Okay, outside of the military argument that's brewing...
1) Get a POB, unless you are close enough to someone to have them receive your packages. Personally, I haven't been comfortable having anyone receive sex-toy packages for me.. So a p.o. box is my suggestion.
2) I assume you have a job? Are you in school? Just curious. If you can't afford to move out, start exploring options. If you aren't in school, maybe pick up a trade. Or look into one
If you have a job, are you planned for a raise anytime soon? Do other companies (or stores, facilities, etc) pay higher rates?
If you have a job, but aren't committed to it (like sales person or something), maybe you should consider canvasing through a company like Grassroots Campaigns or Public Outreach. They pay well, it's difficult work but if you're good at talking with people, then it's very flexible and doable. At least, with Grassroots Campaigns, there is limited supervision & if you're running to the bathroom every few minutes... no one really cares as long as you are fundraising.
3) Don't try to fight any more with your father. He's a dick, obviously, and he seems to think he is right no matter what because he financially puts you up. Okay, to some extent, he is right.. If you do anything he doesn't like, GRR he can throw you out.
So, when I was in this situation, I just lied low. Saved funds. Figured things out. I bit my tongue a lot.
But if shelter is most important to you, then you need to stay here for now. Might as well try to make it easier on yourself by staying under his radar.
As for the military argument... I have many military family members, and I know a lot of people who have chosen that lifestyle as well. There's nothing wrong with it. But to assume that someone you don't know wants to and can just join the military, no problem, is a bit silly. People have disabilities, issues, beliefs that sometimes don't line up with military lifestyle.
And it's not that easy. A couple months ago, didn't anyone read that the gov't has put even MORE hiring/recruiting freezes on the military?
My boyfriend has been trying to get in for two years now without any luck, because of a tattoo that is visible in PT gear. (ok, given, he is going for the marines... for the officer program.. but still, the inspector general could not get him in with personal recommendations.)
The smallest things can disqualify you from being able to join the services.
It's not a cure-all answer.