Originally posted by
Just curious how you would do it differently if you could do it again with the knowledge you have now.
Multiple answer selections are possible, please select all that apply.
Really, that's not something I look back on and think "well this would have made my life better if I'd have done it differently... or not done it at all." I know I should not have had sex many of the times I did. I should have stood up and stopped being a wuss & said hey! I don't want
to do this so I'm not going to. But I thought it was better to prove that I was not scared to do it, several of the times I did and no, I should not have done it as young as I was, but I honestly can't say that had I NOT done things how I did that it'd have made something better for me now, in the future. I have always been pretty comfortable with myself sexually, just not with men until I met my current partner 7 years ago and he kind of helped me become comfortable with him and share all the things about me sexually that I knew but was scared to share with anyone.
I just don't think there's much reasoning for changing any of the choices I've made. I honestly can't say it'd have been better for me personally to remain a virgin. Talk about serious stress to stay a virgin and then not have sex with your partner til' marriage! For me, that would be too heavy to carry. I'd have under so much pressure put on by my own self that I wouldn't have had as much fun as I have in the 7 years with my partner.
I can't say I'm proud of probably a single thing I done sexually before I met the man I actually love, but I certainly don't have regrets. Learned from most mistakes, and let go of the shit I didn't love. No dwelling on the past. My dad has always been a firm believer in that -- not dwelling on our pasts & mistakes -- and he worked hard to wire this into us and it's helped me so much througout my 22 little years. I'd have still been holding myself guilty over horrific things that were not my fault had it not been for him and that teaching.
I could be a little regretful as far as one particular sexual incident goes, where something bad happened, but I try to refuse to let myself go there again. I shouldn't have a regret & for the most part, most days, I don't.
I know I should probably say "well waiting til I was married would've been the best," but in my heart, I simply don't feel that way. Can't help it.