Are you a feminist?

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Are you a feminist?

sillylilkitten sillylilkitten
Do you identify as a feminist? Why or why not?
Answers (public voting - your screen name will appear in the results):
Yes
LuckyLady , Living Doll , amplified to rock , TheirPet , Robespierrethecat , PDXlady , kitty1949 , GS500 , Septimus , Livia Drew , chernayavdova , gordianii , Raymaker , roskat , phoenixfire , Rod Ronald , GirlOnGirl , Sera26 , Pink Lily , wildshores , elli , Lildrummrgurl7 , KinkyNicki92 , sillylilkitten , K101 , GONE! , heather-mooney , Tangles , Creepellah , Yaoi Pervette (deleted) , Adriana Ravenlust , hem , dks210
33  (46%)
No
Pururin , Bleu , Bethy Cassatt , hhh , Incendiaire , - Kira - , Melan!e , darthkitt3n , Gunsmoke , hjtee , misterazor , Kirill1171 , Marie Hanna , Voir , thesexiebunnie , Geogeo , padmeamidala , Andrey2052
18  (25%)
I don't know enough about feminism to decide
deltalima , BrittaniMaree , kkizzee05
3  (4%)
It's more complicated than that, let me explain...
ARPKasso , Supervixen , solitudinarian , SneakersAndPearls , Kissy , bayosgirl , kdlt , aluminummm , AwesomeAmanda , LoooveMonkey , indiglo , null , ginnyluvspotter , Missmarc , ViVix , darkr , edeneve , hyacinthgirl
18  (25%)
Total votes: 72
Poll is closed
12/26/2012
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LuckyLady LuckyLady
absolutely
12/26/2012
ARPKasso ARPKasso
I don't identify as a feminist, but I do agree and support a lot of things they are trying to do. But I do feel like I would like to identify as one, but I have my own reasons for not going all the way with that mindset.
12/26/2012
Supervixen Supervixen
I don't consider myself a feminist, even when my beliefs align with feminist beliefs, which is often. I have too many issues with how feminism has evolved over the years, and I don't think it's always been beneficial for women. It's complicated...very complicated for me. In short though, I don't think feminism has always done a good job of valuing traditional female roles or accepting that a lot of women are comfortable with those roles, and I think that male roles and identity got lost in the shuffle along the way, and with my generation, I think there is a direct correlation with how we have turned out, our attitudes and perceptions, and the break down of family dynamics. I don't think that women should just be at home moms or house wives if they don't want to be--especially since that life doesn't appeal to me at all. But I do think a lot of women feel pressured to be "Wonder Woman" and do it all--have the education, successful career, marriage, kids, extra-curricular "mom activities" and every adult responsibility you can imagine, because if you don't want that, then you don't appreciate what women in the generations before you had to suffer and sacrifice to give you the right. It's less about what women can do in society these days that I have a problem with (because I take full advantage of it, happily, and believe we should be able to do so), and more about the general outlook that I don't like.

I could go on and on about it, but...I probably better not. That's my perception in a nutshell.
12/26/2012
SneakersAndPearls SneakersAndPearls
Quote:
Originally posted by Supervixen
I don't consider myself a feminist, even when my beliefs align with feminist beliefs, which is often. I have too many issues with how feminism has evolved over the years, and I don't think it's always been beneficial for women. It's ...
I agree with a lot of this, but I can't figure out if I'm a feminist or not. I think I would say I am not a feminist in the way that modern society has come to view it.

I was reading an article the other day by a well-known feminist who said she felt "betrayed" when women she knew choose to be full-time wives/mothers. She was outraged that someone could want that, and they should "know better." Unfortunately, that's the way feminism is now seen. Feminism, from what I understand, was about choice and equality, but the most vocal feminists lately have a slightly different message: "You have choices, but let me tell you what to choose because I know what's best for you. If you don't choose what I tell you, you aren't a feminist."

I guess what I'm saying is this: I don't care if you work. I don't care if you stay home. I don't care if you wear high heels to bake cookies or if you run barefoot through the forest. Do what you will, just understand why you are doing it. Do it because it fits you, not because you feel pressured.

