Your ex-friend sounds like a bitch. You supported him when he went, and you both knew the risks. For you to leave him now would be ridiculous. If you're really in love with someone, something like that shouldn't be enough of a problem for you to just give up. Remember how lucky you are that he came home, and enjoy what you do have.
Leave him, or stick by his side..what would you do
02/16/2011
I would stay with him, I mean, physical issues aside, he's still the same man you married. I would of course stay with him, and make sure he got all the help he needs to recover properly (knowing that I can't do absolutely everything for him).
02/19/2011
Quote:
Things have gotten a lot better over the years. Actually they have improved exponentially since the beginning of OIF(Operation Iraqi Freedom). Don't get me wrong, it is still tough to stay in the Army, or what ever service the person might be in if they have severe Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, but at least they will take care of you now. I was medically retired two years ago due to injuries that I suffered in Iraq, but the Army and VA have taken care of me completely since I came back messed up. The Army did surgeries on me that most major hospitals couldn't even dream of performing, and they have given me as much help on both the physical, mental, and monatary side as I could have ever hope. Now that I have recovered from everything, I'm almost as good as new. Now they are working with me to help me finish my Masters and they will pay me a really nice retirement, that includes free insurance for the rest of my life. The military is finally doing the right thing for their soldiers that have been wounded in combat.
Originally posted by
PussyGalore
I hope so. They weren't much help for my brother after Desert Storm. He was a great guy when left and he came back as a monster. Everything we knew about him before he left was changed over there. He told us a few of the stories, but didn't
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more
I hope so. They weren't much help for my brother after Desert Storm. He was a great guy when left and he came back as a monster. Everything we knew about him before he left was changed over there. He told us a few of the stories, but didn't give us much detail. He always tried to laugh it off but you could see it in his eyes. Whatever he was a part of will haunt him for the rest of his life.
To think that someone who comes back from an active tour hasn't changed is a disservice to everyone involved. less
To think that someone who comes back from an active tour hasn't changed is a disservice to everyone involved. less
02/28/2011
I'd stay. A lot worse could happen then losing a leg.
04/03/2011
ptsd would prob be more problematic than a missing leg
04/03/2011
there are lots of way to have an amazing sex life. If you can handle his wounds both physically and mentally then stay with him, the only reason I would see to leave him would be if he had changed for the worse because of his injuries and wouldn't get help.
04/04/2011
When you marry someone, you don't marry them for their body parts, you marry them for who they are. Losing a limb (or two) doesn't change who they are. I agree, it's that kind of thinking that makes the divorce rate so high. And an amazing sex life is a sex life with someone you love - you don't have to do acrobatic stunts for it to be amazing. Best wishes to both of you!
04/04/2011
I voted to probably stay with him. This is largely because I'd be fearful of any brain damage he might have. I had a friend in highschool whose father fell from a ladder and hit his head. He became violent and turned into what she called "the angry vegetable." I will love my man despite whatever physical changes he may deal with. But I don't know that I could stay with him and live in fear if he became eratic or tempermental after a head injury.
04/04/2011
Wish you the best of luck!
04/04/2011
When you love someone truly, you'll know what to do. You have to ask yourself what you want. It's really a shame if you don't still want him, because it sounds like he would be there for you if it happened to do. You sound more overwhelmed that you'll have to take care of him.
Lucky for you, I know a girl who had something similar happen two years ago. It was about a year of struggle, but her husband has learned to get around on his own much better, and their sex life is literally close to being normal again. A lot of it is the appearance factor, but it shouldn't matter if you love that person.
My fiance is in the air force, and has been for a while. This is something I've been afraid of for so long, but I am marrying him next month and could not be more proud. I will stay by him no matter what.
Lucky for you, I know a girl who had something similar happen two years ago. It was about a year of struggle, but her husband has learned to get around on his own much better, and their sex life is literally close to being normal again. A lot of it is the appearance factor, but it shouldn't matter if you love that person.
My fiance is in the air force, and has been for a while. This is something I've been afraid of for so long, but I am marrying him next month and could not be more proud. I will stay by him no matter what.
