Do you think that your gender/race/sexuality/ etc. can affect your opinions when it comes to discrimination/prejudi ce/stereotypes/etc.?

Contributor: Nazaress Nazaress
I was browsing Tumblr when I came across a few paragraphs written by a cis-male and his opinion on "gamer girls". If you don't know, a "gamer girl" is different from a female gamer in that she believes girl gamers, including herself, are special and unique because they play video games and they often use this fact to try and gain the attention of easily-impressed males. The author said that these girls need to realize that they should just refer to themselves as "gamers", as opposed to "girl gamers", if they don't want to seem like an endangered species. The post was longer but I'll spare you.

I, as a cis-female, agreed with his opinion. These girls need to realize that women make up almost half of all gamers and we're not special snowflakes. We're just gamers! Someone else, though, presumably a female, did not. When a person responded to this girl, defending the original post, she wrote this:

"[NAME], I have one question. Are you a cis male?

If you are, then your opinion on sexism - just like [NAME]’s opinion - is invalid and unwanted. Goodbye."

I completely disagreed with this statement (though I said nothing because I don't want to get involved). I think a man can have an opinion on sexism, just as a woman can. This goes for white people having opinions on racism, just as black people can. Hopefully, the opinions are the same (which is equality for everyone), though this isn't always the case. I understand that a man can't entirely know what it's like to be prejudiced as a woman but does that automatically make his opinion wrong?

TL;DR: Can a man/white person/etc. have an opinion about sexism/racism/etc., even though they can't fully experience what it's like to be on the "other side"?
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
Yes, I believe they can
24  (83%)
No, I don't think they can
1  (3%)
It depends on if their opinion is positive or negative
I'm not sure
Other
4  (14%)
Total votes: 29
Poll is closed
01/16/2012
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Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Privilege. Evidently ALL white men and subsequently all white people in general have it, dontcha know?

And if he's ranting about what I think he's ranting about, he might just have a much better point than anyone wants to acknowledge. There are two porn stars that call themselves gamer girls and they want you to pay to watch them play xbox, topless, with you. Sadly, I had a great amount of respect for both of them (and even chatted with one a few times), but that's since gone out the window.

IDK, to be perfectly honest I'm really sick of all the bullshit and look forward to the day when I can say that I'm a woman and I know what I like and I know what I want and it's nobody else's fucking business.
01/16/2012
Contributor: Nazaress Nazaress
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
Privilege. Evidently ALL white men and subsequently all white people in general have it, dontcha know?

And if he's ranting about what I think he's ranting about, he might just have a much better point than anyone wants to acknowledge. ... more
You are exactly right about what he's ranting about. I agreed with him because of this, just as you would. I'm getting really tired of girls acting like special snowflakes because they "play video games". The majority of the ones who do this hardly even play, if at all, and if they do, it's things they think mostly only guys play, like Call of Duty and the like. It's solely for attention and I hate it. NO ONE is making them feel like they're special but themselves and guys who are stupid enough to fall for that kind of stuff. I have never personally been discriminated against for my gender when it comes to video games because I am a gamer and other gamers know it. End of story.

(I've heard of that porn thing you're talking about it and it makes me sick to my stomach. Women like that are giving female gamers and females in general a bad name. I hope we come to a time when everyone just SHUTS UP and lets everyone do what they want, work where they want, and like what they want without a single comment on their gender.)
01/16/2012
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by Nazaress
You are exactly right about what he's ranting about. I agreed with him because of this, just as you would. I'm getting really tired of girls acting like special snowflakes because they "play video games". The majority of the ones ... more
Exactly.

Alana Evans is an absolute sweetheart and I really did have a lot of respect for her, but this latest endeavor is the nail in the coffin. I couldn't believe it when I heard it, but that totally explains why she no longer has a show on Playboy Radio.
01/16/2012
Contributor: Nazaress Nazaress
I just realized my poll is kind of confusing if people don't read the "TL;DR". I hope they do because the poll is geared more towards that than the title of the thread.
01/16/2012
Contributor: Dusk Dusk
I think that everyone is entitled to an opinion on matters of discrimination and prejudice, but that the non-privileged group's opinion weighs more heavily because they are not the ones in power, and they are experiencing the discrimination firsthand.
01/16/2012
Contributor: quinceykay quinceykay
Yeah I think so. As a white person, for example, I can understand why my opinion about racism wouldn't be taken as seriously as a minority's, because I'm not part of the oppressed group. Straight cis males wouldn't have much of a say in the debate about sexism. Not that these groups are never oppressed, but when they are, it's more of an exception than a rule, and they just don't have the same experience.

Sorry, that was more general and less about the gamer girl thing, but I hope that makes sense anyway!
01/16/2012
Contributor: Missmarc Missmarc
I think it effects people more than people are willing to admit.
01/16/2012
Contributor: js250 js250
I think there might be a subconcious element in effect. Also, there are people who use their 'minority' status as an attention getter. I realize this is specifically geared towards "gamer girls" but----this is in all male dominated sports/activities.

I wish I could hide my avatar for a minute. Please do not peek at it while you read this.

I am an enduro, motocross and trail rider that rides a KX250 dirt bike. I restore vintage motorcycles for resale and do most of the work myself. I love hill climbing and semi-extreme trails.

Peek!! If you are good at and actually enjoy what you do, you do NOT need to add that you are a girl!! (Unless it is time to line up for your moto!)Could I have gotten more attention if I said I was a girl motocrosser, umm...yeah. But why - I earn my respect and place. Sorry, this is such a sore subject for me, so many girls that ride for their guy's attention also really exploit the whole women on dirt bike b.s.

