Have you changed your label for your gender more than once in your life?

lecanis lecanis
I've spoken to a lot of people about gender issues, and it always surprises me to hear that I'm not the only one who has spent a lot time questioning my gender. Before learning about labels like 'genderqueer', I went back and forth between identifying as male and female several times in my life, and it seemed an abnormal experience based on conversations with trans* friends. How many of you have changed labels more than once, or spent a long time unsure about your gender?
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
I've always known my gender.
31
I struggled with my gender for a long time.
15
I've changed my label for my gender once, when I figured it out.
9
I've changed my label for my gender more than once.
11
I now identify as genderqueer.
10
I now identify as trans*
15
I now identify as cisgender.
4
Other: Explain!
8
Total votes: 103 (64 voters)
Poll is closed
06/26/2012
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xMila xMila
No, I've always been female inside and out.
06/26/2012
butts butts
Only once, when I discovered my transsexuality WASN'T just a "tomboy thing"
06/26/2012
Andrew1992 Andrew1992
Definitely not.
06/27/2012
nori nori
I've felt varying degrees of queer, but i've always used female for my gender.

now orientation? changed three times this week.
06/28/2012
thisisadeletedaccount thisisadeletedaccount
I changed from identifying as female to a trans*, genderqueer identity. There were points in the past before I knew those terms where I wondered if maybe I was supposed to be a guy, but those were always speculative feelings, not a full-fledged identity change.
06/28/2012
sodapin sodapin
Quote:
Originally posted by lecanis
I've spoken to a lot of people about gender issues, and it always surprises me to hear that I'm not the only one who has spent a lot time questioning my gender. Before learning about labels like 'genderqueer', I went back and forth ... More
I think I've only changed it once when I realized that trans people actually existed and I fit that perfectly xD
06/29/2012
radioboy radioboy
I identified as genderqueer for a while, but I waffled on whether or not I was full on going to transition to male while I identified as GQ. I used ze/hir for a while, but was much happier when I was referred to as male. So, I transitioned and don't regret it one bit.
06/29/2012
carenautilus carenautilus
I'm cis...mostly. I've got some agender in me, but not enough to identify as agender. For me, it's like gender roles are acting roles. They're fun to play and can teach me a lot about myself. But at the end of the day, I'm not *really* any of them.
07/01/2012
Roz W Roz W
I like genderqueer because of the fluidity. Sometimes I can't stand my perceived-gender, sometimes I'm fine with it, and sometimes I play it up.

I was trans-questioning at one point, but figured out that I don't really want to change my body. So depending on how you use the terms, I'm cissexual but not cisgendered.
07/01/2012
thekindthorn thekindthorn
I used to identify as female/gq, but I now identify as genderless. I feel that, no matter what gender label I use, I will always be the same person, so it really doesn't mean much to me in the way of identity. I am still very uncomfortable with being gendered as female, though, so it's odd to some.
I don't think changing your gender label many times is a bad thing. Gender can change throughout your life, and it's not shameful to be questioning or fluctuating.
07/08/2012
pestilence pestilence
As soon as I learned that trans* experience wasn't exclusively binary and genital-dependent, I knew that I wasn't cis, but I'm still not sure exactly where I'm at gender-wise. Right now I publicly identify as a binary trans man because that's just easier, but when I was first privately figuring things out I identified very much as genderqueer. For me the exact specifics of my gender aren't too important, though I did start anxiously questioning it again when I was reading up about certain binary trans men wanting to occupy women-only spaces. In the end I've come to the conclusion that binary or not, I'm not a woman and have no need to be a part of women's spaces, so I can continue on in my gender ambiguity for awhile longer.
07/13/2012
LoganAshlee. LoganAshlee.
I was sure I was a transman, until I started feeling feminine and wanting to wear dresses again. It was awkward to un come out!
02/04/2013
Genderfree Genderfree
Quote:
Originally posted by LoganAshlee.
I was sure I was a transman, until I started feeling feminine and wanting to wear dresses again. It was awkward to un come out!
Hey, there's nothing wrong with that! I'm a male crossdresser, too! Plus, when you're making clothing for others and don't have a dress form, you tend to use yourself if your friends are of similar size and shape..
02/05/2013
damnbul12 damnbul12
Quote:
Originally posted by lecanis
I've spoken to a lot of people about gender issues, and it always surprises me to hear that I'm not the only one who has spent a lot time questioning my gender. Before learning about labels like 'genderqueer', I went back and forth ... More
I've always known my gender.
02/05/2013
TransMarc TransMarc
Yes. It's complicated. Even now, I'm not so sure if I'm a man or something else.
02/06/2013
eroticmutt eroticmutt
I struggled for a long time.