Personally, I am one of those full time wives/mothers. I didn't plan it that way, it just happened. Yes, I've heard obnoxious cracks about how I "wasted" money on an education. That's their view. To me, no matter what, education can never be considered a waste. I am where I am and do what I do because it fits who I am at this stage of my life.

Now, as for equal pay, equal rights, protection from domestic violence, having a choice in education and whether or not they work, I'm all for it. I'm all about equal rights. However, I'm not OK with someone else's view of what is "correct" being shoved down my throat.

I will say this: The next old man that suggests that I went to college to get my M.R.S. degree is likely to get punched in the face.
12/26/2012
Living Doll Living Doll
I consider myself a feminist, yes.
12/26/2012
Pururin Pururin
I'm not a feminist. I believe in equality though, and it annoys me when I see girls using their gender as an excuse for something.
I think women and men should have equal rights and job opportunities. It annoys me that people make a stink when a man hits a woman (which is understandable), but no one cares when a woman hits a man. Violence is violence.
I do agree with and support feminists though, especially their stand on fighting rape culture. It frustrates me that in this day and age politicians are still debating women's rights in this country too.
12/26/2012
Supervixen Supervixen
Quote:
Originally posted by SneakersAndPearls
I agree with a lot of this, but I can't figure out if I'm a feminist or not. I think I would say I am not a feminist in the way that modern society has come to view it.

I was reading an article the other day by a well-known feminist ...
See, THAT is exactly what I hate about a lot of feminist perspectives. A feminist feels "betrayed" when a woman becomes a stay at home mother? Well, tough shit, lady! Just because I have a vagina, it doesn't mean that I signed some oath to lead my life the way you think I should because of your personal political beliefs. How is that any less oppressive than being pigeonholed into traditional female roles? Those types of feminists really don't value feminine qualities, and just want women to be like men (signifying that they really do think men are more capable, worthwhile and "better" in some sense), only somehow superhuman. I don't understand why they don't value motherhood--you're raising the next generation of people, for crying out loud. Being a mother is one of the toughest and most important roles a person could ever have. Why people scoff at women who take on that role fully, is beyond me.
12/26/2012
SneakersAndPearls SneakersAndPearls
Quote:
Originally posted by Supervixen
See, THAT is exactly what I hate about a lot of feminist perspectives. A feminist feels "betrayed" when a woman becomes a stay at home mother? Well, tough shit, lady! Just because I have a vagina, it doesn't mean that I signed some oath ...
Why, haven't you heard? Motherhood isn't "real" work and you can't consider yourself an adult if that's your full time "job."

I really wish I had made that up, but that sentiment was being preached in an article by a very militant feminist who was saying that stay-at-home moms make the "war on women" possible. Yeah...OK, sure.

Apparently, I read too much. Wait, does that mean that being a *gasp* housewife has not shrunk my brain?

For these reasons I say I'm for equality, but I'm not necessarily a feminist. Feminism originally, from the way I understand it, was not what it is, or at the very least, not the way it is currently perceived.
12/26/2012
Kissy Kissy
I believe in equal rights. .. I am not a feminist.
12/26/2012
charmedtomeetyou charmedtomeetyou
Quote:
Originally posted by Kissy
I believe in equal rights. .. I am not a feminist.
this..exactly....

I use the word feminism occasionally....but at the core of the issue is really equality.
12/26/2012
TheirPet TheirPet
Everybody should be a feminist. It benefits all genders.
12/26/2012
GS500 GS500
Yes, at lest by modern standards
12/26/2012
PDXlady PDXlady
I don't think that a lot of you are actually understanding what the core of feminism is. Just because someone who identifies as a feminist said that she felt "betrayed" by women who conform to traditional gender roles that doesn't mean that that is what feminism is about. Feminism is all about choice, the choice to wear makeup and high heels, or the choice to cut all of your hair off and wear sneakers. Neither of those is inferior if it is freely chosen. A woman can conform to every single gender role and still be an amazing feminist.

