Are there any women who find bisexual men attractive? Even arousing?

Forbidden Light Forbidden Light
Being bisexual, I feel constantly pulled to permanently join Team Hetero or Team Homo... From my experience, it seems that homosexual men are more open to forming a relationship with a bisexual guy. However, I have yet to have found a woman who can deal with it, let alone find it sexy...

I would love to hear from women who are attracted to bisexual men.
05/09/2010
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Owl Identified Owl Identified
My partner is male and he is attracted to all genders. I don't find that I am specifically attracted to him because of that. As someone that also dates/sleeps with all genders, I will say I find it appealing in a non-sexual way because of the sense of comradeship. He understands a lot of the experiences I've had because we have similar sexual orientations.

In other words: I'm do not find any sexual orientation more sexually appealing than another. However, if a person has a similar orientation as myself then that may work in their favor because it's something we have in common.
05/09/2010
Chilipepper Chilipepper
Speaking as a straight female, I have been attracted to bisexual men from time to time, but it really has to do with them as people, not their sexual preference. The ones I'm thinking of in particular had great grooming habits, talked more freely, and had such sweet, gentle personalities. Through conversation, I found they (my friends, I'm saying) had very definite Types of girls they would date ... let's just say that Chilipepper the Earth Mother Type was not an option.
05/09/2010
~LaUr3n~ ~LaUr3n~
I don't find it attractive per say. But I was friends with someone who had experiences with guys. His story is weird. He would let them give him oral, but he would not reciprocate. He never had sex with a guy or let someone do it to him. But many guys had tried to. I guess it was the size of his dick that turned guys on and so he liked the attention either way. This was years before I met him and I never knew til way after. I never would have guessed. He said he even dated a guy once but it was nothing serious and he broke it off because he said he didn't like men as lovers and hated the way they kissed.

I was intrigued by all of this because he is like one of the manliest men I know and I was very attracted to him. So in a way I was more attracted by the intrigue. Hopefully that made sense lol.
05/09/2010
Elodie Elodie
I'm attracted to a person, not a sexuality. And I think it would be fun to talk with my man about guys we both found hot. But if someone is with me, I want him to be with me, period. That might be where you're tripping up with women? Maybe they think you won't be happy with "just" a woman? Women tend to, on average, have lower self-esteem sexually than men.
05/10/2010
Forbidden Light Forbidden Light
Quote:
Originally posted by ~LaUr3n~
I don't find it attractive per say. But I was friends with someone who had experiences with guys. His story is weird. He would let them give him oral, but he would not reciprocate. He never had sex with a guy or let someone do it to him. But many ... More
That made total sense!
05/10/2010
~LaUr3n~ ~LaUr3n~
Quote:
Originally posted by Forbidden Light
That made total sense!
LOL thanks. I totally forgot to mention that when i asked him if he identified as being bisexual, he said no. He is just an equal opportunist lol. When I asked him to clarify in all seriousness he said that maybe 5 years ago he would have said he was but now, after the experiences he knows he is hetero and not interested.
05/10/2010
Forbidden Light Forbidden Light
Quote:
Originally posted by Elodie
I'm attracted to a person, not a sexuality. And I think it would be fun to talk with my man about guys we both found hot. But if someone is with me, I want him to be with me, period. That might be where you're tripping up with women? Maybe ... More
I think you're on to something, Elodie! I had a long term relationship where I was 100% monogamous. But she couldn't get over the fact that I also found men attractive and arousing. That started the rift, for sure.

Is there a way to enhance the "lower sexual self-esteem"? Is there a way to verify my devotion, in spite of my broadened field of options?
05/10/2010
Forbidden Light Forbidden Light
Quote:
Originally posted by ~LaUr3n~
LOL thanks. I totally forgot to mention that when i asked him if he identified as being bisexual, he said no. He is just an equal opportunist lol. When I asked him to clarify in all seriousness he said that maybe 5 years ago he would have said he was ... More
I sometimes wonder if it's a phase. Looking back, I can see some stuff I was really into that I am not anymore. However, would that make me heterosexual because I'm faithful to my wife? Or would that just make me a committed bisexual?

I think I am beyond the "college experimentation" level of bisexuality; it's a natural part of my design to be attracted to both men and women.
05/10/2010
Elodie Elodie
Quote:
Originally posted by Forbidden Light
I think you're on to something, Elodie! I had a long term relationship where I was 100% monogamous. But she couldn't get over the fact that I also found men attractive and arousing. That started the rift, for sure.

Is there a way ... More
Sorry, but not really. That's up to the individual to do on her own. My only advice is to look for women who are already self-confident. Introduce yourself as a person, not a sexuality, get to know women as friends first, and just let it come up naturally.

I think a woman who's threatened by your attraction to men would eventually be threatened by a heterosexual male's attraction to women anyway, honestly. People who can't handle the fact that their mates will find other people attractive are sadly common.
05/10/2010
Owl Identified Owl Identified
Quote:
Originally posted by Forbidden Light
I sometimes wonder if it's a phase. Looking back, I can see some stuff I was really into that I am not anymore. However, would that make me heterosexual because I'm faithful to my wife? Or would that just make me a committed ... More
I think you have internalized, unfortunately, the negative stereotypes toward bisexual people or those with fluid sexualities. You often hear "slut, you'll get it anywhere you can" or "you'll grow out of it", etc. These are negative stereotypes about us that, in my opinion, are perpetuated because people can't wrap their minds around the fact that people can (gasp!) be something besides one or the other. Humans love binaries, that's for sure.