06/07/2011
he deserves the best you can give
06/07/2011
Oh my! My heart goes out to you and your friend. I'm so sorry. Kudos to you for being so strong and sticking with him. It'd be very hard, but I'd never leave my partner over that, EVER! Just because he's injured and will not have all of his limbs does not mean he's not still the person I'm devoted to and love. He would never leave me over that. He stuck by me through 4 years of illness and a surgery last year and I know it couldn't have been fun!
Anyways, I had an ex die less than a year ago over seas so I am so sorry for your friend the effects of this mess over seas is devastating! My ex was only 21 and he died serving his country. I think your friend deserves to be stood by and comforted after what he's been through. I couldn't imagine going through that and then being dumped on top of it! How awful!
Anyways, I had an ex die less than a year ago over seas so I am so sorry for your friend the effects of this mess over seas is devastating! My ex was only 21 and he died serving his country. I think your friend deserves to be stood by and comforted after what he's been through. I couldn't imagine going through that and then being dumped on top of it! How awful!
06/07/2011
Quote:
AMEN AMEN AMEN.
Originally posted by
Midway through
please tell your friend that you hope her vagina breaks and can't be used so that men will treat her the way that she wants you to treat your husband.
06/07/2011
you're doing a wonderful thing for your husband. ignore your friend; if you think of your husband before yourself (which it sounds like what you're doing right now), it will help both you and him grow. and what's better than helping someone you love right?
06/07/2011
IMO, if you love someone, you stick by their side. ESP. the more they need you. Forgive me for saying I find your friend pretty heartless. That's so hard. So hard, it really is, but imagine how hard it is on him & the feelings & fears he has over it. You wouldn't want to leave through those emotions either. I know it's a sacrifice, but that's part of love, sacrificing yourself. So much love & strength to the both of you.
06/07/2011
Quote:
I third that motion. Perfectly stated!
Originally posted by
ToyGurl
AMEN AMEN AMEN.
And I meant to say "live" through those emotions.
06/07/2011
Quote:
It's love that matters. I think anyone who would leave a loved one just because they lost a limb is a jerk. That's my opinion. Don't want to offend anyone but if your friend's primary concern is sex? That's ridiculous. It's love that matters. Good for you for sticking with the love you found. You're lucky.
Originally posted by
usmcwife99
Would you leave a marrige only because you husband came back from oversees severly wounded and a "hinderance to your relationship" as my old friend put it. When I say severly wounded I am talking a left leg amputated at the knee. Left arm
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more
Would you leave a marrige only because you husband came back from oversees severly wounded and a "hinderance to your relationship" as my old friend put it. When I say severly wounded I am talking a left leg amputated at the knee. Left arm from the shoulder lost. Broken write wrist(witch will heal) and three broken ribs(witch wil heel over time). Also no heering in his left ear. The biggest issue us a little bit of memory loss. He rembers alot of stuff just a few things/people(like who won the superbowl last year, what year he gradutated highschool etc) hes forgot. But he rembers all the major stuff and close family and friends.
My old friend(ive said screw her) thinks ime crazy for staying with him. She thinks is a joke that ime willing to help him through recovery. Prostetic leg and arm is possible but not for at least a year. She really got stumped on the fact that "gosh your sex life is gonna suck" witch it may not be the best but thats ok.
I am deffintily staying at his side but what would you do? less
My old friend(ive said screw her) thinks ime crazy for staying with him. She thinks is a joke that ime willing to help him through recovery. Prostetic leg and arm is possible but not for at least a year. She really got stumped on the fact that "gosh your sex life is gonna suck" witch it may not be the best but thats ok.
I am deffintily staying at his side but what would you do? less
06/07/2011
If you love someone, you stay with them. End of story.
03/22/2012
If you love him, y'all can make it. If my husband went over seas to fight for my freedom and came back in that condition I would stick with him and help him through it. But! If you don't love him, and are only helping him out of guilt, do him a favor and leave him. Otherwise, staying with him and helping him get back to himself is the best thing you can do and it will strengthen your marriage.
