I offered a blowjob to my bf and got turned down, I need some insight.

BlackOrchid BlackOrchid
This has happened a few times. I've offered my boyfriend oral, I made it clear that I wasn't expecting anything in return. And he's turned these offers down. He said it was because he was tired, but on these occasions he's been awake then after that for hours anyway...watching tv, on the internet, or doing random things.
Maybe I'm taking the rejection too hard but I'm having a hard time with understanding it.
Do you think he didn't think I meant it when I said I didn't want anything in return?
Is it wrong for me to feel so rejected by this?
08/07/2013
  • Weekly Special; Buy 1 Vibe, get 1 FREE
  • Save 15% on Luxury Brands
  • Annual Clearance - Save 30%
  • Buy Cascade vibe and save 50% on lubricants!
  • Save 20% on self-lubricating Cascade vibe and sleeve kit
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
All promotions
Bill220 Bill220
I may be in the minority here but I've turned down offers for oral sex from my wife and she gives a killer blow job. Maybe he just wasn't in the mood? That does happen to men on occasion
I wouldn't worry about it or be offended by his declination of your offer.
08/07/2013
BlackOrchid BlackOrchid
WHAT? Sometimes men are not in the mood?
Haha... no.. thanks for your insight. I'll try not to worry about it, I am particularly sensitive to rejection.
08/07/2013
Pete's Princess Pete's Princess
There are several reasons why he may turn it down
He may just not be in the mood for it right then. He may not be tired in the going to sleep sense but may be tired in the not in the right frame of mind for sex way.
He may just not be his favorite. Nothing to do with you, just not his thing.
He may have had some bad experience with oral and be self conscious as a result.

From your post I am not sure if you normally give him oral and turning you down is new. Or if you giving him oral is a new altogether.

It is not wrong to feel rejected. However, if you ask him and he says he is just tired, you should trust that.
08/11/2013
Sincerely Yours, N Sincerely Yours, N
I once dated a guy that simply did not like oral. Shocking, I know, but he said it just felt strange for him. He was fine with everything else, but simply could not stand having me blow him. Everybody has their own preferences, and though guys like that are few and far between, they do exist.
08/12/2013
Rossie Rossie
I agree with what Pete's Princess said. Or, if you really wanted to know why he's not interested, why don't you sit him down and discuss the matter with him in a nice and calm way -- it's better than guessing.
08/12/2013
Bonesdance Bonesdance
I'm pretty sure I've never turned down a blowjob offered by my wife, but she rejects my offers of oral (and other) sex all the time. Some people just aren't horny all the time, and it's nobody's fault. I'm sure he appreciates the offer, even if he's not in the mood to accept it, so don't beat yourself up over it.
08/13/2013
stlouisxxx stlouisxxx
Did you offer to blow him while he is watching tv or on the Internet? There are times when we guys just want to chill out. There are times my fiancée has played with herself on the couch, thankfully for the dvr. I wouldn't take it as a rejection
08/13/2013
Gr8pumpkin Gr8pumpkin
Quote:
Originally posted by stlouisxxx
Did you offer to blow him while he is watching tv or on the Internet? There are times when we guys just want to chill out. There are times my fiancée has played with herself on the couch, thankfully for the dvr. I wouldn't take it as a rejection
There have been times when I have turned down an indirect sexual advance either because I was (very) tired, not really in the mood because of distractions or because I had recently masturbated and I knew I would not get off again so soon. I do not recall EVER turning down a direct " I want to blow you" advance, that in itself might be enough to get me going again, even if I wouldn't necessarily climax, the offer is sweet, and it still would be enjoyable.
Maybe he just WAS tired, or........
Don't give up, or take it as a rejection, unless it gets to be chronic, then ya gotta have a talk.

Have fun.
08/13/2013
freshmonkey freshmonkey
Ive been through the same thing with my husband, ive learned to just let it go, cause if I bring it up he gets annoyed with it cause he already explained to me that he was tired and no where near in the mood..
08/14/2013
Basalt Basalt
Yeah, you never know, but I wouldn't take it personally. People's libidos fluctuate, and can also be dependent on diet, stress, amount of exercise, and other factors. As long as you're happy in the relationship and are satisfied with the sex, I wouldn't read into any particular offers turned down.
08/16/2013
babyrock babyrock
he's probably not in the mood. just try again. don't make a big deal out of it with him. he may not want to "talk it out".
08/23/2013
Total posts: 12
Unique posters: 11