Dear Contributors

I'm totally anti-symbol/checkbox/c lutter.

Mostly because I think it's the epitome of laziness to expect everything to be put right there in front of you with no effort required on your part - despite asking very busy staff to reconfigure the whole bloody site for your convenience.

I also loathe having to choose someone else's descriptors to describe myself and my relationship.

And I REALLY dislike the idea of this turning into some sort of crazy MySpace for sex toys. *shudder* less

I'm with you on that. I used to enjoy networking sites years ago because I could find old friends... but it's an idea that becomes stale or a place where I notice people group together and get cliquey. The last thing we want to do here is exclude contributors. This is a welcoming community and we need to remain sex positive because there are people from all walks of life here... and I can't even limit myself to saying people because we may have a few furries browsing the site as well, etc.

By putting more information on our profile it ultimately reduces the amount of contact we have with our contributors. If someone is curious about me than please read my reviews, my blog, and by all means- EMAIL ME!!! I'd love to receive an email asking me questions about myself or clarification on terms I used on my reviews as it encourages connections to be made between reviewers and reviewers/customers. less

(This is posted under this category because I don't see a place for it otherwise)

Dear NEW Contributors,

Welcome to the community. My experiences with EdenFantasys have been very good. I came looking for a sex toy and found not only a sex toy, but wide diversity of people interested in sex - like me! I started reading the forums, and began learning about lots of different types of orientations, genders, uses of toys, relationships, and more. The forums opened my eyes to words and phrases I had never heard, and my overall knowledge of sexual interactions greatly increased.

If you have not spent much time doing so, you should go read forum posts/ reviews/profiles of people who are different than you in gender and/or sexual orientation. You will find a wide variety of contributors here at Eden and it will expand your knowledge. I think you will also see the following common themes here at Eden:

1. There is no such thing as "normal" when it comes to sex, love, gender, orientation, or anything really. As a community, we try to ensure that everyone knows that and are careful to not use the word "normal" in reference to a sexual act. After all, what is "normal sex" to me and what is "normal sex" to you could be entirely different acts.

2. We have the option of writing in our gender and sexual orientation on our profiles. This is so that we may describe ourselves with words WE pick - rather than being forced to check a box. There are many many MANY contributors who do have neither "male or female" listed as a gender nor "straight, gay, lesbian, bi" as an orientation. This is another way the EdenFantasys company allows us to feel comfortable being ourselves.

I am speaking only for me when I say the following:

A. Please refrain from asking the contributors (via asking Eden) to designate our genders/orientations with some symbol, or "none of the above" on our reviews. (This seems to keep being asked by several people lately.) This information is easily accessible on our contributor profiles. If you don't understand a word that is given as an answer to "gender" or "orientation", just look it up. Wiki is pretty good at giving descriptions.

B. If you don't understand a toy category/use/function, just ask. I'm willing to bet my next free toy that no contributor will be offended if you ask about a reviewed product. There are lots of uses for sex toys that you may never even considered. Please don't make review comments/forum posts in which you judge the way a toy is used as "incorrect" or "dishonest."

I'm asking this of you because whatever you write here is for all of us to see, and, you are unwittingly excluding very good people with some of your statements.



Dear OLD Contributors (...lol...)
When you consider voting for new advanced level contributors, please take the time to see if they are excluding in their reviews/comments/forum posts. We really don't need that here. Although I would hope such excluding behavior will slow down after this post. less

Good post! One of the most important things in a community like this is open-mindedness... However, a truly open mind takes a lot of care and self-consciousness to nurture. I remember when I was in high school, I thought I was the most sexually liberal person around (in terms of being open-minded towards different sexual orientations, practices, etc.). Now I look back on that younger self and cringe. There was so much that I thought was "wrong" back then that I now know are just more, perfectly acceptable, personal choices.

I don't think we should necessarily shun anyone for slipping once in a while. Of course, if a reviewer shows a scary trend towards close-mindedness and is unwilling to respond to (for the lack of a better word) reprimand and guidance in the right direction, then it's a different story altogether. less

Thank you.


I am not directing this post to any particular person/post/comment, etc. This is more of a heads-up on the type of community we really are in light of several recent word choices by more than a couple of people.

Shunning is certainly not within anything I would suggest. In fact, when I read a certain comment in a certain review, I messaged the reviewer with my concerns. That reviewer thanked me for giving the heads up.

I hope that people read this and, instead of feeling bad or like they have been reprimanded, they realize the wealth of information available here and, as Pink so stated: Look, learn, ask before they make comments/posts, etc. less

Thank you.


I am not directing this post to any particular person/post/comment, etc. This is more of a heads-up on the type of community we really are in light of several recent word choices by more than a couple of people.

Shunning is certainly not within anything I would suggest. In fact, when I read a certain comment in a certain review, I messaged the reviewer with my concerns. That reviewer thanked me for giving the heads up.

I hope that people read this and, instead of feeling bad or like they have been reprimanded, they realize the wealth of information available here and, as Pink so stated: Look, learn, ask before they make comments/posts, etc. less

Good post! One of the most important things in a community like this is open-mindedness... However, a truly open mind takes a lot of care and self-consciousness to nurture. I remember when I was in high school, I thought I was the most sexually liberal person around (in terms of being open-minded towards different sexual orientations, practices, etc.). Now I look back on that younger self and cringe. There was so much that I thought was "wrong" back then that I now know are just more, perfectly acceptable, personal choices.

I don't think we should necessarily shun anyone for slipping once in a while. Of course, if a reviewer shows a scary trend towards close-mindedness and is unwilling to respond to (for the lack of a better word) reprimand and guidance in the right direction, then it's a different story altogether. less

I'm totally anti-symbol/checkbox/c lutter.

Mostly because I think it's the epitome of laziness to expect everything to be put right there in front of you with no effort required on your part - despite asking very busy staff to reconfigure the whole bloody site for your convenience.

I also loathe having to choose someone else's descriptors to describe myself and my relationship.

And I REALLY dislike the idea of this turning into some sort of crazy MySpace for sex toys. *shudder* less

Trust me, every year that goes by you'll look back and cringe, you're only 19 so there will be a lot of cringing to come. I still do that and I'm certain I will until the day I die, whenever that day comes... my guess is sooner rather than later with the amount of alcohol I drink on a daily basis.

This community is incredibly open, however, with large groups of people will be some elitism which rears its ugly head every so often as well as arguments in the forums (let's not rehash) where contributors have ganged up on one another. The last thing we want to do is seperate older members from newer members because in truth, we're all connected and should not be divided... Dildo Lovers Unite!

I don't think we should reprimand anyone here, if anything, we can be a resource for people just discovering all the many facets to sexuality based subjects. If anyone ever has an issue with another reviewer than it's always appropriate to email the contributor. If the email goes unnoticed and they continue to act in ways that are malicious to the positive growth of the community then I hope that person who takes offense would privately email someone at Eden who can handle the situation.

I think this is a great post because it's opening the lines of communication, problems never get resolved unless someone says something. The last thing we want to do here is alienate any members so a discussion is good to have if it remains courteous for all people engaged in it. less