And yeah, I tape those two girls down tight!!
01/16/2012
Contributor: Daemonin Daemonin
In response to the "gamer girl" vs. female gamers, I feel like a big promoter of the "special snowflake" mindset are the guys that harass girls once they realize they are female. It's a cycle, apparently. It has happened to me on many MMORPGs where I'll be casually talking to the guild and then they respond, "You're a GIRL?! Show me your tits!" then continue to treat me like I don't know what I'm doing because I'm a girl and I ultimately leave.

Luckily I'm in a guild now where there are many females so it's no big, but on occasion I do run into the ones that make us look dumb and desperate...

Prejudice... Heck, I'm sure everyone here is open-minded enough to know it goes both ways.
01/17/2012
Contributor: Chirple Chirple
Absolutely anyone can have an opinion on anything even if they're completely wrong or offensive.

Having not read the original post, I could see this going either way depending on a lot of factors.


However, I disagree about some things. Identity is personal. If someone feels like "girl gamer" or "gamer girl" or whatever is what they want to use, they shouldn't be shamed into assimilating into the label of "gamer".

I do feel asking people to assimilate is erasure and negative if it is unwanted. And if the person responding to the post felt like they were being erased, they have every right to have a negative opinion.

You find this is all sorts of groups. Black lesbians who find their issues overlooked in "Lesbian" groups, for example. While they ARE lesbians, they find that the group that uses that term so often excludes them, so they have fragmented off.*

*this is not true of all lesbian groups or all lesbians who are black, of course.


What minority wants to hear "This is what you're doing wrong, do it better" from the privileged majority ? While gaming isn't as serious an issue, it's like a well-off white person going to a poor black neighborhood and telling the people why they're such underachievers for not having good jobs and nice houses.

Even if you're partially right or on the right path, that's not the way to go about it, and it's going to make people pissed off at you. You're missing a critical part of the experience and even good intentions can feel like hostility and erasure.
01/17/2012
Contributor: Nazaress Nazaress
Wonderful responses, everyone! Thank you! Though I may not have my own responses in return, know that I did read what everyone read and took it into consideration. Thanks again!
01/17/2012
Contributor: Errant Venture Errant Venture
I don't think that, in and of themselves, your gender, race or sexuality affect your opinions, but rather it's your experiences of those things that affect your opinion, and how you react to these things. That these gamer girls are like this is not because they're girls, but because of their experiences which has led to this belief.
01/17/2012
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by Chirple
Absolutely anyone can have an opinion on anything even if they're completely wrong or offensive.

Having not read the original post, I could see this going either way depending on a lot of factors.


However, I disagree about some ... more
In this case "girl gamers" is much like, nay, exactly like straight college girls making out with other girls for attention. So, it's quite a bit different in that regard.
01/17/2012
Contributor: BBW Talks Toys BBW Talks Toys
I'm going to generalize here, then I'm going to get specific.

Regardless of what type of discrimination is being discussed, I feel that you never really truly understand what it feels like to be the target until you're a target, or are very close to someone who has been the target. What I mean is, I find that people who are less advocates for ending discrimination have rarely suffered discrimination or known anyone who has.

That said, I'm not a gamer, but am the wife of a gamer. He plays things like COD, Mass Effect, Bioshock, L4D, etc... When he's online, he just plays. He doesn't care with who (or what gender they are) so long as they pull their weight on his team.
01/17/2012
Contributor: K101 K101
No matter what, females are going to find a way to use anything like this as a way for attention. Sadly. I see females pretend to be bi sexual all the time only for male attention. Wha't so sad about this sort of behavior is that they would actually do things and pretend to be someone they are not just for male attention.. and not even good attention! Only disrespectful "oh you've kissed a girl! Well, yea, then maybe I'll have naughty fantasies about you." Who wants that kind of attention from random men?

For those of you who take your gaming seriously, I can see this being really onboxious. I'm not a gamer, I don't pretend to be one, but I won't hesitate to brag about my Mortal Kombat skills. I don't play every day and rarely do I play games these days, but talking about a game I do happen to enjoy is simply that. Talking about a game I enjoy. Why waste your time doing a hobby when you don't truly love it. Attention is NOT worth it. I'd much rather be called a grandma for loving to sew and craft because at least I'm doing what I love.

Now as far as not knowing how it feels until you've been in someone's shoes. True. Someone who's never been raped cannot tell me "you should get over it." if they've never been through it. Same goes for someone who's been abused or someone who's been ill. Same also goes for someone who claims they can tell you how more about your body than you when they don't have your body at all. Like a pap smear! A man can't truly understand because he hasn't been through it. OK. So yes, until you've been the target, played the game, done the deed, you cannot know what it is like.
01/23/2012
Contributor: K101 K101
Quote:
Originally posted by Daemonin
In response to the "gamer girl" vs. female gamers, I feel like a big promoter of the "special snowflake" mindset are the guys that harass girls once they realize they are female. It's a cycle, apparently. It has happened to me ... more
Wow! That is awful! That just pisses me off. I hate being treated that way! I shoot bee bee guns with our 12 year old and my partner and I often hear stupid comments over that too. Women can do anything just as well as men!
01/23/2012
Contributor: El-Jaro El-Jaro
I find that comment kinda funny. The "Are you a cis-male..." one.

I could be described as "cis-male". I don't care for it much, but not enough to argue a point on it. It's like I was assigned a label without the need or desire for one just so someone could say how I (personally, it seems sometimes) have oppressed someone.

I'm jr; jar to some. I do my thing and try not to put anyone down. I apologize when I've wronged. I've been educated when I was ignorant, much appreciated. As long as we all work together to promote equality and understand, I think we'll be all right.
01/23/2012