You're Invited!!! But, You Gotta Pay to Get In...

Contributor: Eva Schwaltz Eva Schwaltz
Forget it! I had friends who used to do this, and even for bachlerette parties, and gave the guests nothing in return. Incredibly rude, and a good way to lose friends.
09/25/2011
Contributor: Menarae Menarae
Pfft, I wouldn't go. If it was a charity donation (especially in lieu of a gift) then yes. Especially considering I'd probably wind up spending more than $25 on a gift.

I threw a couple of Halloween parties, and I never asked people to pitch in. Not even for the food, and I could easily spend over $100 just on the food. All I'd say is I wasn't providing alcohol, and if people wanted to booze it up, they'd have to bring their own. But I always provided plenty of food and non-alcoholic drinks.
09/25/2011
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by domsub1993
No, I wouldn't do that. And I wouldn't go to a birthday party where I had to pay. Are you expected to bring a gift??
I don't think so, on the gift part. We weren't invited, anyway. Which is probably extremely fortunate for this person because they would have received an ear full and a half from us. But, we're also a lot older than their target audience in the first place.
09/25/2011
Contributor: Sir Sir
I agree that that is incredibly distasteful. Not the most attractive thing, and I would not attend such a party. Parties are supposed to be fun, not make you burn a hole in your wallet.
09/25/2011
Contributor: SexyTabby SexyTabby
That's so weird. No, I wouldn't pay to go to a friends birthday party. That is really tacky. I don't know anyone who would do that. Sure they may ask to help with bringing a dish or something but not outright charge to be there.
09/25/2011
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
I'd go with no on that. If I were to host a party with something like a keg involved, I might ask people who wanted to drink from the keg to help chip in to cover the cost, but I don't think that's all that tacky. $25 for a bag of goodies I may not like? I'd rather stay home.
09/26/2011
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
Quote:
Originally posted by Redboxbaby
I would give my regrets and give a polite, but honest reason why I wasn't going, "Sorry, but things are tight. I can't possibly pay that much to attend a party

Funny you say this!

My husband came home with Christmas Party ... more
That's ridiculous! My husband's work used to give parties several times a year, some for entire families, some just for couples. Now, they do nothing. But, I think you're right that they are making it expensive so only people who have will be able to attend.

I hate parties one is "expected" to attend. Not to mention to have to pay that kind of money right at Christmas, too, to spend time with a bunch of stuffed shirts.

When is the Class War starting? I'm loading up.

Yeah, Owl. I'm "Sassy." I usually like to make sure my point isn't lost, especially on people, like the person who is throwing this party, who really need the reality check.
09/26/2011
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by Jul!a
I'd go with no on that. If I were to host a party with something like a keg involved, I might ask people who wanted to drink from the keg to help chip in to cover the cost, but I don't think that's all that tacky. $25 for a bag of ... more
Lord knows I don't need my arm twisted to stay home. We went out yesterday afternoon and had a pretty pleasant experience, but I was overwhelmed by the time we got home. Sixteen screens showing at least nine different games at once and not knowing who was cheering for what play/team all made my brain go "argh...I don't understand!" But in the end, we got to meet some pretty awesome people.
09/26/2011
Contributor: Nora Nora
I wouldn't attend and I wouldn't be nice about telling them why! "Nice" is for those who deserve it...not a moron trying to make money by throwing a party, period!

In fact, I am trying to put together a party right now for mid-October (a House Party, a few new board games and such). I would NEVER ask anyone for money! But, then again, due to diet concerns in my house, I also tell everyone to bring snacks they want to share. I do provide some snacks too.

Asking for money this way is even more tacky than a "money purse" at a wedding! I had a friend who did a "money tree" at her wedding...upon arriving, you were expected to tie a twenty onto the fake tree! I walked past it pretending I didn't see it...taking the time off work, letting her stay at my house the night before, driving her all over to get her hair done, pick up the dress, pay for the bridesmaid dress, (wear the thing), and put up with the people there I couldn't stand were enough in my opinion...I also gave them a gift. I didn't feel the need to also help their bank account while I was there.

As for the "gift" bag...it's more of a "free gift with purchase" type thing...
09/26/2011
Contributor: KrazyKandy KrazyKandy
I wouldnt pay to be included, I am way to cheap.
09/26/2011
Contributor: Owl Identified Owl Identified
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
That's ridiculous! My husband's work used to give parties several times a year, some for entire families, some just for couples. Now, they do nothing. But, I think you're right that they are making it expensive so only people who have ... more
Trust me, your sass IS appreciated. If there's one person that does not need an apology or explanation for sass, it's me.

