How do you deal with your dysphoria?

Contributor: xxjoel xxjoel
I'm asking trans men, trans women, and those of all or no gender.

I find, when I can get over my dysphoria enough to have it, that sex really helps. What do you guys do?
03/18/2012
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Contributor: GONE! GONE!
I... Cry and feel gross, and try to distract myself. I don't really cope I guess. =/ Doing something sexual helps for me too if I can do it with someone.
03/18/2012
Contributor: hatman hatman
Yeah, hahaha
I cry and try to distract myself too
and drink tea

Unfortunately, sex doesn't help me :/
03/18/2012
Contributor: eroticmutt eroticmutt
I like to work out every single day. I focus on doing cardio, because the less fat someone has, the less feminine curves they tend to have- especially around the back of the hip area. And I focus on making my shoulders/arms/lats as big as I can, as well as working on very prominent obliques, because you don't really see females with an "adonis belt".

Having a more masculine body shape and muscle structure really makes me feel a lot better, and so does putting on my binder and other stuff, and just looking at myself in the mirror. Doing the best I can is a lot better, to force out the negative images I have built up in my life.
03/18/2012
Contributor: u u
I call my best friend. He can always make me giggle. If he's not available, I go on this facebook page that posts amazing black humor jokes, or recite my favorites in my head until I feel better.
03/18/2012
Contributor: Ciao. Ciao.
Sex doesn't always help, sometimes I just need to make sure that I get myself really wrapped up in other tasks, work, etc. If I can keep busy usually I can move past the dysphoria and I'm in a better place later.
03/18/2012
Contributor: TheParrishism TheParrishism
I usually distract myself with Netflix and cuddling in blankets and pillows. I like to disappear. Sex tends to make me focus on it more. Any other tips would be nice. Cuddling helps a lot.
03/18/2012
Contributor: GONE! GONE!
Quote:
Originally posted by TheParrishism
I usually distract myself with Netflix and cuddling in blankets and pillows. I like to disappear. Sex tends to make me focus on it more. Any other tips would be nice. Cuddling helps a lot.
I like the Netflix and blankets idea. I think there should be a master list of dysphoria coping ideas to pass around. That would be awesome.
03/19/2012
Contributor: butts butts
Working out/exercising helps, especially since I feel like it's helping me sculpt a more masculine body.

And, I cut my hair and shave my peach fuzz when I'm feeling extra shitty. I get rid of the fuzz not for the sensation of shaving, but just to get RID of it since most males don't get soft fuzz on their cheeks and chin. I swear every time I get SUPER dysphoric I cut off a little more hair. I'll be bald if I don't start T soon (which fortunately I am) hahah.
03/19/2012
Contributor: TheParrishism TheParrishism
Quote:
Originally posted by GONE!
I like the Netflix and blankets idea. I think there should be a master list of dysphoria coping ideas to pass around. That would be awesome.
That would be really useful. From time to time, my old coping methods don't work because they remind me of the last time I freaked out. I am always in need of new ones.
03/19/2012
Contributor: Rab Rab
all of this
cry, get a haircut, shave, get a blowjob, eat too much, cry some more...
03/21/2012
Contributor: Lock Lock
Therapy.
03/23/2012
Contributor: MasonM MasonM
Quote:
Originally posted by xxjoel
I'm asking trans men, trans women, and those of all or no gender.

