Oral sex. Women. Confused.

Contributor: Miss Anonymous Miss Anonymous
As a women i've never really needed to know how to perform oral sex on a nother women. I hope to be able to do so oneday. I want to one day be with a women, and my boyfriend FULLY supports it. I just want to know how to do it. I asked my guy to teach me what he does. It never works, he sucks at explaining things. I'm left on my own. Any of you know any good books off eden I sould look into? Do you have any tips you can pass along my way?

I have posted this in another forum. I'm also posting it here because, I did not know which area was best. To be on the safe side I just posted them in both areas. Please forgive me if we are not allowed to do that.
07/23/2011
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Contributor: GingerAnn GingerAnn
Relevant topic analysis on Oral sex enhancers:

Is oral sex a priority in foreplay?
Do you need to receive/give some oral to really get you going?

Clitoral desensitization
I have a question that i need some advice on. I get very aroused when having sex with my husband it doesn't take much for me to climax. Meaning I can.

Any advice for practicing deep throating?
I'm looking for tips, or techniques to practice to get deeper.

How to keep up the pace buring a blow job?
I wish I could give a better BJ, but it is so much work on my back, neck and jaw. How do I keep up the pace?

toysforall has graduated!
He made my job VERY easy. Almost too easy. Congrats hun! Keep rockin the reviews!
07/23/2011
Contributor: froggiemoma froggiemoma
not sure , but will keep an eye on this post because I would also like to know.
07/23/2011
Contributor: Miss Anonymous Miss Anonymous
Quote:
Originally posted by froggiemoma
not sure , but will keep an eye on this post because I would also like to know.
Thanks! Hope fully it comes up with some good ansers. I also posted it in the "womens sexual health" section also.
07/23/2011
Contributor: Orion Orion
Well i do know one thing from all the years i have been giving oral there is about 3 different ways depending on the lady. Some like direct clitoral stimulation then there's the one that almost cant ever handle direct so you you kind of have to lick around the clitoris or to the side can be difficult to bring her to orgasm without practice lol. Then of course there's both direct and indirect start off licking up and down but if you want to make her orgasm you have to zero in on that button indirect or directly depending on the woman and once you see the reactions you get and you find the right spot try to stay there and finish the job. Moving around to much can cause great frustration. The licking bit well that is something you have to experiment with every woman is so different you have to play by your reactions. Do a nice u shape around the clitoris and start to gently help it along its way sucking it out of the hood to make it pop out better then gently start to like kneed it with your tongue slowly increasing pressure and speed. Quick little rapid licks right on it or in the indirect case to the side through the hood. Just so you know i haven't ever failed to make a girl explode in 3-4 minutes >.> and as i said a lot of it takes experimenting due to the varied nature of women. I find asking her what she likes helps the most.
07/23/2011
Contributor: Antipova Antipova
I read and reviewed this book which did a pretty good job of explaining some tongue exercises. A lot of technique I thought was common sense, but it might help build your confidence if you're feeling unsure of yourself.

(I'm not super-qualified to answer your quesiton, though, because I've never given oral to a woman, and I'm not really the biggest fan of receiving it either.)
07/23/2011
Contributor: Wild Orchid Wild Orchid
I can add Violet Blue's Ultimate Guide to Cunnilingus (I think I saw it here). I'm a total virgin myself but I found this book really helpful. It doesn't overwhelm with lots of detailed techniques, rather it gives suggestions. Has a bit of everything when it comes to the topic - even using acupressure to increase arousal and on top of that reads very, very easily. When I was reading it I felt really inspired to explore. Shame that I'm so introverted when there is n screen in front of me - no way to find a stunt-pussy to try.
07/23/2011
Contributor: Orion Orion
The only way to learn is to do, every single woman is different so its not like you can prepare and then know what your doing. I have done for many many years and no book is going to give you the magic step by step lol.

