Holding any hidden grudges?

*Ashley* *Ashley*
I was looking into old school friends from high school. I didn't think I had any grudges but apparently I do. I saw someone I didn't get along with in school and I felt knots in my stomach. Then to learn that person is doing awesome in life made me disappointed. Especially believing they are the same they where back in school.
I'm interested in others perspectives.
Ever look back and wish your old enemies where worse off than you?
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
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Total votes: 26 (9 voters)
Poll is open
Apr 15, 8:08 pm
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RomanticGoth RomanticGoth
I don't care about old classmates. They weren't exactly friendly to me then, why should they be now? I'm more interested in those I love that are around me now.
Apr 16, 3:50 am
RonLee RonLee
High school was NOT a happy time for me. As far as HS reunions, LOL no! I have absolutely no interest in attending a HS reunion, ever. HS is in the past and other than commenting on a post such as this one, I have no interest in even thinking about it.
Apr 19, 12:44 pm
wrecklesswords wrecklesswords
I will admit that when I am experiencing times of self-doubt, I will facebook stalk those on my friend's list and some of them I feel a sense of jealousy when they seem to be doing better than I am. I will look into their pictures and all of their friends. I feel jealous that they seem to have kept most of the same friends from high school when I only have a few.

THEN!

I snap myself out of it and realize that only their success and happiness is posted, not any drama, sadness, or tragedy they have or are experiencing. I realize that they are just as human as I am and it doesn't do me any good to sit there and make them out to be so much better than me when in the end, we are all the same.
Apr 19, 2:38 pm
Castielskitten Castielskitten
I have said hi to some, and we talked a little but that's about it. They are now mainly busy taking care of their families and all that, so we never even talk and I barely give two seconds thought about how they are.

The only one I actually keep up with is a girl who bullied me when I was trying to help her (because she was being bullied). I'm actually her aunt now.
Apr 20, 4:30 am
Wicked Wahine Wicked Wahine
None of my grudges are hidden, lol! Actually, I don't really have grudges, so much as a "total lack of interest and caring for those I have dismissed as not worthwhile" --that would be more like it. If I happen to hear someone I didn't like is doing well, however, I do think it's a shame they aren't as miserable as they have made others over the years. But I really think they get their just deserts at some point, in some way, so I don't dwell on it beyond a passing thought. I think, "Gee, that's just too bad; the jerk deserves worse." And then I go on with my day.

I don't think people's basic personalities change all that much (barring mental or serious physical illness). But I was/am a good judge of character and if I pegged someone as really terrible, then there was overwhelming evidence of it, not just regular school drama. I think those who want to re-write the past because they are embarrassed about their behavior, tend to be the ones who embrace this "people change" mantra. Sure, some people change, but I think it's usually after heavy shit, like experiencing terrible violence or war, significant illness, death, extreme hardship, or abuse, drug dependency and recovery...that kind of stuff (for example, but by no means all inclusive).

I basically would have to see this metamorphosis to believe it. I just haven't seen ANY evidence of anyone I know having changed their core personality. Sure, if they think it behooves them now, they might be nice to the person they used to bully, but I don't think the nature that caused them to be hateful is gone. I think it's there and manifests itself in other ways.

Yeah, I'm not a trusting person, go figure; I was harassed all through school, despite doing nothing to cause it. I had lots of false rumors and passive aggressive anger directed at me in high school for no reason that I could tell (it turns out jealousy makes people mean and tell lies about those they envy or feel threatened by, who knew? /sarcasm) At least I can truthfully say that I have never been mean to anybody and I was nice to everyone in school, despite any grief that might have brought me. I have always treated people as I would like to be treated and my actions are all I can worry about or control. So, those others? They could "fall off a cliff for all I care"

I realize my attitude might surprise some people, but there you have it.

@*Ashley*, this was a great question/poll topic!
Apr 30, 3:00 am
Total posts: 6
Unique posters: 6