It's true that attraction can be fluid though, and yours may be; for years I was primarily attracted to women, then it fluctuated back toward men, and now it's swinging back toward women again. But it's never FULLY one or the other. It's always in between, just to varying degrees. My primary partner is male, and many of his partners have also been male. Right now we are primarily committed to each other, but we aren't any less queer because of it. When we have sex outside of our relationship it's still with all genders, and if we broke up tomorrow our next romantic partners could respectively be any gender.

Finally, in response to what you asked Elodie, and seconding her response: any woman that is less attracted to you because of your sexuality? Is not a person you want to be with in the first place. Your lover should love and appreciate all of you, including your sexuality. This includes your kinks, your gender preferences, your appetite for sex, EVERYTHING! And a good way to build your self-confidence would be to have more fluid-sexuality type friends. Having a group of people like yourself to share your feelings and problems with can be REALLY helpful. Going back to my original comment, that's why I love having a boyfriend that is into all genders. He understands me!
05/10/2010
~LaUr3n~ ~LaUr3n~
Quote:
Originally posted by Forbidden Light
I sometimes wonder if it's a phase. Looking back, I can see some stuff I was really into that I am not anymore. However, would that make me heterosexual because I'm faithful to my wife? Or would that just make me a committed ... More
For him, he was a total attention whore. It had to do with being cheated on by a fiance too. But mostly the attention thing.
05/10/2010
Kim! Kim!
As far as like an actual person I would say it doesn't matter either way to me, it isn't the sexuality that attracts me or not.

If you mean like porn, well I don't mind watching guys but I'm not a fan of watching anal no matter what genders are going at it. I keep waiting to witness "poop dick" for some reason.
06/10/2010
PolyGirl PolyGirl
Quote:
Originally posted by Forbidden Light
Being bisexual, I feel constantly pulled to permanently join Team Hetero or Team Homo... From my experience, it seems that homosexual men are more open to forming a relationship with a bisexual guy. However, I have yet to have found a woman who can ... More
I've had relationships with bi men, but it's not that I'm attracted to bi men. I just met someone I was attracted to who happened to be bi.

I think what you are getting at, though, in that women can't "deal with it" is that women are turned off by a man who's been with other men. I figure everyone I'm with has been with someone and I assume they've taken a shower since, so... yeah, I just don't think it's a big deal.
06/12/2010
Envy Envy
My bf is bi and I love it, actually. I like guy x guy things, and the big plus is my bf is experimental and loves toys (he's also rather fem). I love the fact i can dominate him, and he actually *wants* me to get a harness and peg him! Hell even dressing as a male (though i am straight) makes him red in the face and pitch a tent, LOL!

But seriously, straight or bi doesn't matter in the end to me really, but it seems to me a bi guy is more, well... 'accepting' of certain toys and practices I should think? I know not all straight men like anal as they associate it with being bi or gay, so it would make sense a bi guy would be more accepting of toys perhaps, even butt toys, but yeah, I dunno, I'm babbling and it's late at night lol.

All I will say is that, yes, i find it adorable when my bf gets hit on by other men and when he wishes I could take him with a dildo, but would i share him with anyone? Hell no. I know he's all mine for sure in the end, and he doesn't like sharing either, lol.
06/13/2010
Jill Ingoff Jill Ingoff
I find that it turns me on, actually. I'm definitely attracted to bisexual men. I've even tried to get my boyfriends to "experiment" openly.
06/13/2010
PassionQT PassionQT
My partner is bi and I'm ok with it. It was a little odd at first seeing him suck cock with me, but it was fun because we were doing it together. He is a top though. I'm not sure how I'd feel about him bottoming. He won't let me peg him and honestly I'm not sure I'd want to.
07/11/2010
sweet sally sweet sally
I think Elodie hit the nail on the head. So many women have such a low self esteem they would be jealous of their partner no matter the orientation.

I know personally, my current bf has had many issues w/ jealous gf's in the past. He loves the fact that I too admire the beauty of a woman and flirt w/ them as much as he does.

But, to answer you question directly, I have never dated anyone or known anyone to be openly bi. However, I do find bi porn completely arousing. I also love that my bf lets me anally stimulate him. One night he actually stuck one of my (penis shaped) toys in his mouth and I totally loved it.

So, keep your head up and look for a confident partner no matter the gender.
07/12/2010
inbarati inbarati
Quote:
Originally posted by Forbidden Light
Being bisexual, I feel constantly pulled to permanently join Team Hetero or Team Homo... From my experience, it seems that homosexual men are more open to forming a relationship with a bisexual guy. However, I have yet to have found a woman who can ... More
Heh, as a pansexual girl, I'd really like to date a bisexual or pansexual guy, but gee, do I have trouble finding them. I also feel pulled to 'join a team' so to speak. Straight guys tend to think my sexuality is somehow about them, and I was recently turned down for a date by a girl who told me she 'didn't mess with bi chicks because they're crazy'.