The only thing that was consistent in my 16 years of giving oral successfully mind you is the pressure, some like indirect direct or both once u figure that out your golden and it isn't hard to learn that she will probably start to laugh or jerk away whenever you touch her clitoris full out the whole time so she would probably like indirect. That's the first thing you have to either figure out or ask straight up.

I would say the next most important step is once you have her bucking up and in to your mouth most likely your finding the sweet spot which means DON'T move get more intense with it in that spot and make her cum in your face drool.

I like to warm her up by using long full licks of my tongue making it flat try to stay away from just using tip of tongue specially at first it can be to much.

Lick all over like your eating an ice cream cone and then go to her clit and lick it tongue flat and using only the first couple inches of it up and down making swirls and it and when your trying to make her cum start to add pressure stroking your tongue up and down faster and harder you want to increase the pressure slowly so you do not ruin it. Where one day that works tomorrow it may not just so you know.

Always have to pay attention to your partner that is how you truly learn watch her body language and listen to her moans you can tell generally if its getting good for her deep groaning can start even if she quite will be very hard to resist and start to buck up in to your face.

Well thats about all i can say tbh hope it helps
07/23/2011
Contributor: CutiePatootie CutiePatootie
I think the biggest thing to remember is that every girl is different, we each like different things so paying attention and talking about it is really important. I like my clit being sucked hard by the last girlfriend prefered a light flicking on her clit.

Something that I think everyone needs to know before playing with a girl: trim your nails! I've had some uncomfortable experiences due to long finger nails.

Good luck!
07/27/2011
Contributor: mandi myth mandi myth
the tongue is just a muscle, when you're alone, or if you don't care that people look at you strange, practice with it, stick it out of your mouth and try to move it up and down as fast as you can. even if the girl will like it slow, you'll still have the tongue to bring her to a full orgasm.

and what CutiePatootie said... trim your nails. very important.
07/31/2011
Contributor: Booktease Booktease
Quote:
Originally posted by Orion
Well i do know one thing from all the years i have been giving oral there is about 3 different ways depending on the lady. Some like direct clitoral stimulation then there's the one that almost cant ever handle direct so you you kind of have to ... more
Yes! I was about to offer similar suggestions. There are several methods I use and I think it all depends on what the woman likes. I know that sometimes direct clitoral stimulation can be too much, so you can use your tongue and sort of 'flick' it against the side of the clitoral hood instead of directly on the clit itself. Also, some women like more suction than others. Gently sucking against the clit while flicking your tongue can be pleasurable to some. Others may find it uncomfortable. I usually close my lips around my partner's clit and that works best for her, though its fun to tease a little first by flicking against the clit with your tongue gently or 'writing your ABC's' with your tongue first.

My partner also sometimes likes it when I swirl my tongue around her clit vigorously. This will sound silly, but sort of like a washing machine on the spin cycle.

Variation is great, but once you find something that works and your partner starts reacting to it and you think they are close to the edge, don't stop. Really. Just keep going until it happens. I find that too much movement that close to the end is distracting.
08/01/2011
Contributor: Gingy Gingy
Everyone is different I dont think a book will help. Best thing to do is ask the woman you are with. Some don't even like oral for me it does next to nothing I have trouble feeling it for some reason.
08/08/2011
Contributor: M121212 M121212
Quote:
Originally posted by Orion
The only way to learn is to do, every single woman is different so its not like you can prepare and then know what your doing. I have done for many many years and no book is going to give you the magic step by step lol.

