Is anyone here a victim of rape or other violence?

Contributor: ToyGurl ToyGurl
This is not a public poll, all answers are private. This also doesn't require explanations. I was a victim of rape in high school and I guess I've been thinking about it lately and it just hurts all over again. I'm wondering who else has been through this.
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
I am/was a victim of physical abuse
16
I am/ was a victim of domestic violence (spouse, partner, boyfriend, girlfriend, etc.)
16
I am/ was a victim of emotional/mental abuse
27
I have been a victim of sexual rape
20
I have been a victim of sexual molestation
25
Other
6
Total votes: 110 (51 voters)
Poll is closed
09/11/2011
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Contributor: Ansley Ansley
I've experienced a buttload of pain in my early childhood and througout adolescence. I think I was fourteen when I decided I was going to start calling the shots and I turned into this sort of femme fatale, vixen-esque creature that began to manipulate men into doing my bidding. It worked quite well on a number of them.

A couple of years later, I met my match. The guy who with one look could quiet me down, make me shut my mouth and not be pissed off about it, the guy who quieted all of the vindictive thoughts I had of revenge. I whole-heartedly believed this man saved my life. He was the first person who ever invested time and effort into me as a person, instead of seeing my free-spirited potential sprawled across dingy sheets.

I stopped being manipulative and just started being me. I was given the freedom to explore myself, life and everything it had to offer within this incredible safety net of his arms. It's amazing and I'll never be able to thank him enough.

And this is why I think of myself as a survivor, never a victim. It shaped who I am today and while it is not a pleasant experience, it is a reality and one that many, many people will experience in their lifetime. I've gone down some incredibly dark mental roads trying to justify the actions of these people and I think that too has helped me understand it all just a little bit better in the end. I am stronger in spite of it. I will not let my past dictate my future.
09/11/2011
Contributor: wrecklesswords wrecklesswords
I was raped last summer by a bartender at the bar that I was a well-known regular at. Ironically, it was a gay bar, and it was a male bartender. My case wasn't taken seriously by anyone and barely got mentioned to a judge (in my opinion).

I've come to the conclusion that it will never not hurt. I believe it's how we deal with it, who we have to help us, and how we choose to channel that pain that shapes us.

My girlfriend has helped me a lot. And moving away from where everything happened helped me get the ghosts of it all out of my system. I still think about it a lot, and I can't read or watch anything with it anymore. I hate that I have to censor parts of my life now because of something that happened to me. But we can't control the things that happen in our lives, and we can't always control the sudden emotions that it spurs.
09/11/2011
Contributor: married with children married with children
neither my wife or I have been abused. I feel terrible for everyone who has been abused.
09/13/2011
Contributor: Ryuson Ryuson
Options three and five
09/13/2011
Contributor: Beck Beck
Only one I did not vote for was other. I had a rough life as a child. If you ask me about I will tell all. I am not going to go into detail right here. I deal with it very well though.
09/13/2011
Contributor: MrWishyWashy MrWishyWashy
I am not. I am truly sorry to hear of other people's experience with this.
10/04/2011
Contributor: Apirka Apirka
I've been a victim of all of the above (and usually multiple times). I'm honestly surprised that I turned out as well as I have given my past. By that I just mean that I never turned to substances to "ease the pain" (I've only been a smoker), I've never self-harmed or acted promiscuously or anything else anyone might assume someone with my past might do. I do have my issues though, but that's obviously expected. I think at this point in my life, I'm more angry over what has happened to me instead or sad or upset or scared.
03/10/2012
Contributor: LusciousLollypop LusciousLollypop
My first year of college was rough. I ended up dropping out and moving away because of what happened. I didn't have sex for two years after that. I was scared to even go on dates. I didn't talk about it up until last year. (three years after it happened) and I didn't think about it or even feel it for three years. Now that I've told some people about it, meaning my grandmother and therapist.. I have nightmares about it when I didn't for three years and not thinking about it. I think I'd rather go back to that and not have the nightmares.
03/10/2012
Contributor: ViVix ViVix
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyGurl
This is not a public poll, all answers are private. This also doesn't require explanations. I was a victim of rape in high school and I guess I've been thinking about it lately and it just hurts all over again. I'm wondering who else has ... more
I've definitely said "no," and still had things forced on me.
06/05/2012
Contributor: Zandrock Zandrock
I have not
11/02/2012
Contributor: SourAppleMartini SourAppleMartini
I guess I can be classified as a victim of physical abuse.
05/27/2013
Contributor: sweisb4100 sweisb4100
I've watched quite a few people suffer because of sexual crimes. It hasn't happened to me. Unless it has happened to you, you couldn't understand the pain.
05/27/2013
Contributor: Pierced Blaqk Skies Pierced Blaqk Skies
I have experienced all of these listed on the poll with the exception of rape. I've pushed a lot of it out of my memory but some is still fresh with me and some, I think, will never fully go away.
05/27/2013
Contributor: Living Doll Living Doll
I was mentally, emotionally and verbally abused by my malignant narcissist dad since birth. I'm 26 now and just recently went completely and permanently no contact with him.
05/27/2013
Contributor: skeeterlynn skeeterlynn
Mental/Emotional.
05/27/2013
Contributor: satinlady550 satinlady550
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyGurl
This is not a public poll, all answers are private. This also doesn't require explanations. I was a victim of rape in high school and I guess I've been thinking about it lately and it just hurts all over again. I'm wondering who else has ... more
I have experienced a lot in my lifetime. I was molested by a family member when I was 8 years old and it continued for many years after. At 19 a boyfriend in college raped me while I was drinking at his apartment. Then when I finally began to trust again, I decided to get married and my husband, became very abusive, physically and mentally. I have been through a lot in my short life. Even though, my life has been such a mess it has taught me a lot about myself and I am a stronger because of these events.
05/27/2013