Also feminism is all about equality for both genders so I don't know why anyone would say that they are not a feminism for believing in that. That is literally the entire point of feminism.
12/26/2012
bayosgirl bayosgirl
As in believing women deserve equal pay and treatment in the workforce? Absolutely.
12/26/2012
Septimus Septimus
Completely, absolutely 100% feminist over here.
12/26/2012
Livia Drew Livia Drew
I'm a feminist. A big one. But I wasn't always. I actually just wrote a SexIs article about a small part of this discussion. Would be much obliged to anyone who checks it out and shares their own opinions. link
12/26/2012
kdlt kdlt
Generally an equalist, although I don't like labels in that regard.
12/26/2012
Supervixen Supervixen
Quote:
Originally posted by PDXlady
I don't think that a lot of you are actually understanding what the core of feminism is. Just because someone who identifies as a feminist said that she felt "betrayed" by women who conform to traditional gender roles that doesn't ...
No, we understand. A lot of feminists, really loud prominent feminists, do not have that attitude that you are talking about. Maybe in theory, but not in practice. I see it, read it, and hear it all the time, and am less concerned with theory and more with actual practice. I have other issues with feminism than the condescending attitudes that many inflict upon women for being any kind of feminine in a traditional sense, in any case. I support equal rights, opportunities and respect regardless of gender, but I still am adamantly not a feminist.
12/26/2012
SneakersAndPearls SneakersAndPearls
Quote:
Originally posted by PDXlady
I don't think that a lot of you are actually understanding what the core of feminism is. Just because someone who identifies as a feminist said that she felt "betrayed" by women who conform to traditional gender roles that doesn't ...
Unfortunately, not everyone sees it that way. If you went to 50 different self-identifying feminist and asked them to report what feminism is and means, how many different answers do you think you'd get?

I've done quite a bit of reading and research into this lately (partly because I'm trying to figure out what I believe in this area), and it seems that every feminist has a different idea of what feminism is. Some even go so far to say that you are not a "real feminist" unless you do x,y, and z. Others say you are a feminist if you believe in the right to choose. Others claim that it's not about choice at all. Still others say you are a feminist if you believe in equal pay/equal rights/equal access to education/are against rape culture and victim blaming (regardless of gender).

Some people would say I'm a feminist because I fully believe in equal rights, equal pay, and access to education and all that. Others say I'm not because I choose to be a housewife, which automatically makes me reliant (in a monetary sense) on my husband.

In the end, I think I'll just say that I'm a thinking human that believes everyone has rights. I'll just stick with that.
12/26/2012
Bleu Bleu
Not a feminist. Sure I believe that EVERYONE should have equal rights, not just women. That goes for race, age, gender, religious belief, etc. I am not gonna just stick up for women when I am both a woman AND black. So I get paid less and face less equality no matter if I'm a man or not. Why fight for just ONE set of rights and not all?
12/26/2012
chernayavdova chernayavdova
To me, feminism is about having your own agency and making your own decisions. You can choose to be a housewife, to work, to have children or not, to be more "butch" or feminine - it's your decision. Feminism should be intersectional and take other backgrounds, orientations, religions, ethnicities, etc. into consideration. Just because you identify as a feminist doesn't mean that it's the only cause you support. I also don't think that just because there are varying definitions of feminism that it should be written off either. Any given group of people, no matter what their set of beliefs, will have differing viewpoints. People just are not that black and white.

Clearly, feminism - no matter how you define it - still necessary when there are men on women's health panels making legislation about their bodies and reproductive rights, where women still make less than men, and where slut-shaming and rape culture are still disgustingly prevalent in society.
12/26/2012
Bethy Cassatt Bethy Cassatt
I believe in female rights, but I understand that there are physical boundaries between men and women. I'm just tired of female minds being demeaned, they are exactly the same as men!

So, I want to be respected, but it's nice to hold the door for me. I'll hold it for you too, I understand that sometimes you're tired or lazy or just want a sign of human kindness.
12/26/2012
aluminummm aluminummm
I use the term "feminist" in mixed company but I don't actually identify as that. The feminist movement has traditionally erased the role of women of color in its own movement, has marginalized queer people, and has utterly abandoned trans* people. On top of that, mainstream feminism is largely led by and composed of white, cis, heterosexual, class-privileged, able-bodied women, and I am just not down with that scene. A lot of intersecting struggles get lost in the discussion when you're only talking about equal pay (especially when what everyone is -really- only talking about is white cis women). NOT. INTO. IT.
12/26/2012
Incendiaire Incendiaire
I consider myself to be an egalitarian because I believe in equality between the sexes, but I really dislike everything about "feminism."
12/26/2012
- Kira - - Kira -
I'm gonna jump in with those that dislike how feminism has transformed from equal rights to diminishing those that use these rights to choose to be a housewife or mother.

