Hilariouly Terrible Things to say in Bed!

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Hilariouly Terrible Things to say in Bed!

Eden C. Eden C.
I had a friend who was fooling around with his girlfriend while I was in the car with them. She started touching him through his clothes, and he said, "Aaaaand Houston, we have liftoff!"

Other ideas include "Fire in the hole!" and, of course, "...Aaaand boom goes the dynamite!"
03/02/2011
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Solar Ray Solar Ray
There's always the classic... "Is it in yet?". Sure to boost the ego of any guy.
03/03/2011
Fannybutts Fannybutts
The Bloggess had an article with a bunch of tweets that was all this.

My favorite from there is "Hi I'm Chris Hansen."
03/03/2011
Shellz31 Shellz31
Quote:
Originally posted by Solar Ray
There's always the classic... "Is it in yet?". Sure to boost the ego of any guy.
Lol
Feel sorry for the poor guys who have to hear that.
03/03/2011
Lady Venus Lady Venus
"You say it's going to be a PENIS when it grows up?"
03/03/2011
sexyintexas sexyintexas
Quote:
Originally posted by Eden C.
I had a friend who was fooling around with his girlfriend while I was in the car with them. She started touching him through his clothes, and he said, "Aaaaand Houston, we have liftoff!"

Other ideas include "Fire in the ...
Giggeling is always a no-no too....haha.
03/03/2011
Pleasure Piratess Pleasure Piratess
Quote:
Originally posted by Lady Venus
"You say it's going to be a PENIS when it grows up?"
LOL!
03/03/2011
littlezimmey littlezimmey
First time I had sex, the guy put it in a said "you know we're having sex now right?"

REALLY???
03/05/2011
Vaccinium Vaccinium
"So, is your sister up for a three-way?"
03/05/2011
IndependentlyHappy IndependentlyHappy
Yeah, giggling is pretty bad. Another classic is, "Um...mind if I take a look down there to make sure I'm putting it in the right place?"
03/06/2011
Illusional Illusional
Quote:
Originally posted by Lady Venus
"You say it's going to be a PENIS when it grows up?"
LOL
03/06/2011
Eden C. Eden C.
Quote:
Originally posted by Lady Venus
"You say it's going to be a PENIS when it grows up?"
No. One day, it will hatch from its cocoon and become a beautiful butterfly!
03/06/2011
Beaners Beaners
An ex of mine one time said "Free candy!" right as he slipped in. We were joking about it, and it was kind of an accident, but it was the one time that a mood has ever been totally killed for me. I don't think we had sex for days.
03/06/2011
dv8 dv8
Smells like fish, tastes like... fish.
03/06/2011
Drakoni Drakoni
"Volcano!"
"Pop goes the weasel!"
"Fizz-fizz!"
"Gosh, that was a gusher."
10/18/2011
sktb0007 sktb0007
Quote:
Originally posted by Solar Ray
There's always the classic... "Is it in yet?". Sure to boost the ego of any guy.
this was the exact thing i thought as soon as I had seen the title of this thread lol
10/18/2011
sktb0007 sktb0007
Quote:
Originally posted by Fannybutts
The Bloggess had an article with a bunch of tweets that was all this.

My favorite from there is "Hi I'm Chris Hansen."
I read that the other day. It's flippin' hilarious!!!!
10/18/2011
DiscretionAdvised DiscretionAdvised
"That reminds me, I need to take Grandma to the gynecologist".

Mentioning anything about relatives is an awful idea.
10/18/2011
AndroAngel AndroAngel
"For God, Glory, and My Country!" And/or "Manifest Destiny!"

I'm half-Native American. My lover jokes around quite a bit about it. We're both cool with it, he's also mixed race, so we go back and forth with the bad jokes.
10/18/2011
zwee75 zwee75
"Where is it?"
10/18/2011
Total posts: 20
Unique posters: 18