What, if any, is your level of familiarity with the transgendered community?

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What, if any, is your level of familiarity with the transgendered community?

LucyLemonade LucyLemonade
Quote:
Originally posted by Luscious Lily
I'm glad that the two of you have found yourselves able to work through this together with love. It's never easy. Thanks for the book reference, I'm going to have to go find that one and pass it on!
There is also another book I haven't read, "My Husband Betty" by Helen Boyd as well.
03/05/2010
Anthony C Anthony C
I'm trying to understand...I saw a post that said, psychologically speaking, some identify themselves as the opposite sex therefore…they are...or identify themselves as so.

I know, I’m more literal then many, but I was under the impression that genitals, organs, hormones, skeletal structure, reproductive systems etc., it’s what defines us as man or woman.

Language is based upon definition…so are we going to change the definition of a man or woman? I could care less if we do or don’t…I’m just curious.
06/23/2010
El-Jaro El-Jaro
Quote:
Originally posted by Anthony C
I'm trying to understand...I saw a post that said, psychologically speaking, some identify themselves as the opposite sex therefore…they are...or identify themselves as so.

I know, I’m more literal then many, but I was under the impression ...
That seems to be the biggest hurdle for that group and those who support them.

I think it's more of a gender identity vs. physiology idea. It's also about the struggle with one group trying to promote education of their differences so the larger group doesn't discriminate (at best) or worse against them.

Buck Angel, Sir, and Misha's Amusements have really educated me (directly and indirectly) on this. I've learned a lot and am more than happy to be wrong if I learn something new.
06/23/2010
Luscious Lily Luscious Lily
Quote:
Originally posted by Anthony C
I'm trying to understand...I saw a post that said, psychologically speaking, some identify themselves as the opposite sex therefore…they are...or identify themselves as so.

I know, I’m more literal then many, but I was under the impression ...
As the daughter of a transwoman, let me see if I can clarify this a bit. What you've described, the physiological elements, is the person's sex (female, male, etc). The way they identify is their gender (man, woman, and a whole slew of others). This is often confusing to people because, for the majority of the population, their gender and sex match up; these people are sometimes referred to as "cisgendered". People whose gender identity does not match up with their physiology are sometimes called "transgendered", "transsexual", or just "trans" (the most inclusive, least likely to offend term). Because they so often match up, most people end up using sex and gender interchangeably when they are in fact different concepts.

It's not so much a case of changing the definition of "man" or "woman" as it is being more precise in our terminology. Man and Woman refer to gender identifications, as do Boi, Grrl, and Queer. Male, female, and the intersex spectrum are some examples of sex. This can be very confusing for people used to using gender and sex interchangeably.

Here's an example to illustrate. My transgendered parent was born with a body that was physiologically male (the sex). However, she was also born with a the mind of a girl, now a woman (the gender identity). She identifies as a woman, and is undergoing a medical transition to make her body match up with who she is "inside." This does not mean that she is a man that identifies as a woman. This makes her a male-bodied person who identifies as a woman.

I hope I've been able to help clear up the confusion.
06/23/2010
El-Jaro El-Jaro
"Middlesex" is one of my favorite books.

If anyone in the Trans community has read it, is it an accurate story in relation to your experiences?
06/23/2010
Ptery P. Lieght Ptery P. Lieght
Quote:
Originally posted by Luscious Lily
My father came out to my mother and I as transgendered in the past few months. (I'll continue referring to my dad as "him" for now, at his request) Unlike many similar situations I've heard about, their marriage didn't fall ...
I'm so happy for you. It means a lot to me that there are families out there that keep themselves together. To me it is not right to throw someone out. If one loved someone, they love their soul first, body or presentation second. This whole orientation thing gets to me. I think people get attracted to certain people for more that their body. Geesh.

I'm also happy that your dad and mom can stay together. It is so hurtful to children when their parents part, even though sometimes it's nessesary and people do heal.
06/24/2010
Ptery P. Lieght Ptery P. Lieght
Quote:
Originally posted by Gabe
Hey Perish-
I totally like where your head is at, in terms of accepting people regardless of what gender they may identify with, and what body they may have been born with. A couple things, though--

First, being transgendered is pretty ...
And about women having multiple orgasms, well, Men can learn how too!!
See this book-
link
06/25/2010
Ptery P. Lieght Ptery P. Lieght
Thanks to all who posted. This was refreshing to be on an educational forum like this with many open minded folks. I'm FTM and have been in transition for 1 3/4 years now. What a journey, not so bad as many people I know. I have many an ancestor in the community to thank for breaking so much ground on trail.
I've a friend who I would like to be partnered with, but my life is in motion still and I don't know where I'll land. Coming out opened up more than one closet for me and I'm on two journeys now that are both mind blowing, so it isn't fair to make commitments until I really know where I stand. But I do love her just the same.
For all those people who aren't transgendered or transsexual, keep the mind open for a long time cause this whole movement is about not thinking in boxes.
Much love to ya'all.
06/25/2010
Sir Sir
Quote:
Originally posted by El-Jaro
"Middlesex" is one of my favorite books.

