Heterosexual Bias?

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Heterosexual Bias?

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Contributor: Catch Star Catch Star
Do you think that in general, people who post in the forums here forget about LGBTQ peeps when posing questions?

I kinda felt that way, but wasn't sure if it was just me...
04/30/2012
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Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Probably, but I'm sure it isn't intentional. Those who aren't representative of those categories/labels (whatever you wish to call them) don't think about that stuff automatically as it's outside of their relevant experience in life.

I try to make sure I word things to include everyone. If you identify as a man, then click the male boxes in my polls. Same for people who identify as women and I say significant other/partner/spouse instead of husband/wife. (In most cases.)
04/30/2012
Contributor: Ciao. Ciao.
I would say that these forums in general are pretty great when it comes to both recognizing and dealing with various different LGBTQ spectrum people, and while there are definitely some questions/posts/etc. that ignore those categories I haven't seen any real issues here.
04/30/2012
Contributor: Vanille Vanille
Sometimes, it gets a little frustrating but in the end, life goes on. I experience it a lot in the kink community on Tumblr, where people mostly are all about M/F relationships. I do my part in making sure my writings and such are gender-neutral when necessary. (lit: using 'they' or 'them' as opposed to a specific gender pronoun so everyone is included.)
04/30/2012
Contributor: ghalik ghalik
Yup. But that's pretty much what the world is like so I try not to let it get to me.
04/30/2012
Contributor: BBW Talks Toys BBW Talks Toys
I find it to be like this:

People, especially those who haven't gotten to know too many people in the community here, tend to ask based on what's relevant in their own lives (as Stormy said above). I do find that as people are around here more and more and get to know people, they tend to become broader in their inclusion of people/genders/prefere nces.

I don't think it's intentional or meant to exclude anyone, it's just what they know. I happen to spend a lot of time in both the "straight world" and in the "LGBT community," so I tend to be hyperaware. And I still find it very unfortunate that those "worlds" so rarely intertwine.
04/30/2012
Contributor: Catch Star Catch Star
Quote:
Originally posted by BBW Talks Toys
I find it to be like this:

People, especially those who haven't gotten to know too many people in the community here, tend to ask based on what's relevant in their own lives (as Stormy said above). I do find that as people are around ... more
It's good to know that what I'm seeing is probably just a touch of ignorance about pronouns then.
04/30/2012
Contributor: BBW Talks Toys BBW Talks Toys
Quote:
Originally posted by Catch Star
It's good to know that what I'm seeing is probably just a touch of ignorance about pronouns then.
Likely. What I've seen some other LGBT folks do is comment on the posts with things like "None of these options include me, so I could not vote." And then explain what their options would be had they been included.

The open minded people will make note to be more inclusive. The close minded people likely won't stick around long, so it's win-win.
04/30/2012
Contributor: Catch Star Catch Star
Quote:
Originally posted by BBW Talks Toys
Likely. What I've seen some other LGBT folks do is comment on the posts with things like "None of these options include me, so I could not vote." And then explain what their options would be had they been included.

The open ... more
O! I love that suggestion!!! That's such a nice way of drawing attention to unintentional exclusion! I must use that line!
05/01/2012
Contributor: BBW Talks Toys BBW Talks Toys
Quote:
Originally posted by Catch Star
O! I love that suggestion!!! That's such a nice way of drawing attention to unintentional exclusion! I must use that line!
I've seen DeliciousSurprise use it most, so credit her in that.
05/01/2012
Contributor: BBW Talks Toys BBW Talks Toys
Quote:
Originally posted by Catch Star
O! I love that suggestion!!! That's such a nice way of drawing attention to unintentional exclusion! I must use that line!
If it gives you any indication of the transformation that has occurred in me since I joined EF about 18 months ago, I'll put it to you this way:

When I arrived I was a closeted woman, deeply rooted in conservatism. The only gay friends I had were ones I knew in high school and I didn't even know of anyone personally who is transgendered. Now I'm open about my sexuality, and more than half of my current friends are either gay or lesbian, and actually know transgendered people.

That's just my journey. It certainly isn't everyone's journey, but getting to know people who were different than me here, gave me courage to get to know more people in the real world too.
05/01/2012
Contributor: Incendiaire Incendiaire
Quote:
Originally posted by Catch Star
Do you think that in general, people who post in the forums here forget about LGBTQ peeps when posing questions?

I kinda felt that way, but wasn't sure if it was just me...
I think it's just a by-product of the hetero-centric world we live in.

For straight people, with mostly straight friends, who see mostly straight people on TV, it's probably very easy to forget about those who don't conform to that.

I don't necessarily hold it against them, but I feel happier when someone makes the effort to be more inclusive.
05/01/2012
Contributor: Bex1331 Bex1331
I don't think so, I feel like most posts try to include non-hetero options, but not always, I think it's just because they don't think of it though not because they're intentionally trying to exclude
05/01/2012
Contributor: BBW Talks Toys BBW Talks Toys
Quote:
Originally posted by Incendiaire
I think it's just a by-product of the hetero-centric world we live in.

For straight people, with mostly straight friends, who see mostly straight people on TV, it's probably very easy to forget about those who don't conform to ... more
"...it's just a by-product of the hetero-centric world we live in."

Exactly.
05/01/2012
Contributor: Catch Star Catch Star
Quote:
Originally posted by BBW Talks Toys
If it gives you any indication of the transformation that has occurred in me since I joined EF about 18 months ago, I'll put it to you this way:

When I arrived I was a closeted woman, deeply rooted in conservatism. The only gay friends I ... more
Thanks for sharing your story. I grew up in an extremely libral family. No one gave a crap when I came out.

When I see heterocentric bias, I get nervous because I'm not used to dealing with it
05/01/2012
Contributor: DeliciousSurprise DeliciousSurprise
Without being toooo redundant...

I think that most people do it because their daily lives are steeped in heteronormativity--we are all assumed heterosexual unless it is otherwise specified. Because the world is straight, most of the polls skew that way.

If people don't experience diversity--gender, sexuality, etc. until they start posting on the EF forums, we have to bear in mind that they aren't ignoring fringe groups out of hate or spite, but because they're fringe groups they don't normally see.
05/01/2012
Contributor: DeliciousSurprise DeliciousSurprise
Quote:
Originally posted by BBW Talks Toys
I've seen DeliciousSurprise use it most, so credit her in that.
Well, I like ticky boxes as much as the next girl so if I can't vote I tend to pout and stomp about, which doesn't win me a lot of friends, so I try to be tactful.
05/01/2012
Contributor: BBW Talks Toys BBW Talks Toys
Quote:
Originally posted by DeliciousSurprise
Well, I like ticky boxes as much as the next girl so if I can't vote I tend to pout and stomp about, which doesn't win me a lot of friends, so I try to be tactful.
I've never witnessed you stomping or pouting about ANYTHING. Ever.
05/01/2012
Contributor: SouthernBelle SouthernBelle
Quote:
Originally posted by Catch Star
Do you think that in general, people who post in the forums here forget about LGBTQ peeps when posing questions?

I kinda felt that way, but wasn't sure if it was just me...
I think people do what is normal to them, so maybe-- but I doubt that it's intentional.
05/01/2012