The only thing that ... more
Ooooh thanks for writing. That was very fun to read!
02/14/2012
Contributor: charletnarouh charletnarouh
In my experience, the only constant between all the women is that my tongue was on their clit. The details are unique to each woman. Some like circles, others like flicks, others more stroking. Some like firm and direct, others light and flitting, others around the sides. Some like penetration with my tongue, while others hate it. Some like fingers inside while my tongue is on their clit, thrusting or hitting their g-spot or just filling them. Some like 1, 2, 3, 4 fingers, others don't want anything inside. You're not going to really understand until you do it. Just communicate with the woman you're with and see what she likes. She'll be able to tell you and/or show you better than any book. Variety is good sometimes, switching up your technique, but once she indicates that what you're doing is working really well for her, don't change or stop unless she indicates you should because otherwise, from a receiver's standpoint, it gets really frustrating. Basically, just enjoy it, listen to her and practice, practice, practice.
02/14/2012
Contributor: xGOLDx xGOLDx
You just gotta go with whatever cues the lady gives you. We all like different things, so there is no generic eating pussy rules. Just see how she reacts, you'll know when you are doing good.
02/17/2012
Contributor: zecookiepuss zecookiepuss
Quote:
Originally posted by CutiePatootie
I think the biggest thing to remember is that every girl is different, we each like different things so paying attention and talking about it is really important. I like my clit being sucked hard by the last girlfriend prefered a light flicking on ... more
OMG... so true! Listening to sounds and groans and when they get louder and more intense is how you figure out your partners preferences when giving oral. I have found that moving your tongue (not your whole face) in a circular motion on and around the clit does wonders for many ladies. The trick is to try to use the flat part of the tongue to put some pressure on the clit whilst moving it around. You can adjust the intensity based on the person by the amount of pressure you apply. The most important thing though is to really WANT to do it... as long as you're excited and turned on to actually go down on a woman... that goes a LONG way in getting her turned on from oral.
02/17/2012
Contributor: zecookiepuss zecookiepuss
Quote:
Originally posted by charletnarouh
In my experience, the only constant between all the women is that my tongue was on their clit. The details are unique to each woman. Some like circles, others like flicks, others more stroking. Some like firm and direct, others light and flitting, ... more
Very sound advice!
02/17/2012
Contributor: Sally Forth Sally Forth
Yes! Trimmed and/or filed nails are key! I personally prefer suction on my clit and digital penetration... or penetration with a dildo depending on my comfort level with my partner. As everyone has said: every woman is different. The keys to being good at it are being good at communication, and as zecookiepuss says enjoying what you're doing. She'll be able to tell if you're not into it. If you don't like it, you don't like it... so don't do it. Tell the next lady you're going to be with together up front that he'll be providing the oral pleasure and you'll be doing something else. There are oh so many ways to please a woman, as you know from being a woman! HAVE FUN!!
03/13/2012
Contributor: RomanticGoth RomanticGoth
Great advice everyone! I like to watch a girl masturbate before diving in. It gives me a better idea on what she likes and go from there.
03/22/2012
Contributor: sneako sneako
Quote:
Originally posted by Miss Anonymous
As a women i've never really needed to know how to perform oral sex on a nother women. I hope to be able to do so oneday. I want to one day be with a women, and my boyfriend FULLY supports it. I just want to know how to do it. I asked my guy to ... more
ask her what she likes and a little lick & nibble on the inner thighs can be nice. have fun!
03/23/2012
Contributor: tigertiger tigertiger
Quote:
Originally posted by Miss Anonymous
As a women i've never really needed to know how to perform oral sex on a nother women. I hope to be able to do so oneday. I want to one day be with a women, and my boyfriend FULLY supports it. I just want to know how to do it. I asked my guy to ... more
i don't have any links atm but i know thereare actually instructional videos out there. i watched one in a sex ed class in college
03/25/2012
Contributor: SouthernBelle SouthernBelle
I feel like it takes some practice and communication to figure out what works best. It is a very individual thing. Sometimes it's direct, sometimes it's indirect...

I thought this guide was super helpful (and entertaining) as well! link
05/31/2012
Contributor: vitriolicvertigo vitriolicvertigo
Don't start out too fast and furious. Spend a good amount of time teasing.
Combination of licking and sucking.
To be real, when you get there you'll kind of know what to do. People always say that but it's true! And let her direct you - body language, words, whatever.
06/01/2012