03/22/2012
3 voted "probably leave him".Wonder why they didn't expand on their reasoning here.
03/22/2012
That's awful. I'd never leave someone because they got injured. Stick with him.
03/22/2012
I would stick with him. If he needs you, that is not when you run out on them. I'd probably beat my friends ass for saying something like that. Like you need to hear about how awful your life is going to be. You are already going through enough stressful things. She should just try to be a friend and be there for you, instead she is not.
03/22/2012
Quote:
he should be a lot more flexible and light weight with the limbs gone, so as long as his dick works sex should be better than ever! and plus he'll love you even more for staying with him despite his injuries
Originally posted by
usmcwife99
Would you leave a marrige only because you husband came back from oversees severly wounded and a "hinderance to your relationship" as my old friend put it. When I say severly wounded I am talking a left leg amputated at the knee. Left arm
...
more
Would you leave a marrige only because you husband came back from oversees severly wounded and a "hinderance to your relationship" as my old friend put it. When I say severly wounded I am talking a left leg amputated at the knee. Left arm from the shoulder lost. Broken write wrist(witch will heal) and three broken ribs(witch wil heel over time). Also no heering in his left ear. The biggest issue us a little bit of memory loss. He rembers alot of stuff just a few things/people(like who won the superbowl last year, what year he gradutated highschool etc) hes forgot. But he rembers all the major stuff and close family and friends.
My old friend(ive said screw her) thinks ime crazy for staying with him. She thinks is a joke that ime willing to help him through recovery. Prostetic leg and arm is possible but not for at least a year. She really got stumped on the fact that "gosh your sex life is gonna suck" witch it may not be the best but thats ok.
I am deffintily staying at his side but what would you do? less
My old friend(ive said screw her) thinks ime crazy for staying with him. She thinks is a joke that ime willing to help him through recovery. Prostetic leg and arm is possible but not for at least a year. She really got stumped on the fact that "gosh your sex life is gonna suck" witch it may not be the best but thats ok.
I am deffintily staying at his side but what would you do? less
03/22/2012
Quote:
I'd most likely stay with him, but only if he put in the effort to get "better" (I know limbs don't re-grow obviously). I know some people who get injured and then just live with the "woe is me" attitude. That, I couldn't stay for.
Originally posted by
usmcwife99
Would you leave a marrige only because you husband came back from oversees severly wounded and a "hinderance to your relationship" as my old friend put it. When I say severly wounded I am talking a left leg amputated at the knee. Left arm
...
more
Would you leave a marrige only because you husband came back from oversees severly wounded and a "hinderance to your relationship" as my old friend put it. When I say severly wounded I am talking a left leg amputated at the knee. Left arm from the shoulder lost. Broken write wrist(witch will heal) and three broken ribs(witch wil heel over time). Also no heering in his left ear. The biggest issue us a little bit of memory loss. He rembers alot of stuff just a few things/people(like who won the superbowl last year, what year he gradutated highschool etc) hes forgot. But he rembers all the major stuff and close family and friends.
My old friend(ive said screw her) thinks ime crazy for staying with him. She thinks is a joke that ime willing to help him through recovery. Prostetic leg and arm is possible but not for at least a year. She really got stumped on the fact that "gosh your sex life is gonna suck" witch it may not be the best but thats ok.
I am deffintily staying at his side but what would you do? less
My old friend(ive said screw her) thinks ime crazy for staying with him. She thinks is a joke that ime willing to help him through recovery. Prostetic leg and arm is possible but not for at least a year. She really got stumped on the fact that "gosh your sex life is gonna suck" witch it may not be the best but thats ok.
I am deffintily staying at his side but what would you do? less
03/22/2012
Quote:
This post is so old but I'm just now seeing it. I cannot believe ANYONE would say something like that to you. That is NOT a friend. She has no respect for you OR him.
