Purpleladybug Purpleladybug
I had a miscarriage back in March and it has been one of the hardest things I have been through in my life. One thing I noticed was that at the book store there are all kinds of books on "What to expect when expecting" and Baby names but only very few if any books on the subject of miscarriage and infant loss. There are actually more books on autism then there are miscarriage. After I had the miscarriage alot of people came out to me sharing there own stories of loss. It seems like miscarraige is a subject that is rarley talked about even today.
Have any of you had or know anyone who has had a miscarriage? I just really like talking to someone who has been through it themselves and can understand where I come from because it has been very rough for me.
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Peggi Peggi
I am so sorry for your loss. I not only do know a few people who have been through this terrible ordeal, one recently, but I have experienced this myself. The first time I miscarried was after having gotten in a car-related accident, while in the beginnings of my 8th month. Although I planned to adopt them out, because I was too young to take care of children, I actually had to attend therapy because I blamed myself and was extremely depressed, for a very long time, and this was years ago, but the pain of that never leaves you. I was lucky to have held the pregnancy for that long, though, because I have some internal issues involving my uterus that makes getting and most importantly staying pregnant, very difficult. Aside from that, I've had two other miscarriages, both early on.

You're very right, though, there are so many books on how to cope with problems once your child is born, but never any on how to cope with loss before they are born. And you would think, that because of the devastation a mother (and the father!) has when they lose a child even before the child is born, there would be more out there!

I did find, though, that there are a lot of support groups both online and in person therapy sessions, for parents who have suffered with a miscarriage.

I hope that you have or will find peace and recovery emotionally through this ordeal.

One of my best friends just had a miscarriage at 7 weeks, she had one of the IUD's taken out and because the lining of her uterus was still so thin and weak after having just had it out and getting pregnant right away, she bled a lot through the beginnings and was told she probably wouldn't be able to keep the baby but she certainly tried, she has a 3 year old keeping her mind occupied but she still has those moments of depression due to it.
That Man from Mars That Man from Mars
I'm very sorry to hear that. My sister had a miscarriage and I was the only one around (I was 13 at the time) and had to wrap it up so we could bring it with us to the hospital. It was very hard and I still feel so bad for her.
tooshy tooshy
Wow, sorry for everyone that's gone through this.

I lost two in between my kids and almost lost my second child too. My first was almost dead when born. Miscarriage stinks.
P'Gell P'Gell
I've had several miscarraiges. Two or three. One in which I needed to go to the ER and have a D&C to remove the material that was left over.

I'm sorry you're so sad. There are a lot of books on miscarriage, I know our library has quite a few. I didn't buy any, because I knew I would heal and didn't want them around afterward to make me sad. I took them out of the library. Also, I'm not a fan of the "What to Expect" series. They are REALLY out of date and full of Freudian garbage. I'd recommend ANYTHING by William and Martha Sears, Penelope Leach, La Leche League etc far over "What to Expect."

I hope you can find some data to help you. Miscarriage does heal, but it takes some time. I was 7 months pregnant with my second daughter and one day just started crying and couldn't stop. I realized it was because it was the baby-who-never-was would have been born that day, if it had made it. After that anniversary, I got a lot better. I had an other miscarriage, and I had not yet taken a pregnancy test, so it wasn't as rough.

Hugs to you. It hurts but you will heal.
Purpleladybug Purpleladybug
Thanks everyone for sharing!!
Ryuson Ryuson
My mum had one before she had me and she never really likes to talk about it; I can;t imagine how upsetting that must be!
married with children married with children
we have never had one, so I cant begin to know what you are going through. I am sorry for your loss, and will keep you in my prayers.
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