I need to get out of the boonies.
07/26/2010
joja joja
I am actually very attracted to bisexual men, mostly because I love watching guy-on-guy. Also because I tend to assume that non-hetero and/or non-cis people are more likely to be very chill and very liberal, despite the fact that it may not be true.

When I found out my last boyfriend was bi I literally squealed with excitement.
07/31/2010
Kina Kina
Quote:
Originally posted by Forbidden Light
I sometimes wonder if it's a phase. Looking back, I can see some stuff I was really into that I am not anymore. However, would that make me heterosexual because I'm faithful to my wife? Or would that just make me a committed ... More
I don't think its a phase. Just because you're in a relationship with one gender and remain faithful to that person does not mean you are any less attracted to people of the same and opposite gender.
09/12/2010
lilfemme23 lilfemme23
Quote:
Originally posted by Forbidden Light
Being bisexual, I feel constantly pulled to permanently join Team Hetero or Team Homo... From my experience, it seems that homosexual men are more open to forming a relationship with a bisexual guy. However, I have yet to have found a woman who can ... More
Ohhh yeah! that is very very hot!
09/15/2010
Trashley Trashley
Quote:
Originally posted by ~LaUr3n~
I don't find it attractive per say. But I was friends with someone who had experiences with guys. His story is weird. He would let them give him oral, but he would not reciprocate. He never had sex with a guy or let someone do it to him. But many ... More
Weird. Same story for one of my friends. I was kinda confused that he identified himself as bisexual, while not enjoying homosexual sex, only hetero. ...Does that even count then?
09/17/2010
P'Gell P'Gell
Quote:
Originally posted by Forbidden Light
Being bisexual, I feel constantly pulled to permanently join Team Hetero or Team Homo... From my experience, it seems that homosexual men are more open to forming a relationship with a bisexual guy. However, I have yet to have found a woman who can ... More
I think, if they have the Classic Androgyny Look, they are awfully attractive. But, my "type" is a tough, muscled, Bad Boy.

I went out with a rather Androgynous guy a long time ago. My dad and one of my male cousins thought he was Gay (he wasn't, either that or he could really fake enjoying hetero sex well. He could Come twice in rapid succession, and made as much noise as I did.) but, I still don't know if he was Bi or not. He was the Classic Pretty Boy. I was young (about 18 or 19, in an Open Relationship with My Man, and quite taken with this young man. It let me know I had the capacity for Polyamory, though. I have to, I guess, thank him for that.) He wasn't all that good in bed, though. Great kisser, though. Had NO idea how to go down. {shrug} He got a couple of chances and when he didn't take the bait, I booted him.

Lauren, I wonder if we knew the same guy. Probably not, but they seemed very similar. This dude was INTO himself, but it was NOT due to his sexual preferences, it was just his personality. Very good looking guy and he knew it.
09/17/2010
Madeira Madeira
Quote:
Originally posted by Forbidden Light
Being bisexual, I feel constantly pulled to permanently join Team Hetero or Team Homo... From my experience, it seems that homosexual men are more open to forming a relationship with a bisexual guy. However, I have yet to have found a woman who can ... More
Um, there are a lot of women who are into bisexual men, just check out "yaoi" and you'll find male/male erotica specifically aimed at women.
09/17/2010
Yucca Yucca
It totally depends on the person, and how I connect, but a positivity to homosexuality is definitely a turn-on, and being bisexual definitely means they are open!

Being bisexual myself, I appreciate men who can understand having homo and hetero relationships. Knowing that someone is bi also means they are definitely not homophobic so that is a plus in and of itself.

I also find man on man attractive, so thinking of a possible threesome that isn't always w-w-m is awesome as well.
09/20/2010
zeebot zeebot
Yes yes yes! Goodness, yes.
02/07/2011
Woman China Woman China
No.

I find them so very much arousing!!!!! For a casual friend who I have sex with? Yes. This is something I would like to have, as then threesome are easier.

But for a relationship... I do not hand out a questionnaire and ask on the first date. I am attracted to people based on their personalities. Not his sexual orientation.

But... *grins* I would love to settle down with a man who is bi though. Only thing he'd have to promise is never to tie me down to make me watch. That would just be cruel!!!!
02/07/2011
Curves Curves
bi guys are totally hot in my opinion.
04/14/2011
Kittentits Kittentits
Owl Identified put it very well: "Finally, in response to what you asked Elodie, and seconding her response: any woman that is less attracted to you because of your sexuality? Is not a person you want to be with in the first place."

She's absolutely right. If a woman can't handle it, consider it like a handy litmus test that lets you know right away that she isn't for you. Chances are that these women are either homo/biphobic or overly jealous (and likely to have been upset thinking of you with anyone). It's possible your approach is somehow off, to be fair, but it seems less likely than prejudice or sexual insecurity.

And, to answer your question, yes. I find bisexual men very sexy, and I know other women who feel the same way. Hell, there's a reason most yaoi and slash is written by women.
04/14/2011
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