Sexual Incompatibility with your partner

Missy27 Missy27
Do you feel like you are your partner are sexually incompatible? I have a high sex drive but beyond that, I am curious and adventurous. My husband lacks my curiosity and sense of adventure, though he very much appreciates and enjoys mine. This difference had been a big factor in us not having sex very much for a long time. I feel like I am peaking sexually and would love for him to be right there with me and even bringing new things to the table himself. Any advice?
03/27/2013
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edeneve edeneve
find out what he enjoys most having sex as well as anything else that may lead to sex. and, have you introduced any sex toys designed for males?
03/27/2013
Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
I had this problem in reverse for years. Then my wife had a change of heart and has been much more open. She will still not take the initiative - but she's the love of my life - I've got to work with she gives me. The alternative is all together undesirable, for me at least.

Be happy that he's open - and keep moving him your way - it's life - it's a process.
03/28/2013
CE CE
Quote:
Originally posted by Missy27
Do you feel like you are your partner are sexually incompatible? I have a high sex drive but beyond that, I am curious and adventurous. My husband lacks my curiosity and sense of adventure, though he very much appreciates and enjoys mine. This ... More
It sounds like you need to say almost exactly this to him. A loving heart to heart discussion could get things a little more on track. Maybe you could have some fun where one time you get to try something completely new and another time its his turn to pick something. Ask him about his fantasies or what turns him on the most and work with that. While laying together and touching each other tell him a sexy story or fantasy, then have him tell you one. Buy a new toy and then masturbate in front of him giving him a show. Do you get turned on by public secret play? Go out to eat wearing a skirt and in the middle of dinner inform him that you arent wearing any panties. Buy a remote vibrating egg and while out somewhere, hand him the remote. Shave yourself completely and in a crowded movie theater put his hand down your pants to feel how silky smooth you are. When he comes home from work tell him you were a bad girl and masturbated 5 times that day and you need to be punished.. and hand him a paddle.

Most of all tell him you love him, desire him and how much you want to drive him crazy while exploring each other sexually.

Good luck!
03/28/2013
SaucyxGirl SaucyxGirl
Quote:
Originally posted by Missy27
Do you feel like you are your partner are sexually incompatible? I have a high sex drive but beyond that, I am curious and adventurous. My husband lacks my curiosity and sense of adventure, though he very much appreciates and enjoys mine. This ... More
Absolutely my partner and I are sexually incompatible.
If the both of you have a good open line of communication then sit down and talk about your differences. This might help the both of you find a middle ground of sorts that the both of you can enjoy. The other thing is patience, try to keep feelings of resentment and guilt out of the picture by understanding that both of you are just not on the same page but that with some work it might be possible to engage a sense of curiosity in him.

So basically the key here is talking openly with each other. I can not stress the importance of this simple thing.
03/28/2013
Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by Missy27
Do you feel like you are your partner are sexually incompatible? I have a high sex drive but beyond that, I am curious and adventurous. My husband lacks my curiosity and sense of adventure, though he very much appreciates and enjoys mine. This ... More
One bit of advice. Surf here, together. Read blogs here, together. It will open conversation and get you to express your interests and desires in a way that might get you on the same page a bit more.
03/28/2013
AmethystQueen AmethystQueen
Yes, we are. We've talked about it and he loves me enough to try to come up to my level most of the time. I also try to come down to his level and chill out more. =) We're both striving for balance. In the meantime, I'm here getting toys! =)
03/28/2013
captainsgirl captainsgirl
Quote:
Originally posted by Missy27
Do you feel like you are your partner are sexually incompatible? I have a high sex drive but beyond that, I am curious and adventurous. My husband lacks my curiosity and sense of adventure, though he very much appreciates and enjoys mine. This ... More
Sort of...I went into lack of sex drive after we lost our first daughter in 2003. I did not get it back until the begining of 2012..(God Bless my hubby). Anyways, he has always had a super high sex drive. Well now that mine is off the charts, he is happy of course. But sometimes he is like wow I need a break, he's sore.lol..so ya soemtimes its hard.
03/28/2013
Missy27 Missy27
Thank you all. We did have a recent heart to heart about it. He is eager to come to my level, so will be working on it. I definitely will try some of your suggestions CE. I had always been the playful one in all aspects of our relationship, I guess I hadn't really thought about that it is completely who he is. I love that he wants more and yes, patience is definitely going to be necessary but should be fun and worthwhile.
03/29/2013
CE CE
Quote:
Originally posted by Missy27
Thank you all. We did have a recent heart to heart about it. He is eager to come to my level, so will be working on it. I definitely will try some of your suggestions CE. I had always been the playful one in all aspects of our relationship, I ... More
Thats great that you two talked Missy. Open communication is ALWAYS the key to any part of a relationship.

As for my suggestions I hope something works. A little titillating tease can go a long way! Good luck and have fun!
04/01/2013
Martiniman Martiniman
I feel your pain. I love my wife deeply, but we are pretty incompatible when it comes to sex. We are working on it and she will do a lot of things that were unimaginable 5 years ago. I'm more like you, with a high sex drive and I'm very creative, where she's the complete opposite. I wish you luck and I know it's frustrating, but we love our spouses for a reason, keep working on it just like I am.
04/04/2013
Hazeleyes2012 Hazeleyes2012
It always seems to be timing or an emotional issue it sucks...
04/04/2013
Cosmonaut Cosmonaut
Yeah everything is good.
04/04/2013
Total posts: 13
Unique posters: 11