I'm also not fully sold on total equality between the sexes. We are different, no matter how much people may want to say otherwise. Sure, some women are super strong and can do more than most men, but there's also a large portion of women (myself included) who are just physically weaker. I can bitch up a storm saying I should be allowed to do manual labor, but in the end I'd just get hired to meet a quota for females on the job and probably end up injured or dead.

I try to live in reality. Reality dictates that people are not all equals. Some people are smarter than others, some stronger, some quicker, etc. Sometimes this is just a matter of person A versus person B, sometimes you can make a generalization (meaning "most" people fall into this, but not "all") by gender, age, occupation, etc. That's just how life is. Everyone is not a cookie cutter of the other, thus there will be differences.
12/26/2012
Supervixen Supervixen
Quote:
Originally posted by - Kira -
I'm gonna jump in with those that dislike how feminism has transformed from equal rights to diminishing those that use these rights to choose to be a housewife or mother.

I'm also not fully sold on total equality between the sexes. ...
I actually agree with you about the equality thing. Men and women are different in lots of ways, and just like most species, females tend to be smaller and physically weaker. Hell, we can't even throw like men can because we did not evolve that way, because we weren't out hunting game with spears and rocks. Ever watch men's baseball and women's baseball? There's a reason why women pitch underhand and men pitch overhand. Ever watch men's gymnastics and women's gymnastics? There are different types of exercises between the sexes for a reason. Women don't have the upper body strength to do the rings, the even bars or the pommel horse. We are just different.

And I'm okay with that. I don't expect equality where I'm clearly not cut out for the job--I weigh about 105 lbs. I'm not capable of doing certain jobs, and you know what? It's okay! Women should be valued for their feminine traits and roles (especially motherhood), not sidelined or pressured into acting like a man with tits and womb.

But beyond obvious physical inequalities, I think male and female behavior is also different--gender roles are not all nurture, no matter how much people want to claim they are. We have different hormones that influence our behavior, so when people want to claim that men and women are exactly the same barring physical traits, I find that absurd. Well how do you think we got these secondary sex traits? If I wanted to start taking loads of testosterone, my voice would deepen, I'd start spouting chest and facial hair, and I'd be able to build muscle mass where I wouldn't normally be able to. But it also does have an effect on behavior. Do you think I could pump myself full of testosterone and be totally the same? How about taking estrogen?

Gender differences should be embraced, respected and valued, I think. I don't believe that attempting to erase all differences between men and woman or denying that they exist is realistic or healthy. I'm not inferior for embracing my femininity--I'm just different from men, and being different is okay.
12/26/2012
- Kira - - Kira -
Quote:
Originally posted by Supervixen
I actually agree with you about the equality thing. Men and women are different in lots of ways, and just like most species, females tend to be smaller and physically weaker. Hell, we can't even throw like men can because we did not evolve that ...
I agree with all of that. I think no matter what the reason for a particular strength (be it gender, age, race, whatever), it should be celebrated.

I also embrace my femininity. It's not something I'm ashamed of because I can't bench 300 pounds or whatever. So what? There's plenty of things I can do that the majority of men can't.

Differences are what make people unique. It would be very boring if every person was the same. Who cares if the reason you're a certain way is because you're a woman or a man?
12/26/2012
SneakersAndPearls SneakersAndPearls
Quote:
Originally posted by - Kira -
I'm gonna jump in with those that dislike how feminism has transformed from equal rights to diminishing those that use these rights to choose to be a housewife or mother.

I'm also not fully sold on total equality between the sexes. ...
Very well put.

Further, I'd like to add that I am delighted with the polite discussion despite varying viewpoints.
12/26/2012
Chilipepper Chilipepper
I believe in Respect for All and Respect for Their Choices - self-identifying labels don't enter into it.
12/26/2012
Total posts: 70
Unique posters: 53