Body Image in the Bedroom

Contributor: Eden C. Eden C.
I guess this topic is aimed at other ladies, although guys are welcome to pitch in as I know they can have their own set of body issues.

My girlfriend loves fat. It's not about liking big girls, she just loves fat tissue. She loves squeezing my belly, arm flab, and thighs, in addition to the expected boobs and ass.

I am not a particularly voluptuous girl, but I have curves just like most other women do, and I have struggled with body image throughout my adult life. I am recovering from an eating disorder, and as I recover, I gain weight, and my girlfriend is there to squeeze it and draw attention to it. It makes me feel fat and ugly when she does it, but I know she's enjoying it.

I don't want to deprive her of something she enjoys so much, but it really upsets me. Of course, I've talked to her about it. I go over it again whenever she does it (almost every day). I've even had my doctor talk to her about it.

What should I do? I want to be confident and sexy!

Has anyone else had trouble accepting their own body in the bedroom?
02/23/2011
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Contributor: Redboxbaby Redboxbaby
Quote:
Originally posted by Eden C.
I guess this topic is aimed at other ladies, although guys are welcome to pitch in as I know they can have their own set of body issues.

My girlfriend loves fat. It's not about liking big girls, she just loves fat tissue. She loves ... more
I used to have this issue. My husband loves my curves and he tends to get visibly sad when I lose weight that takes my curves away. It took me 20+ years to finally accept my body.

I wake up everyday and have to promise myself that I am not on a quest to change my body, but to meet my body where it is and accept it where it is today. I had to learn to look at each part of my body I had issues with and turn the negative talk into positive talk. For example, I say, "My hips and my belly are not "fat", they are proof that I am a mother, and completely content with my life."

It wasn't until I believed the things I told myself, that I could totally appreciate where my husband was coming from and believe that he truly found my curves sexy.
02/23/2011
Contributor: Eden C. Eden C.
Quote:
Originally posted by Redboxbaby
I used to have this issue. My husband loves my curves and he tends to get visibly sad when I lose weight that takes my curves away. It took me 20+ years to finally accept my body.

I wake up everyday and have to promise myself that I am not ... more
I should definitely try that. I know that I'M the one with an issue, not her. There's nothing wrong with her touching my body, it's the way I perceive her touching my body.

Thanks for the help!
02/23/2011
Contributor: Redboxbaby Redboxbaby
Quote:
Originally posted by Eden C.
I should definitely try that. I know that I'M the one with an issue, not her. There's nothing wrong with her touching my body, it's the way I perceive her touching my body.

Thanks for the help!
Any time. It is not an easy road. I have to be vigilant and I have been known to tell myself (outloud) to, "Stop It!" when my thoughts turn negative, in regards to my body image.
02/23/2011
Contributor: MrRainybowbow MrRainybowbow
Quote:
Originally posted by Eden C.
I guess this topic is aimed at other ladies, although guys are welcome to pitch in as I know they can have their own set of body issues.

My girlfriend loves fat. It's not about liking big girls, she just loves fat tissue. She loves ... more
Honestly you should think of the weight being sexy if she likes it.
03/08/2011