As a very young child, I knew I was male and felt deep shame and terror knowing that I would be met with resistance and hostility from those close to me if I tried to talk about this most basic detail about myself. This is because I tried for so long and was met with nothing but frustration and struggles.

When I got older, I didn't think of it so much. I had a lot of issues but I was more 'gender-queer' I guess you could say. I saw myself as very different and it led me to feel a lot of anger and resentment against females.

When I met my current partner he was very understanding and helped me to realize that I could change things and that there were people who would still support me even if they knew me for who I really am.




This may be a rare experience for some, but I am a gay trans man and one of the hardest things for me is that before I transitioned I was regarded as very 'attractive + desirable' to straight and bisexual men. Now I find that there are MANY less gay men than straight to begin with even forgetting the fact that I am trans. It is very hard for me to get used to this in some ways and it has caused me some insecurity, although when someone DOES seem interested in me- wow does that bring back some good feelings!
02/07/2013
tortilla tortilla
never changed
02/08/2013
Schattenstern Schattenstern
I've always known I'm a guy, no matter what family and strangers have told me.
02/08/2013
Rab Rab
I spent my whole childhood and adolescence feeling like I didn't fit and in college I started to find a community with other butches, but it still wasn't right. It wasn't until I learned more about trans* and genderqueer people that I began to realize who I really was, and even then, it took a long time to come into my own.
02/21/2013
scaredlittleboy scaredlittleboy
Been bouncing around in various queer identities :p
02/21/2013
Aishiteru Aishiteru
I've always considered myself a female.
02/21/2013
SalmiakkiVodka SalmiakkiVodka
Before I learned about terms like 'genderqueer' I went back and forth a lot.

I knew what trans* was, but it probably wasn't until college that I learned that people identified as non-binary. I thought that you had to be either male or female, but I could never figure out which one I felt more and it caused me a lot of confusion and flip-flopping on my identity.
03/12/2013
Rivers Rivers
Before I knew what 'Transgender' or 'Transsexual' meant, I was always uncomfortable in my own skin. I always wanted to be one of the boys, and that was wrong, so I overcompensated, made myself as feminine as I could- because if I could be more feminine, then someday I'd be okay with my body, right?

Wrong. It clicked for me when I started researching terms like 'genderqueer' and 'transgender'. I've only changed my gender-identity once, but that doesn't mean I haven't considered changing it more times than that.

The people who knew straight away with no doubt, those people are very lucky. But not all of us were.
03/12/2013
atryonix atryonix
Nope
03/12/2013
needapacker needapacker
i put other because i dont totally understand the question. do you mean like changing it after beginning transitioning? Nope I've been calling myself male ever since i transitioned (and actually sometimes before i even knew what transsexualism was)
04/16/2013
IamKC IamKC
trans man but for a long time i ran from it
04/17/2013
Ilmenskie Ilmenskie
I IDed as genderqueer for like a month before I came to terms with IDing as male and started transitioning
05/07/2013
sunflower sunflower
I am female, born female. I kind of have some things like I liked to wear boy clothes and wished I could pull off looking like a boy and androgyny but I was too curvy. You have to have a ruler shaped body to pull androgyny off usually I think. Sometimes I feel like I want to be girl gay and guy gay at the same time if anyone gets that? In an ideal world I would probably just be me but with a dick. This technology does not exist (strap ons aren't good enough or what I mean!) so I think I am really ok with being female and this kind of stuff doesn't bother me enough to change my label or make me feel really bad or anything. I dress femininely and put on makeup for the most part lately.

I feel like that made no sense to anyone but me hahaha.
05/25/2013
alextge alextge
Quote:
Originally posted by lecanis
I've spoken to a lot of people about gender issues, and it always surprises me to hear that I'm not the only one who has spent a lot time questioning my gender. Before learning about labels like 'genderqueer', I went back and forth ... More
I think most people go through a lot of different labels when they're figuring things out
05/29/2013
Total posts: 30
Unique posters: 30