would u continue to masturbate by yourself to reach orgasm after ur male partner had already ejaculated?

Contributor: Redboxbaby Redboxbaby
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
Yeah, of course, but WITH HIM there. Or HE can do it for me. Sometimes he comes first, sometimes I do. I still get to Come.

Why is sex "over" for some when the man ejaculates?

My Man and I often have sex where one of us ... more
It doesn't happen to us very often, but if he has already come he certainly helps me get off. Gladly he helps. He would never leave me hanging unless it was a dire emergency.
01/16/2011
Contributor: *Huxley* *Huxley*
I will finish myself if it doesn't happen.
No shame in that.
03/16/2011
Contributor: UnknownGirl UnknownGirl
He rarely allows himself to cum before I do. In the very rare circumstance that he does cum first he has no problems with me getting myself off.
03/18/2011
Contributor: Joie de Cherresse Joie de Cherresse
I do. If I haven't gone, which is rare, I will get myself off in front of him after. He loves it.
03/18/2011
Contributor: ID42 ID42
My husband usually makes me cum first during foreplay and again one or two more times during sex... but on the rare occasion that doesn't happen, sometimes I finish with help or with him just watching and sometimes we just roll over in our little ball and pass out together. Any way it ends, I never go to sleep feeling not satisfied.
03/18/2011
Contributor: MrRainybowbow MrRainybowbow
maybe, depends on my comfort lvl. But hes willing to try to plz me after he has. And if he didnt if i started to masterbate i know he'd be up and ready real fast watching that.
03/18/2011
Contributor: EdenJP EdenJP
Yes I would!
03/18/2011
Contributor: Ms. Spice Ms. Spice
i usually cum a couple times, but yeah, if not he helps me out
06/05/2011
Contributor: newfoundlust newfoundlust
Quote:
Originally posted by Kcito
would u let it go or masturbate until reaching orgasm?
We do that together all the time. She will sometimes do it or will have me do it for her with a toy.
06/05/2011
Contributor: sarki sarki
I would finish myself if he wouldn't help
06/05/2011
Contributor: MaryExy MaryExy
I usually could care less...
06/06/2011
Contributor: Wondermom Wondermom
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
Yeah, of course, but WITH HIM there. Or HE can do it for me. Sometimes he comes first, sometimes I do. I still get to Come.

Why is sex "over" for some when the man ejaculates?

My Man and I often have sex where one of us ... more
this, my husband sometimes gets a second wind watching me
06/06/2011
Contributor: moonch1ld moonch1ld
My gf has done this a couple times before. I don't mind.
06/06/2011
Contributor: indiglo indiglo
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
Yeah, of course, but WITH HIM there. Or HE can do it for me. Sometimes he comes first, sometimes I do. I still get to Come.

Why is sex "over" for some when the man ejaculates?

My Man and I often have sex where one of us ... more
This, for me too. I finish right there with him, and/or with his help. He wouldn't have it any other way.
06/06/2011
Contributor: [Red] [Red]
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
Sometimes, it's OK to just say, "You know, I'm not done. I didn't come, and I'd like to. Do you want to keep going, or will you just hold me and I'll do it myself with my Hitachi?"

IMO, sex doesn't end only ... more
It's true that sex doesn't have to stop once one partner reaches orgasm-- but it's also true that much of your post was loaded with sexist statements about the supposed 'job' of your man to get you off, the supposed responsibility he has for your orgasms, and the generalization that men aren't able to read the cues of their partner very well.

Dunno about you, but it's hard to miss my lover's orgasm. He's never had trouble detecting mine, either, and often reads me in ways I never knew I could be understood.

Not sure if you realize this, but it reads like you treat your lover like your Hitachi-- he's a tool to get you off, a favorite one, but if he's not up for it then you'll just use something else to get what you 'deserve'. You make it sound like he's obligated to get you off or something, which seems to put a lot of unnecessary pressure on the whole sexual encounter. I know if my lover put the same expectations on me as you put on your partner, I would have a hard time getting into the mood at all, much less getting him off.

You talk a lot about 'what needs to be done' and it leaves me wondering where the intimacy is. No offense meant, but you make it sound like sex is a chore to be completed in xyz fashion and if it's not done how you like it, then it's not done 'right'. It sounds like he needs to 'man up and do his job properly', and I can't think of anyone who'd be encouraged by that mindset.