I find, when I can get over my dysphoria enough to have it, that sex really helps. What do you guys do?
I avoid mirrors. I've been known to self-mutilate. I get aggressively masculine, as if I'm 'proving' to myself that I'm a guy. Sometimes I get stupidly misogynistic, which is one of the worst things I can do.
03/23/2012
Contributor: MistressDandelion MistressDandelion
Forcing my husband to grow a beard, and play with it as if it was my own. Also, I'm kind of quite of a contradiction. I deal with dysphoria by dressing so effeminate and putting on so much make-up I actually look like a drag queen. It usually soothes me.
03/24/2012
Contributor: Voir Voir
I don't think I have dysphoria... I completely hate having breasts and sometimes am extremely annoyed or frustrated about my body but for the most part it isn't something I think about. I'm very good at willfully ignoring some things and for the most part they don't bother me mentally it's just fucking annoying. Especially when there are people I would be attracted to as a male but are only attracted to me because of female anatomy. It's all annoying but I don't think it qualifies for dysphoria at all.
03/24/2012
Contributor: TheParrishism TheParrishism
Quote:
Originally posted by MasonM
I avoid mirrors. I've been known to self-mutilate. I get aggressively masculine, as if I'm 'proving' to myself that I'm a guy. Sometimes I get stupidly misogynistic, which is one of the worst things I can do.
I tend to avoid mirrors too. I am worried because I am moving into an apartment next year that has huge mirror doors over the closet. I don't really like seeing myself that much. I will have to find some way to cover them.
03/24/2012
Contributor: TransMarc TransMarc
Avoid mirrors. Don't look down my body. If I look my own body, concentrate on clothes or products (if in the bathroom, thankfully I have strong myopia, so it isn't so much a problem as I don't really see my body that well...) and list ie. varieties of wool or soap brands. Avoid touching my breasts o waistline or hips.
Put on my binder. Get angry or sad. Cry. Sometimes I have panic attacks. Imagining myself being an asshole to the cispeople who have bodies I'd like to have or that I wouldn't like to have but wouldn't feel dysphoria in, telling them they are ugly as fuck. Self-harming. Watch movies. Music. Listening to music and singing. Stay in bed. Not moving. Running around, crying.
Read books. Trans* poetry and writings online, even those not from FTM.
It depends on the level of dysphoria. Usually I just avoid mirrors, avoid paying attention to my body, put on my binder, distract myself.
03/30/2012
Contributor: MasonM MasonM
Quote:
Originally posted by TheParrishism
I tend to avoid mirrors too. I am worried because I am moving into an apartment next year that has huge mirror doors over the closet. I don't really like seeing myself that much. I will have to find some way to cover them.
Cover them with pictures that are self-affirming, maybe? I used to take pictures of myself looking as masculine as possible (easier before I got pregnant and my breasts swelled insanely) and post them around my room instead of actually looking at myself in the mirror.
03/30/2012
Contributor: DarthTaco DarthTaco
I pray :'P, then I remind myself that it will eventually get better. I then spend whatever time I can formulating a plan as to how it will get better. It's how I cope with everything XP. Better than when I use to pop pills @_@.
03/31/2012
Contributor: thisisadeletedaccount thisisadeletedaccount
Sometimes sex helps, but it depends... Sometimes it just makes me more aware of the body parts I don't want, and being alone and doing breathing exercises or just getting a hug is better. Recently I ran into a post on Tumblr that contained the word "dysphorny," for describing that frustrating state when you're both dysphoric and horny. Having a silly word for it helped, in a strange sort of way.
05/18/2012
Contributor: Youssii Youssii
I spend time around other trans people (preferably my best friend, or the person I'm shagging). They're really the only people I feel confident to still see me as me if I take my binder off, and it's comforting/reassuring to have that common experience.
05/18/2012
Contributor: Phosphorous Tick Phosphorous Tick
I stay away from anything that can remind me of what my gender is. I don't let anyone touch me and I try to envision myself as the person I want to be as opposed to the person I am
I snap at people, I force the name Vincent and the word Male so far down their throats that sometimes i'm surprised when they don't cough out my fingers afterwards- which is odd because I'm really quite docile.
My dysphoria is usually triggered by words as opposed to my body but as soon as it starts my body does become a trigger and sadly you can't really avoid both.
Writing poetry helps, talking to my girlfriend helps (she calls me her boyfriend and... I really love that about her.)
05/25/2012
Contributor: shcoo shcoo
I play dress-up. But usually it's dressing up as my favorite male celebrities, haha. Focusing on qualities I may have in common with them makes me feel better.

I also try to remove myself from situations where people misgender me, because I will snap at them and start an argument if I'm already feeling dysphoric.
05/25/2012
Contributor: K101 K101
Quote:
Originally posted by xxjoel
I'm asking trans men, trans women, and those of all or no gender.

I find, when I can get over my dysphoria enough to have it, that sex really helps. What do you guys do?
It isn't a condition that affects me, but I'd probably go out and surround myself with loved ones in hopes to cheer me up and distract from anxiety or negative feelings.
05/25/2012
Contributor: vitriolicvertigo vitriolicvertigo
On days where I feel really masculine but I can't express that, I dress SUPER feminine. Either I feel pretty enough that it just doesn't matter or I pretend that I'm a fierce drag queen.
With chest dysphoria, though, there's nothing I've found that I can really do (I'm a small-framed person with a 30G chest). That's why I'm getting partial top surgery soon.
I don't have hardly any bottom dysphoria, but occasionally I'll pack and just feeling that there's something there makes me feel better.
05/28/2012
Contributor: canislytherin canislytherin
I talk to my best friend, listen to music, or sing.
05/29/2012