How would you have reacted?

SMichelle SMichelle
So, tonight I was buying tickets for a local event. The woman at the counter smiled and said, "ah, one adult with one on the way, right?"

I looked all around, but I was the only one standing there.
"Huh?" I finally said.

"Congrats, honey. I remember how excited I was when I had my son..." She took my money, and handed me my ticket to the concert.

"Huh?" I said again, tilting my head to the side, a baffled look on my face... "What?"

She ignored me. I stood there, dumbfounded, for a few seconds, and then went into the bathroom, where I quickly sat down and cried for about 15 minutes. After that, I stood, looking at myself in the mirror, trying to figure out why she would have assumed I was pregnant.

I am NOT pregnant. I have gained about 5 pounds in the last few months, however I never felt like I looked fat until just now. I can only assume that perhaps it was the dress I had on that made me look this way (the dress flows outward, over my curves), but I wear this dress often and I have never received comments like this before. Honestly, I still just want to cry about this comment.

WHY in the world would anyone say something like this to someone? It just seems inconsiderate to say something like this unless you KNOW for sure.

Anyway, I had no clue how to react.

How would you have reacted?
05/16/2013
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spiced spiced
I think anyone would have felt awful. I'm sure I would have.

That SUCKS, for her to have said that. Just INCREDIBLY tactless and idiotic. In your position, I think I would have reacted pretty much the same as you did. I sure wouldn't have known what to say. Even after thinking about it for several minutes, I can't think of an appropriate response to something so clueless.
05/16/2013
js250 js250
I would have done the same thing as you....wondered what the hell she was talking about then bawled when I realized what it was!!! I wish this had not happened to you--I have seen your lingerie reviews and pictures, so do not think it is all you!!! You do not look pregnant to me, no way, no how! Take her words with a grain of salt. I have had women ask me how much milk I produce--based on my boobs....I am 43--there better not be any milk in there or I have a pituitary tumor that needs removed!!!

You know, there are many people we encounter in our lives--and most are insignificant to our actual life. Treat her as an insignificant person you would just rather forget. Remember how talented of a writer, wife, and person you are--well above getting upset by those type of remarks!! Hugs--
05/16/2013
js250 js250
Quote:
Originally posted by spiced
I think anyone would have felt awful. I'm sure I would have.

That SUCKS, for her to have said that. Just INCREDIBLY tactless and idiotic. In your position, I think I would have reacted pretty much the same as you did. I sure wouldn't ... More
I am such a smart ass I would have said yes--my husband is on his way.....
05/16/2013
KrissyNovacaine KrissyNovacaine
I probably would have made one or more smart assed remarks about her expecting some brain cells.
05/16/2013
GonetoLovehoney GonetoLovehoney
I would have told her to fuck off and "No, I'm not pregnant *is fixed* you're just stupid.
05/16/2013
Hummingbird Hummingbird
First off it isn't any of that woman's business if you are or not.
Secondly, she is in a customer service position, sales at that, just her mentioning that goes to show how truly unaware she is of the people she meets and how to speak with them in a polite and courteous manner. (I use the word unaware, but I mean so much worse)
Thirdly, I would never even say something to that to someone I know who I think might be, it is up to the individual to divulge that personal information, if they even want to.
You have every right to be upset with her and to cry, I would to.

I see js250 mentioning all the achievements in your life, that is what truly counts, who you are as an individual.

I agree with js250: Treat her as an insignificant person you would just rather forget.
05/16/2013
Zombirella Zombirella
Some people are rude. I would NEVER say anything unless the person was CLEARLY showing and in maternity clothes. I do believe that you can usually tell if someone is pregnant, larger, very overweight people, it hard to tell so I just wouldn't even go there. I'm as big as I've ever been, I have some chub on me. 5yrs ago I was working at a pharmacy and my back was killing me so I was standing there holding my back, I had on a baggy scrub top. I had a lady ask me if I've been having back pain much in my pregnancy. I thought "are you effing serious?!" I just straight looked at her and said, "I'm NOT pregnant, I'm fat and my back hurts" and she was speechless. I don't even think I was really that out of shape then to even call myself fat. I've heard it from other people too, small girls with a tiny gut on them but they clearly weren't pregnant. They didn't have that SOLID baby belly. Just ignore it. I know it's hard. I'd be offended but I'd handled it like I did- shock factor.
I think ANY woman should know better than to say that to someone unless it was clearly obvious. But, there are always ignorant people.
Like it was said above, it's not their business anyways. I've heard pregnant people get bitchy with a stranger that asked them questions. Personally, when I do become pregnant, I have no problem with someone asking me questions and don't really get why people do get upset when they are and someone asks how far or boy/girl?
05/16/2013
ViVix ViVix
Quote:
Originally posted by SMichelle
So, tonight I was buying tickets for a local event. The woman at the counter smiled and said, "ah, one adult with one on the way, right?"