It's true that talking about sex with your lover is a great idea-- it's always good to be open with your wants and needs, especially if they're very important to your satisfaction. What I'm trying to say here is that perhaps you invest so much importance into having orgasms that it debilitates not only his ability to pleasure you, but your ability to be pleasured. It seems you're quite focused on the big O and are determined to have it no matter what it takes, but is that really the best way to achieve the satisfaction you want?

I don't mean to offend you at all, but I felt it necessary to say something about the subject. Perhaps I don't understand your focus on orgasm because my satisfaction with my lover isn't based on whether or not we orgasm at all. He's not an object for me to use in any way necessary in order to get off, and that respect is quite mutual. If I didn't reach orgasm during sex, I wouldn't masturbate afterward because orgasm isn't my focus. If I felt unfulfilled, well-- sex wouldn't be over, would it? My fulfillment exists in conjunction with my lover's, not at his expense or regardless of his state of mind. I need him to be with me in mindset in order to be fulfilled-- and if we orgasm, great. If not, it's certainly not something I'm going to throw a fit about. I honestly have a hard time understanding how anybody -could- throw a fit about it.
06/06/2011
Contributor: ichigostrawberry ichigostrawberry
Yeah, I'm fine with it. It really depends on my mood if I want to continue or not though.
06/06/2011
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
Quote:
Originally posted by [Red]
It's true that sex doesn't have to stop once one partner reaches orgasm-- but it's also true that much of your post was loaded with sexist statements about the supposed 'job' of your man to get you off, the supposed responsibility ... more
I don't think you know me or My Man. We've been together for over 20 years and are usually pretty good at reading each other. Please refrain from making assumptions about me, him or our relationship, as you really have no idea what either of us have been through.

Not only do I have a very high sex drive, but due to a change in my orgasmic ability due to early peri-menopause, orgasm is sometimes difficult for me and I'm also a woman who gets "blue walls" very easily, so yeah, I think it IS a big deal if a man leaves thinking sex is over when HE comes and the woman doesn't! (which is what this thread is about.) I stated that, yes, it is my husband's job to stick around if I need an orgasm and he's already come. Why is that "sexist?" Unless you don't value the female sexual response.

Of course, when I was 22, and had only been having sex for 6 years and could come at the drop of a hat, I probably didn't value having easy orgasms, or having ANY orgasms as much as I do now.

The OP made comments leading us to think she was having to masturbate after her man got off and left her on her own, That's really sad. We see too many women being left on their own after their partner gets what he needs. I'm the one being "sexist?"

Yes, it IS My Man's job to help me get off. As it is mine to help him get off. No one said anything about "throwing a fit" (where did you get that in your assumptive statement?) but it IS a really tool-like action for a guy to leave a still horny women after he gets his rocks off. And, that is what this thread was about.

However, a woman should speak up if her partner is continually leaving her after he gets off and doesn't seem to care if she gets what she needs or not.

Sex is about connecting, sure, but it's also about pleasure and coming. Maybe your sex drive or your need for orgasm is not as strong as some here. I don't know. But, some of us value our orgasms as much as a man does. To assume any woman feels otherwise is simply making assumptions one has no right to do. And, when one has orgasmic difficulties or one is being left after her partner gets off, (as the OP stated was happening) I felt it was important to state that yeah, is IS her partner's job to help her get off. You don't think so? Wham Bam Thank You Ma'am, and he's off?

I also find when people continually say "no offense, but...." the next thing they say is something they do assume will offend. So, why say it?

As I don't get offended that easily, I'm going to let it go. But, please be more careful in the future when attacking someone when you have NO idea where they are coming from. OK?

Stating that one's partner should stick around if he has had his orgasm to get the job done for her is NOT a "sexist" statement. I wonder why anyone would think it was.

Someone downplaying a woman's need to have an orgasm causes me to pause for thought. If you don't think her orgasm is just as important as her partner's is, then you and I are on two different pages.

Sorry for the Wall O Text, but I think I need to defend women who are having to sneak off to the bathroom with their vibrators while their satisfied partner snoozes away.
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06/06/2011
Contributor: Eucaly Eucaly
Quote:
Originally posted by Kcito
would u let it go or masturbate until reaching orgasm?
Yeah, I've done this lots of times. Sometimes he helps, but if he's really exhausted he'll just cuddle or suck my nipples.
06/07/2011
Contributor: Ajax Ajax
Sometimes I do and sometimes I don't. It depends how close I was when he finished.
06/07/2011