To me, the word queer is as offensive as the word cracker. Honestly, the people who are strongly offended by certain labels, such as queer, fag, or even nigger, tend to make it worse. The ones who are offended usually overreact. Those melodramatic reactions are the reason those labels still have intense, negative connotations. If you keep thinking those words are hateful, then they are always going to feel hateful.