I wonder how many calories are in a typical amount of semen?

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I wonder how many calories are in a typical amount of semen?

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Contributor: piffie piffie
Related to: 
The Bloggess: Stuff I wonder about porn stars
heh. what a question.
lets start this way: weight watchers categorize a "typical amount of semen" as a vitamin juice, and therefore has no points rating for it.they only comment they make is, that this "only counts if you directly get it from the producer, otherwise the important vitamins are gone"

and there is a hell lot of stuff, that changes the behavior of semen.
(it takes about 7-9 hours, until it effects the "outcome")
.) uncooked eggs can double the amount.
.) that it tastes better: celery, pineapple, kiwi, nuts, pasta, sweet wine, honey
.) bad: coffee, aspirin, beer, nicotine, curry, salt
.) really funny: champagne. gets the sparkling taste, if its a good one

there is even medicine, that makes it taste better.,.. called "semenex".

so, have fun while trying that...
07/03/2009
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Contributor: ~*SurrealisticFantasy*~ ~*SurrealisticFantasy*~
YAY for semen! I grabbed some fun, random jizz info on the web:

"Seminal fluid... is composed of dozens of chemical components. The
base of seminal fluid is primarily fructose (sugar) and proteins, with
many other trace minerals and substances. Here's a listing of some of
semen's ingredients:

Sugars: Fructose, sorbitol, inositol
Proteins and amino acids: glutathione, deoxyribonucleic acid (DNA), creatine
Minerals: Phosphorus, zinc, magnesium, calcium, potassium
Vitamins: Ascorbic acid (vitamin C), vitamin B12, choline
Hormones: Testosterone, prostaglandins
Body byproducts: Lactic acid, urea, uric acid, nitrogen...

Semen is a source of highly concentrated, high-quality protein. In
dietary terms, it's comparable to egg whites or gelatin. Besides
protein, semen contains high concentrations of some minerals, such as
zinc, and trace amounts of other important nutrients, like calcium and
magnesium."

"The caloric content of an average ejaculate is estimated to be approximately 15 calories."

"The amount of nutritive substance in semen varies as much as 100 percent from sample to sample; the amount of fructose (one of the main sugars found in honey) in semen varies over a range of 400 percent. Finally, the volume of ejaculate itself varies from 3 to 5 cubic centimeters--not exactly a precise measurement."

"Sex is a emotionally satisfying and absolutely to boosting activity; however, I just can't comprehend the fact of semen becoming an anti-depressant drug for women? Sounds absurd? Well, according to article of R. Persaud of NewScientist.com, semen literally makes women "happy". Gordon Gallup, a psychologist in the State University of New York, led a study dividing 293 female students into groups according to the frequency of condom usage and happiness assessment results using Beck Depression Inventory (BDI) scale. The result of the study reveals that women whose partners never used condoms scored the average 8 on the BDI scale, while those who often used them acquired the score of 10.5 and those always used condoms scored 11.3. Undoubtedly, those who never had sex with their partners yet scored 13.5. Indeed, semen can actually cause such mood change since it contains different mood-altering hormones, such as testosterone, estrogen, follicle-stimulating hormone, lutenizing hormone, prolactin and various types of prostaglandins."

"In one typical ejaculation (approximately one teaspoon), semen already contains 150 mg of protein, 11 mg of carbohydrates, 6 mg fat, 3 mg cholesterol, 7% US RDA potassium and 3% US RDA copper and zinc."
07/03/2009
Contributor: Valyn Valyn
Rofl.. I wonder if anyone's come up with a "Semen diet".. there are some weird diets out there..
07/03/2009
Contributor: Tuesday Tuesday
I read long ago that it was 6 calories. An old boyfriend used to ask if I were ready for a "6 calorie appetizer."
07/03/2009
Contributor: Mari Mari
Awesome list! Many thanks to both Piffie and SurrealisticFantasy for the info! I've been hunting this sort of thing up for a while now and it's nice to have all of it in one place.
10/15/2009
Contributor: TexasFire TexasFire
Quote:
Originally posted by ~*SurrealisticFantasy*~
YAY for semen! I grabbed some fun, random jizz info on the web:

"Seminal fluid... is composed of dozens of chemical components. The
base of seminal fluid is primarily fructose (sugar) and proteins, with
many other trace minerals and ... more
Only 15 calories? I remember watching a late-night sex information show (with a nude host in the adult film industry) and found out lots of interesting things about ejaculate. My wife doesn't swallow, however, so it's a calorie-free night for us.
12/01/2009
Contributor: Gary Gary
Has anyone tried that Semenex yet?
12/01/2009
Contributor: Luscious Lily Luscious Lily
Quote:
Originally posted by Gary
Has anyone tried that Semenex yet?
Wasn't there a thread a while back where a guy tried it, but only got one use because it all solidified in the jar?
12/01/2009
Contributor: El-Jaro El-Jaro
15 calories...that's what, 10 tic tacs?
12/01/2009
Contributor: Sammi Sammi
Quote:
Originally posted by El-Jaro
15 calories...that's what, 10 tic tacs?
That sounds about right
12/03/2009
Contributor: Dick-n-Jane Dick-n-Jane
Ladies... let me assure you that your man's jizz is high in protein, has zero calories, is fat free, 100% organic, saturated with happy hormones, and will make your breasts larger by morning.

What's not to love?
12/03/2009
Contributor: Dick-n-Jane Dick-n-Jane
Quote:
Originally posted by Gary
Has anyone tried that Semenex yet?
Yeah, I tried it. Semenex is primarily a blend of dehydrated fruit powders (lots of pineapple). As I recall it was a little on the expensive side, had little effect (so says Jane), and hardened up in the jar pretty quickly, as noted by Luscious Lily. I did not order seconds. Spend your money on quarts of pineapple juice instead... oh, and antacids too.
12/03/2009
Contributor: JEM JEM
Ordered some semenex plan on having the hubby try it as soon as it comes it!
12/12/2009
Contributor: Gary Gary
Quote:
Originally posted by JEM
Ordered some semenex plan on having the hubby try it as soon as it comes it!
Let us know how it goes.
12/15/2009
Contributor: ordinaryak ordinaryak
apperantly pineapple juice and cardamom are things that make your "juices" taste yummy not just mens either but womens. i can understand that i mean you are what you eat if you eat. if you want your"juices" to taste good keep away from meat,broccoli,garlic,o nion,and dairy for a week. i am a huge sigar holic who is also a picky eater andi ve noticed when i keep away from theese things and stick to things like honey,sweet teas,cinnomon,chocolat e,carrots,tomatos,swee t peas,and other non gas causeing veggies my guy will tell me i taste subtly sweet. usually im a big meat-eater and he usually tells me i taste like metal or irony. hum intresting huh?
02/28/2010
Contributor: El-Jaro El-Jaro
anyone take a nutrition or chemistry class when you'd burn food to figure out how many calories it had?

anyone wanna research and find out via experimenting?
02/28/2010
Contributor: deceased deceased
Still looks like snot and smells rancid to me. I'll pass on this one. Its a waste product. Like snot or urine or feces. The body doesn't make anything valuable or worthwhile, that is why we shower and wash our clothes. Even babies, if you study them long enough, are just screaming fleshy encasements for three quarters of a year's worth of crap.Semen needs to go in a condom, tied off, and put into a waste receptacle. Don't flush it, it chokes fish and birds who live in the water.
03/01/2010
Contributor: Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
Quote:
Originally posted by Gary
Has anyone tried that Semenex yet?
I bought Semenex. After one use the rest of the jar turned into a rock. Apparently the stuff is hygroscopic (attracts moisture). The stuff tastes awful. My wife indicated she could not taste any difference - no problem seems she likes the usual taste. Semenex now comes in single use packs - that's the only way to order it if you want to try it.
03/01/2010
Contributor: Midway through Midway through
I've never really thought about it, but I've read about it a few times in random magazines I've picked up here and there, I'm going to lol hard if someone comes up with a diet based on it being a daily nutrient.
07/22/2010
Contributor: MoonlightLust MoonlightLust
Quote:
Originally posted by Dick-n-Jane
Ladies... let me assure you that your man's jizz is high in protein, has zero calories, is fat free, 100% organic, saturated with happy hormones, and will make your breasts larger by morning.

What's not to love?
men's crisco is absolutely nasty as is giving a man head. I tasted it once. It got on my fingers. I thought it was mine and out of instinct tasted it I literally threw up. Yuck gross would never give a man head.
03/11/2011
Contributor: purplekidney purplekidney
She: My brother-in-law confirmed the pineapple juice theory, but he said it takes a lot. We've never bothered trying because I gag on the stuff so we just don't go all the way with a blowjob, which works fine for us.
04/11/2011
Contributor: Rory Rory
Somewhere around 7 calories per tsp
12/13/2012