If anyone in the Trans community has read it, is it an accurate story in relation to your experiences?
I have read it, actually, and I really liked it too! The main character is not trans-, however, he's intersexed. In general, the intersex experience, however, is very similar to trans- experience, but that all depends on the personal case. Was it similar to mine personally? No, not really, but I do not think that the story was far-fetched at all.
06/25/2010
Neila Neila
Quote:
Originally posted by Not Here Anymore f/k/a Happy Lady
After my recent forum post asking for assistance in writing reviews involving my transgendered partner, I wondered how many Eden participants actually know a transgendered person - and if so, how.

This is something that is part of my daily ...
I've had three trans male lovers. They are a gateway drug; they really are
06/25/2010
Neila Neila
One particular trans man is my favorite by far

Hi, Ptery <3
06/25/2010
Neila Neila
Woah, hey! I've got a pile o' humpy lady bugs for my [apparently randomly selected generic] Avatar. Who knew!
06/25/2010
Neila Neila
Whew! Now that i can be 'Neila' here (like in FetLife) I can come right out and say, yes, in fact, I am trans. {Yeah, I checked about three boxes on your poll. ;-}

Thank you for asking. My former lover sent a link to this discussion—suggesting it was good reading, and I agree with him. This is a great thread

At a gender support meeting, I met a trans man early in his transition. We're both Musicians (I play Celtic harp, and he sings and drums). We did a recording session (I'm a Podcaster). We were drawn to each other and we slept together. I feel comfortable in lesbian relationship, but I was afraid to love him because I didn't know if I could be in relationship with a man. I knew this was his path. It was like my own; I knew how committed he was. We said goodbye, and he left town

Then, nine months later, he came back into my life, and we were partnered for half-a-year (until he left town again). This was new to me, and I'm not over it, but there was a lot of discovery going on. {And men are so frustrating!}

The point of telling this little story is that it was a personal hurdle for me to 'walk my talk' that gender doesn't matter. I had to experience him again emotionally for me to realize that this person's gender is less important than the feelings I have for him

For society to change, EVERYONE will have to go through this to some degree. I don't have the answer—just this minor epiphany as to understanding "the actual question." (Douglas Adams)
06/25/2010
kingdiver kingdiver
This has been a very interesting post. Thank you everyone. I happen to be trans (ftm) and I have a girlfriend who is hot, but she's not with me at the moment and my constant travels may keep us apart unless I can figure out how to travel for two. It's good to hear all the discussion. My main frame of reference is to have as few frames as possible and take folks one at a time and don't judge anything until I've quizzed them on why they do what they do, cause even behavior can't be judged until one understands the intent behind it.
06/25/2010
Darling Jen Darling Jen
If I hadn't mentioned it yet, I will announce it for all of yall: I love Eden Fantasys! The trans community is small and mostly "stealth" so it's hard to come together as a group and even harder to find a place that keeps them in mind, like dilating or packing for instance. It's so wonderful here.

I've known quite a few trans people personally and from a distance and my partner is trans. And if you don't know one yet, reach out! They're wonderful friends to have and you could be an ally as well!
07/23/2010
♥ Amanda ♥ ♥ Amanda ♥
I have seen people announce they are, watched porn stars that are, but have never had someone tell me to my face they are. So not sure if I have every met a transgender person, I am sure I have. But a person is a person, so that really isn't important to me.
07/23/2010
Midway through Midway through
I don't know anyone personally. I have seen them, I have been around them. I am not familiar with terminology even in the slightest. I am totally fine with it and don't think any about it. There is a guy turned girl that we know in our pagan community, I have spoken to her, and I learned that she wants to be called a she, so I don't think of her as anything else.
08/11/2010
Kinkyquing Kinkyquing
I'm transgender (genderqueer, or if I must use an acronym, FTWTF) and have a couple close trans/genderqueer friends.
08/17/2010
RosesThorns RosesThorns
I have dated a trans person before, and my father is trans (although we don't really speak often anymore so I have no idea whats going on with 'him' *sad*)
08/20/2010
Selective Sensualist Selective Sensualist
I have stood in to observe a gender reassignment surgery. It was a female-to-male surgery (which is much more difficult to perform than male-to-female) and it took many hours to complete.