I looked all around, but I was the only one standing there.
"Huh?" I finally ... More
Death stare. Unless someone tells me that she is pregnant, I don't find that it is my business to speculate on such things. We all carry our weight differently (especially during an actual pregnancy). I had some friends who gained 20 lbs, and some who gained 80 (no I'm not exaggerating) lbs. Some of my friends are size 0 and some are size 18. For these reasons, I never speculate that someone is pregnant until I'm told. However, I would have felt awful as well. I'd probably write to the company though later when my p*ssed off feelings kicked in.
05/16/2013
mpfm mpfm
Oh my gosh, I am so sorry. People just have no common sense sometimes. I would have reacted just like you.
05/16/2013
Ansley Ansley
I probably would have reacted the same way. Though while I was waiting for the screen to load so I can post I thought to myself "I bet she was glowing and that's why she said that". You were probably just particularly beautiful in an expectant mother kind of way and she took it upon herself to poke her nose where it doesn't belong.

Please don't let those two seconds of a stranger's momentary lapse of reason affect the rest of your life. Five pounds is a sneeze comparatively and there's no reason for you to carry this with you.

I weigh less than 100 lbs and I've had people ask if I was pregnant...
05/16/2013
stacylyn stacylyn
Quote:
Originally posted by spiced
I think anyone would have felt awful. I'm sure I would have.

That SUCKS, for her to have said that. Just INCREDIBLY tactless and idiotic. In your position, I think I would have reacted pretty much the same as you did. I sure wouldn't ... More
I agree
05/16/2013
wicked48 wicked48
A smart remark back at her would have been my reaction!
05/16/2013
KinkyKatieJames KinkyKatieJames
My reaction would have been the same as yours. After crying, I would have just been plain mad though.

Try not to take it to heart though. The dress probably had something to do with it. If it's how I am imagining it, then the style isn't always flattering. I have dresses like that. which my boyfriend and I refer to as my "baby dresses" since they make me look pregnant.

Either way, the woman has no tact and I'm sorry you went through that.
05/16/2013
Mr. John Mr. John
Quote:
Originally posted by SMichelle
So, tonight I was buying tickets for a local event. The woman at the counter smiled and said, "ah, one adult with one on the way, right?"

I looked all around, but I was the only one standing there.
"Huh?" I finally ... More
I would suggest you consider that the person you were talking to has taken a job in a small booth, sitting behind a sheet of glass.
05/16/2013
snowminx snowminx
I would have felt the same way you did, then maybe ask for a manager and tell them what happened. She was way out of line to do that and even if you were pregnant she's not even close enough to where she should feel comfortable in case that person isn't actually pregnant. Unless you know them you shouldn't just assume that they are pregnant right after looking at them. Don't worry about it too much, maybe your clothes might have been a little tight?
05/16/2013
butts butts
WOW. Now I'm not a woman, so that comment towards me would have just been absolutely silly, but what an awful rude thing to assume and SAY OUT LOUD! There's a few things you should never assume, and that's definitely one of them (along with people's orientation, gender/sex, preferences, etc.)
Never assume someone is pregnant unless they tell you, some people carry weight differently. Like your story proves, it's pretty damn upsetting to the person receiving the unnecessary comment, especially from someone working customer service, she should be written up for behavior like that.
05/17/2013
Alan & Michele Alan & Michele
Over these past months I've been stuck in a sassy biatch mode, so she'd have gotten an equally rude reply. Prolly something along the lines of "No I'm not pregnant, I just ate your husband, and damn was he good!"

~M
05/17/2013
GONE! GONE!
That's so mean! People shouldn't say that unless it's really painfully obvious. I would've probably been sarcastic back but, wow.
05/17/2013
Pete's Princess Pete's Princess
Unfortunately common sense is not common. My Hunny gets so frustrated with people like this, he will sometimes try to educate them. I have to stop him and remind him that only God can fix stupid. Say a little prayer to your higher power that this woman will gain some wisdom and manners so that she doesn't rain on anyone else's parade.

By the way, I have also seen your lingerie reviews and you look great.
05/22/2013
LavenderSkies LavenderSkies
Wow, I'm very sorry about this! How rude and it is clearly none of her business whether you are or aren't. I disagree with some replies above mine, I would not be rude back, as I don't believe in an eye for an eye. I would have politely corrected her. But I would have cried just as you have. *Hugs*
05/22/2013
Mr. John Mr. John
It really is heart warming to read so many supportive messages.
05/22/2013
Total posts: 22
Unique posters: 20