is comfortable for you well before you start. I would strap it on, with the dildo in place, and (assuming it's not a double dildo), roughly "jerk off" with the dildo. This is so that you can see where the pressure of the base of the dildo is going to hit you. I find if I don't get the harness/dildo positioned just right, I start having a LOT of pain when things really get going.
06/20/2009
Total posts: 5
Unique posters: 4