This is a picture of us sassing the party thrower:

09/26/2011
Contributor: GenderSexplorations GenderSexplorations
There's one word that stands out out of all of the other comments on this: Tacky. That's just what it is. Asking someone to bring snacks is one thing. Asking someone to pay for their own goodie bag? That's something entirely different. If you're not willing to cover the cost of the goodie bags, don't have them! But don't charge guests for your own party!
09/26/2011
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
Lord knows I don't need my arm twisted to stay home. We went out yesterday afternoon and had a pretty pleasant experience, but I was overwhelmed by the time we got home. Sixteen screens showing at least nine different games at once and not ... more
I make a point to avoid places like that unless I absolutely have to be there lol. It's awesome you got to meet some pretty awesome people tho!
09/26/2011
Contributor: Beaners Beaners
Kla$$y. That's all I have to say.
09/27/2011
Contributor: dude dude
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
An aquaintance is throwing their own birthday party and giving everyone gift bags. These gift bags are filled with mini-liquor bottles, shot glasses, condoms, and other things that are "hush-hush". Knowing them, it's probably anal beads ... more
I have never heard of anything like this. It sounds very interesting and a clever idea. With the economy being the way its been I can understand the logic. I am sort of curious, is this like a key party?
09/27/2011
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by dude
I have never heard of anything like this. It sounds very interesting and a clever idea. With the economy being the way its been I can understand the logic. I am sort of curious, is this like a key party?
No, it's just this person taking advantage or hoping they're cool enough that people would want to pay to attend their party. I know they have the money to throw the party outright, but instead of asking people to just bring a bottle of their favorite liquor or whatever to help with the costs, they decided to do this instead.
09/27/2011
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by Jul!a
I make a point to avoid places like that unless I absolutely have to be there lol. It's awesome you got to meet some pretty awesome people tho!
It wasn't a big deal, just a sports bar. But, I forget how big football is here sometimes and that was the overwhelming part. I felt like the only person in the bar who didn't know what the hell was going on. LOL
09/27/2011
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
Quote:
Originally posted by Owl Identified
Trust me, your sass IS appreciated. If there's one person that does not need an apology or explanation for sass, it's me.

This is a picture of us sassing the party thrower:

Thank you.
09/27/2011
Contributor: js250 js250
Wow! That is some of the most low class behavior I have heard of so far! I would send her a copy of a check made out to the local foodbank and tell her you made the donation in her name as a birthday present. Then let them know you will be MIA for the event due to a casual get together with friends and family and charging people for the privelege of spending her birthday with her was tacky, tasteless and cheap. I guess it depends on how well you know these people and if you want to continue their friendship, but that is what I would do.
09/27/2011
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
Wow! That is some of the most low class behavior I have heard of so far! I would send her a copy of a check made out to the local foodbank and tell her you made the donation in her name as a birthday present. Then let them know you will be MIA for ... more
That's too much like work, lol. It was just kind of in one ear and out the other, but I eventually became curious enough to see if anyone else had done this in the past.
09/27/2011
Contributor: socalsusieq socalsusieq
that is just plain tacky!!!
09/27/2011
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
It wasn't a big deal, just a sports bar. But, I forget how big football is here sometimes and that was the overwhelming part. I felt like the only person in the bar who didn't know what the hell was going on. LOL
Which is precisely why I try to avoid sports bars lol
09/27/2011
Contributor: El-Jaro El-Jaro
Def. a "Thanks, but no thanks" thing.

Unless the price of admission covers something like a keg or something, it's a turn off to me.
09/27/2011
Contributor: Shellz31 Shellz31
I wouldn't do it and I also wouldn't attend one.
I'd prefer to spend $25 on things I KNOW I want and will like. Things like condoms are useless to me, so I'd be paying for some things that are a waste.
09/27/2011
Contributor: Jobthingy Jobthingy
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
A party is an event that the host or hostess gives to celebrate his or her guests. I am not big on people giving their own birthday or anniversary parties anyway. They always say "Oh, don't bring a gift." but people who don't always ... more
THIS. Tacky was the first word that came to my mind while reading this post.

Maybe, if all the money was going to charity, I would think about it. But I probably still wouldnt go just on the principle that they are asking me to pay to attend their birthday.
09/27/2011
Contributor: Illusional Illusional
Quote:
Originally posted by indiglo
So tacky. I've known people that have done this too, and I never go. If they ask, I'll even tell them why I'm not going. I would never do it. If you can't afford to throw a party, then don't throw a party - just have all your ... more
Agreed!
09/28/2011
Contributor: Illusional Illusional
Quote:
Originally posted by El-Jaro
Def. a "Thanks, but no thanks" thing.

Unless the price of admission covers something like a keg or something, it's a turn off to me.
I know, right?
My own personal couple bottles of vodka, or something.

Just for some goodie bag, I don't think so.
09/28/2011
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
This reminds me of a family in our neighborhood. They were going to buy one of those large wooden playsets, but they told everyone that the kids who wanted to come and play on it would have to pay for the privilege of playing with their kids, "maybe $2.00 a visit" on the playset "because those are expensive."

This is a family of kids who came into our yard every single day, swam in our pool (where I then had to be lifeguard even if I was busy elsewhere) played on the large wooden playset My Man had built from scratch, ran through my garden etc. I did bring it up with the mother, that our yard was a lot of fun, pool, playset, play house, toys, room to run (we live on an acre of land) etc, but it had never occurred to my husband and I to charge people to play with our kids in our yard. Our yard was always open and inviting to the neighborhood children. I also made it clear my kids would not be allowed to play at her home if there was a charge.

They never built that play set. The things some people think of. Absolutely mercenary.
09/28/2011
Contributor: Liz2 Liz2
I would not be interested; and the goody bag gimmick, no thanks, I will happily buy my own goodies and condoms.
I think she is trying to be edgy or something....but doesn't make it with me.
09/28/2011