Feel like I just can't win

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Feel like I just can't win

SMichelle SMichelle
So, I'm at work, on my cellphone, sitting in the bathroom in tears on my break. I thought everything was going just fine, but then my coworker tells me my boss has been complaining about me not doing enough. I am doing everything while my boss is on her iPad all day.... And when I ask her if she's happy with my work and if I could do more, she says that everything is great. Now I hear that she's very unhappy with me from a coworker I trust. Seriously??? My break is almost up -- I just needed to vent a bit. Sorry for typos--am on my phone
08/20/2012
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Kindred Kindred
Quote:
Originally posted by SMichelle
So, I'm at work, on my cellphone, sitting in the bathroom in tears on my break. I thought everything was going just fine, but then my coworker tells me my boss has been complaining about me not doing enough. I am doing everything while my boss is ...
Sorry you're having a bad day. However, I would not rely on what a trusted coworker says. They may have innocently misunderstood. I would discuss your performance with your supervisor. Couch it by saying that you were previously told you were doing a good job and you wanted to ensure that was still the case. And if not, what suggestions they could offer to improve your performance. At the very least, it would demonstrate to them that you are interested in maintaining a satisfactory performance level.
08/20/2012
Petite Valentine Petite Valentine
Quote:
Originally posted by SMichelle
So, I'm at work, on my cellphone, sitting in the bathroom in tears on my break. I thought everything was going just fine, but then my coworker tells me my boss has been complaining about me not doing enough. I am doing everything while my boss is ...
I'm so sorry. Maybe your boss is having a bad day, or maybe there's a misunderstanding? There's no way to know unless she brings her issues to you, but we can't control what other people do. If you've already approached her for feedback, and you know you're doing your job to the best of your ability, then that's all you can do.

Hang in there!
08/20/2012
gypsymama gypsymama
Hang in there!!!! Things are rarely as bad as they seem!!!
08/20/2012
Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by Kindred
Sorry you're having a bad day. However, I would not rely on what a trusted coworker says. They may have innocently misunderstood. I would discuss your performance with your supervisor. Couch it by saying that you were previously told you were ...
I agree with Kindred here. I hope you cheer up soon.
08/20/2012
travelnurse travelnurse
Go by your gut and what your boss tells you. Over the years I have had coworkers who stir shit on purpose and they are usually talking out their ass. She got you all excited, didn't she? Go by what your boss tells you. Have a better day. You actually have quite a few supportive people on Eden that actually care.
08/20/2012
Sodom and Gomorrah Sodom and Gomorrah
Oh don't worry it seems just as what the others are saying. It might be a misunderstanding or coworker envy, who knows. Just relax because it wouldn't make any sense for the boss to tell your co-worker that. He or she could have told it directly to you in order to correct any problems.
08/20/2012
indiglo indiglo
Quote:
Originally posted by Kindred
Sorry you're having a bad day. However, I would not rely on what a trusted coworker says. They may have innocently misunderstood. I would discuss your performance with your supervisor. Couch it by saying that you were previously told you were ...
Took the words out of my mouth. Talk to your boss before assuming the information from the coworker is valid. People misunderstand things all the time, so it's best to talk directly to the person involved.
08/20/2012
Lioncub Lioncub
Hopefully your day gets better. I would talk to your boss or if your Human Resources Dept has an open door policy go talk to them. I try not to get worked up over what others say, no matter how much I value their trust. It can be too easy to take things out of context.
08/20/2012
js250 js250
When I had 6 employees working for me--I noticed a bit of misaligned, word-of-mouth comments. I would ask one of them to cut material and she interpreted it as the other person--who was working on a different projects I assigned---was not doing her job, etc. I finally had to sit them down and tell them I was tired of dealing with their office politics--either accept the assigned jobs or find a different job. There was no assigned areas of the job since it was all customized, tailored to the client that was ordering their particular items....

Tell your boss you have hears rumors about her being unsatisfied with your work and ask what can be done to bring it up to her standards.And make sure you leave the stress at work today---that is where it belongs, you need time for yourself as well, okay?? Huge hugs!!!!!
08/20/2012
SMichelle SMichelle
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
When I had 6 employees working for me--I noticed a bit of misaligned, word-of-mouth comments. I would ask one of them to cut material and she interpreted it as the other person--who was working on a different projects I assigned---was not doing her ...
I spent the rest of the day really working my ass off... to the point that I was literally exhausted. During the last three hours, I did not sit down once at all, or stop working. That's not a long time, really, but I was seriously working my ass off doing everything I could think -- including things that aren't in my job description.

