I don't bind anymore even during the day, because it hurted my back somewhat, made me breath differently though it was bearable, reduced my mobility too much. I feel weak wearing it. Once I had a panic attack and my heart went faster and faster, in a way and rhythm and at a tempo that was unusual for a panic attack and I felt it in my wrist, plus I was trying to stay calm but for some reason my heart started doing this! So I'm not sure if it was really a panic attack or something worse, because I had been emotionally disturbed but had not had panic attacks since a long time and this one was very different.
Also, people still think I'm a woman who bind when I've a binder, except some rare other trans* folks who don't assume my gender at all or correct themselves. Most people just assume and don't even ask, even those who are so fucking well aware of the existence of trans* people and who say "REALLY BUT IT'S A BOY'S NAME" when I tell them my name.
Maybe I just need to find someone with whom I could trade binders, mine for their too big one. Maybe it's too small. (also I know I've gotten bigger, maybe chest-wise and the fact I took muscle and fat and I think it was after I got the binder I did my last growth spurt, which made me a head taller than someone who had been just a bit shorter than me. I got my periods at 11 and for some reason I just finished growing recently and I'm not even sure I did.)