Virgin Curious about Orgasms.

ColorSplash ColorSplash
I have never had an orgasm before. I am a inexperienced virgin. Before coming on this site I tried touching, rubbing, and basically everything you can do with fingers. I inserted a finger a few times. I never really felt much of anything, I didnt even cum or make a noise.

Recently, I sort of got my mom to give me her credit card so I could buy a few things on here. Shes against it, she thinks that it will effect me when I get a partner. I picked the Speeding bullets hollow points, Dolphin teaser, kissa, Silicone bunny buddy, and the before and after toy cleaner. I tried out all the vibrators but the one that worked best was the speeding bullet. The vibration was good but I didnt really make a noise like before. I felt the vibration and my clit was sensitive since I moved the bullet around. The kissa was too big it would not enter. I did come a little with all the vibrations and the different settings but I didnt moan at all.. it was dead silence except for my breathing that did increase.

I am not really sure what to do to have a orgasm. I want that leg shaking.. body moving..moaning experience that people have. Do people have to moan when they have an orgasm? How? What can I do to get one? Are there any products that will help me? Also, does toys have an effect on you when you have a lover?
02/28/2011
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potstickers potstickers
I'd imagine the Kissa to be far too large for a virgin.
You don't need to make noise to enjoy stimulation. Orgasms are different for everyone. Some people make no noise, some people make a lot. The more you practice, the more you'll know how to please yourself and find what works for you.
And likely, the more you know your own body, the better sex will be with your partner.

Keep trying!
02/28/2011
Happy Camper Happy Camper
Do not be discouraged! I started reviewing toys for EF as a virgin who was having trouble getting myself to orgasm.

I would imagine that the kissa would be way too large. I had trouble with 1 1/4" inches as it were during my virgin state. I would try and stay under 1 1/4" and maybe invest in a toy that you can aim for your g-spot with. It's not a goldmine for everyone, but I kept trying to work with my clit and it took me a long time to discover that my g-spot was way more sensitive than my clit (which is pretty much invulnerable practically everything including the Hitachi).

I had been using toys for about two years when I met my partner and it was actually with him that I experienced my first orgasm. Toys can't replace that experience with a partner and I wouldn't worry too much about becoming desensitized or any nonsense like that.

As far as earth-shattering orgasms...I find they rarely turn out to be that way. Arousal for me is so much better than an orgasm and I've had plenty of quiet masturbation sessions as well as a lot of loud sex. I definitely think it helps when you have a partner because you're feeding off each others energies and the things they do can take you surprise which is unfortunately something that is hard to replicate when we're playing with ourselves. I'm not trying to tell you to rush out and find a partner, but to enjoy the time you have with yourself and to not feel any pressure. Although I can definitely understand the desire and frustration as someone who learned how to orgasm later than most of my friends did.
02/28/2011
jjonk jjonk
u sound like my ex nomatter how good it felt to her she made no noice so i think that some girls just dont
03/01/2011
indiglo indiglo
Yeah, everyone is different. Not everyone makes noise, and making noise is not a requirement to have an orgasm. Also, IME, age made a big difference for me in that department. In my late teens and early 20's orgasms were really hard for me to come by with or without a partner. I think it was an actual physiological thing, like my body just wasn't able to orgasm yet. It just takes time to find out what works for you, and even once you know what works for you, you still have to learn how to use each new toy you get. But you won't become desensitized or anything like that, and for me, it's always better with my partner than on my own.

Also, not all orgasms are earth shattering/leg shaking/body moving. Some are little and barely there, some are just average, and some are so intense you kind of lose it for a few minutes or even cry. For me, it's not a function of how much I love my partner, or even how turned on I am, it's just the roll of the dice each time. But each is wonderful in its own way.

So try not to put too much pressure on yourself. Just pay attention to what you're doing and how it FEELS. Not so much your reaction to it, but how it actually FEELS. If it feels good, keep doing it, and if it doesn't keep trying different things until it does feel good. Happy practicing!
03/01/2011
ColorSplash ColorSplash
Thank you all for the great advice. I have been trying. I calmed myself down and just went with it and for the first time ever I made noise. It was a little but it was better than the times before. Maybe not an orgasm but it was the best I've done to myself so far.
03/02/2011
lucymalfoy lucymalfoy
Are you doing anything for visual stimulation? It's important to make sure you're turned on mentally, not just physically
03/12/2011
Total posts: 7
Unique posters: 6