At the end of the day, I turned to my boss and asked if there was anything more I could be doing. She got very quiet... This is how my boss is -- she doesn't like confrontation and will NEVER tell the person that she has a problem about it until she's at her breaking point. For instance, she used to complain to me about my co-worker never being willing to stay late, but she never mentioned it to my co-worker. She used to complain to me about another co-worker wasting supplies, and leaving a mess, but she never told the co-worker -- until the day she decided to let that co-worker go. So, I'm fairly certain that she did complain to my co-worker about me, because that is her style.

I finally broke down completely -- eyes filling with tears and all, and said to her, "you need to talk to me honestly, please. I can't do things if I don't know that I'm supposed to be doing them... I'm doing what I think I need to be doing. Can you please just tell me if I can do more?" ... she came over, gave me a hug, said she's "usually" very happy, but that she needs to me "help her more" -- again she didn't say what, even when I asked her what more she would like me to do, because I will gladly do it if I know what she wants.

But it just pisses me off... my boss is one of the laziest people I have ever met. I clean the entire center one day, and the next I'll come in and she'll have it trashed! Half of the day she spends playing words with friends on her iPad. And when she sees me working my ass off, she'll tell me "relax a little -- sit down and kick back." -- but now I don't help her enough?? She just can't seem to make up her mind.

The same is true with vacation time. She almost fired me a few months back because I had asked about vacation time. Then, when I was in the UK visiting my boyfriend -- I posted on facebook that I was very sad to leave, and she sent me an e-mail saying that I could have a vacation whenever I want, for as long as I want, as long as I let her know a few months in advance. And whenever she sees my boyfriend and I joking about our future vacation plans on facebook, she'll comment for me to just let her know when I want to go. But... then she acts like me asking for even a day off to go to the doctors is the worst thing in the world. Yet she calls in someone to cover for her three days a week so she can go to the gym.... ugh.

I told her today that I literally feel sick to my stomach every time I need to ask for a day off. I've been wanting to go see my boyfriend again in January, but I am absolutely terrified to ask for the time off.


/end rant
08/20/2012
Kindred Kindred
Quote:
Originally posted by SMichelle
I spent the rest of the day really working my ass off... to the point that I was literally exhausted. During the last three hours, I did not sit down once at all, or stop working. That's not a long time, really, but I was seriously working my ass ...
I'm hesitant to suggest this with the condition the economy is currently in, but have you considered that it may not be worth working for this person anymore? It seems that there are issues that go beyond today's incident. Maybe take a good hard look at if you have other options at least?
08/20/2012
kitty1949 kitty1949
I'm sorry people suck, honey. We're all here for you. It'll get better.
08/20/2012
Petite Valentine Petite Valentine
Quote:
Originally posted by SMichelle
I spent the rest of the day really working my ass off... to the point that I was literally exhausted. During the last three hours, I did not sit down once at all, or stop working. That's not a long time, really, but I was seriously working my ass ...
She sounds like an absolute joy to work for…

I wish you luck, but if she's the type of boss to talk behind an employee's back, instead of addressing the problem with him or her, she's not a good person to work for. She can give you all the hugs and encouragement in the world, and promise you days off when you need them, but the next time she needs a scapegoat, guess who has a bull's-eye painted on her back?

My suggestion is that you continue doing the job to the best of your ability, but don't get emotionally attached to her approval of your performance.
08/20/2012
SMichelle SMichelle
Quote:
Originally posted by Kindred
I'm hesitant to suggest this with the condition the economy is currently in, but have you considered that it may not be worth working for this person anymore? It seems that there are issues that go beyond today's incident. Maybe take a good ...
I've definitely considered it, and I think I am going to start putting in for other jobs. It's unlikely that I could find one that pays as much as this one in such close proximity.

When she's good -- she's great, but she just has no clue how to manage a business.
08/20/2012
hawaiian chick hawaiian chick
Quote:
Originally posted by Kindred
Sorry you're having a bad day. However, I would not rely on what a trusted coworker says. They may have innocently misunderstood. I would discuss your performance with your supervisor. Couch it by saying that you were previously told you were ...
I have to agree with this. I wouldn't even stress the small stuff things could always be worse. Plus if you know your doing what you should be and your happy with your work then that is all that matters.
08/20/2012
PeaceToTheMiddleEast PeaceToTheMiddleEast
Quote:
Originally posted by Kindred
Sorry you're having a bad day. However, I would not rely on what a trusted coworker says. They may have innocently misunderstood. I would discuss your performance with your supervisor. Couch it by saying that you were previously told you were ...
I agree. Sorry this is happening to you. I hope you feel better.
08/20/2012
FallFire FallFire
I totally agree with what everyone else has said. If I were you, I'd just do the best I could and if it's not meant to work out, then that only means there are better things waiting for you. Give your boss and coworker the benefit of the doubt; it could be a wide range of things (envy, miscommunication, someone having a bad day). Just be the very best you can be. Don't let others stress you out- life is too short! **Hugs** Hope you have a better day tomorrow.
08/20/2012
Total posts: 18
Unique posters: 14