Originally posted by
usmcwife99
Would you leave a marrige only because you husband came back from oversees severly wounded and a "hinderance to your relationship" as my old friend put it. When I say severly wounded I am talking a left leg amputated at the knee. Left arm
...
more
Would you leave a marrige only because you husband came back from oversees severly wounded and a "hinderance to your relationship" as my old friend put it. When I say severly wounded I am talking a left leg amputated at the knee. Left arm from the shoulder lost. Broken write wrist(witch will heal) and three broken ribs(witch wil heel over time). Also no heering in his left ear. The biggest issue us a little bit of memory loss. He rembers alot of stuff just a few things/people(like who won the superbowl last year, what year he gradutated highschool etc) hes forgot. But he rembers all the major stuff and close family and friends.
My old friend(ive said screw her) thinks ime crazy for staying with him. She thinks is a joke that ime willing to help him through recovery. Prostetic leg and arm is possible but not for at least a year. She really got stumped on the fact that "gosh your sex life is gonna suck" witch it may not be the best but thats ok.
I am deffintily staying at his side but what would you do? less
My old friend(ive said screw her) thinks ime crazy for staying with him. She thinks is a joke that ime willing to help him through recovery. Prostetic leg and arm is possible but not for at least a year. She really got stumped on the fact that "gosh your sex life is gonna suck" witch it may not be the best but thats ok.
I am deffintily staying at his side but what would you do? less
I think it's great that you are staying. I would too. The only way I would leave is cheating or if things just didn't work out (whether he was injured or not). Staying with him because you love HIM, the person he is INSIDE is what matters, staying with him because you feel bad or guilty is wrong but it sounds like you loved him before and still love him and that's how it should be. I don't care if my guy lost a limb, I'd still love him. As long as you are in love then "through sickness and in health" still matters. Good for you. I hope you two are still going strong today. I can understand it can be traumatic for both people involved but that is TRUE love, what you have and what I love to hear about it. Your story made me smile . He is a lucky guy and he deserves a good-hearted woman after what he has done and been through and LIVED. I probably would have punched her in the face if she said that crap to me. What an insensitive asshole!
Your sex life won't be the SAME but that doesn't mean it is going to suck! He can still have sex with you in certain positions/ways. You have toys to add in, liberator furniture could really come in handy now. You learn what works and try new things, adapt.
03/22/2012
stay with him
03/22/2012
I would definitely stay with my husband if he had any kind of injury or illness, and I'd expect the same from him. God help any man your friend is committed to...she sounds like an extremely shallow and selfish person.
03/07/2013
Quote:
if i loved a person before, i would love them after.
Originally posted by
usmcwife99
Would you leave a marrige only because you husband came back from oversees severly wounded and a "hinderance to your relationship" as my old friend put it. When I say severly wounded I am talking a left leg amputated at the knee. Left arm
...
more
Would you leave a marrige only because you husband came back from oversees severly wounded and a "hinderance to your relationship" as my old friend put it. When I say severly wounded I am talking a left leg amputated at the knee. Left arm from the shoulder lost. Broken write wrist(witch will heal) and three broken ribs(witch wil heel over time). Also no heering in his left ear. The biggest issue us a little bit of memory loss. He rembers alot of stuff just a few things/people(like who won the superbowl last year, what year he gradutated highschool etc) hes forgot. But he rembers all the major stuff and close family and friends.
My old friend(ive said screw her) thinks ime crazy for staying with him. She thinks is a joke that ime willing to help him through recovery. Prostetic leg and arm is possible but not for at least a year. She really got stumped on the fact that "gosh your sex life is gonna suck" witch it may not be the best but thats ok.
I am deffintily staying at his side but what would you do? less
My old friend(ive said screw her) thinks ime crazy for staying with him. She thinks is a joke that ime willing to help him through recovery. Prostetic leg and arm is possible but not for at least a year. She really got stumped on the fact that "gosh your sex life is gonna suck" witch it may not be the best but thats ok.
I am deffintily staying at his side but what would you do? less
03/07/2013
I'd still love him as much as I always had. You're a wonderful person!
03/07/2013