The surgeon who performed the surgery is quite passionate about his work and about helping his patients attain the external appearance that reflects their identity. He does not use any type of prosthetics at all in performing his technique, choosing instead to work only with the tissue that is already present on the female anatomy to construct a penis.

I do know that all of the patients on whom he has performed surgery had previously lived as males for several years and had identified as males since childhood. Most of them are in committed relationships with partners who fully support their decision.
08/31/2010
Selective Sensualist Selective Sensualist
Quote:
Originally posted by Sir
I have read it, actually, and I really liked it too! The main character is not trans-, however, he's intersexed. In general, the intersex experience, however, is very similar to trans- experience, but that all depends on the personal case. Was ...
Middlesex is one of my very favorite books of all time, too!
08/31/2010
Selective Sensualist Selective Sensualist
Quote:
Originally posted by Selective Sensualist
I have stood in to observe a gender reassignment surgery. It was a female-to-male surgery (which is much more difficult to perform than male-to-female) and it took many hours to complete.

The surgeon who performed the surgery is quite ...
Sorry, I forgot to specify that the surgery to which I was referring was a "bottom" surgery. I also observed two "top" surgeries on two different patients a few weeks prior to the "bottom" surgery.

The plastic surgeon said that the patients on whom he performed these types of surgeries are his very favorite of patients. They are always so warm, gracious, and incredibly grateful, making his work very rewarding.
08/31/2010
Selective Sensualist Selective Sensualist
[So sorry, but I made a post on the wrong thread -- I had meant to post a toy request on the "Eden Should Carry" discussion thread. My apologies that I am unable to delete this post entirely, but I am cutting and pasting the comment I had accidentally posted here to the appropriate thread.]
09/02/2010
Trashley Trashley
I had the BIGGEST crush on a trans boy.. unfortunately we were both too shy and ran in different circles so nothing really came of it. My friend's dated a trans boy too, actually (different one). I like to stay close with all parts on the queer community. If only my crush came to the queer center more often...
10/09/2010
Serendipity Serendipity
Quote:
Originally posted by Not Here Anymore f/k/a Happy Lady
After my recent forum post asking for assistance in writing reviews involving my transgendered partner, I wondered how many Eden participants actually know a transgendered person - and if so, how.

This is something that is part of my daily ...
I know many transgendered folks and have been involved with/close friend of more than one.
10/10/2010
Miss Voluptuous Miss Voluptuous
Quote:
Originally posted by Not Here Anymore f/k/a Happy Lady
After my recent forum post asking for assistance in writing reviews involving my transgendered partner, I wondered how many Eden participants actually know a transgendered person - and if so, how.

This is something that is part of my daily ...
I live in a city that is rather queer-friendly, and I think that raising awareness & acceptance for trans people is "the next step".
10/10/2010
Madeira Madeira
I dated a male bodied genderqueer person for 2 1/2 years, and I have lots of transgendered friends who I love muchly. I myself am genderqueer, as is my current girlfriend.
10/12/2010
Onanist Onanist
My daughter in law's bother is transitioning to become male. I only see him during holidays and special occasions, but I've definitely seen a change in him since he started hormone treatments a while back. His voice has gotten deeper, his chest is smaller and he's grown hair on his legs and arms.

He truly wants to be identified as a male. He's told his niece and nephew to stop calling him Aunt Jessica and to call him Uncle Jessie instead. Before he started transitioning, I used to give him and his girlfriend the family hug and kiss greeting. Then one day, I tried to hug and kiss him, but he just gave me the bro hug. I took the hint and now we greet each other with either a hand shake or bro hug.

I see him as a person and treat him and his girlfriend (female) with the same respect as any family member.
10/15/2010
sasweetheart89 sasweetheart89
I have absolutely no interaction with the transgendered community and i wish that would change! i wish i could broaden my horizons in this way
10/15/2010
UrNaughtyaAngel UrNaughtyaAngel
I do not know no transgendered person.But I am learning so much by what everyone has posted and Luscious Lily your mom is awesome and so is the rest of your family as well. Your father is very bless to have you all be so supportive. Love the bra story. And your sister what a cutie, love is love no matter what.
10/18/2010
Total posts: 213
Unique posters: 138