Mom found my toys: Need advice!

Well, I AM confrontational, at least if I'm deeply hurt, but I DO agree with jr2012! You are only going to give her more opportunity to hurt you & project her neurosis about the subject, if you try and address it. Unfortunately, because she's your mom, you probably won't find advice helpful if it requires you to cut her off completely. Your next best bet is to limit her ability to hurt you. I think you know that she has a deep seated problem about sex if her attitude toward it caused her to lash out at her own child like that! Frankly, it's none of her business what you do or don't do with your own body if no one is being hurt.

If she brings it up again, be prepared with a statement to cut her off & then leave. Here are a few things you can say:
-she doesn't need to go there again- you heard her the first time
- you refuse to discuss it
-you're an adult & this in NOT her business
-you didn't ask for/don't appreciate her opinion
-how dare she call you names/don't ever talk to me like that
-if you want respect from me, then treat me with the same
-if she expects to continue to have a relationship with you, she better _________(fill in the blank...treat you like an adult, not be insulting & call you names, keep an appropriate boundary between two adults about sex, etc.)

I think you know that she is irrational on the subject, so engaging her is only going to annoy you more & possibly let her hurt you, so don't allow it, or at best, avoid it. But it's smart to be prepared to draw your line in the sand in case you need to. I find it always best to keep it simple with emotional people/topics, state your position & retreat. With any luck, this won't come up again, but I am so sorry she hurt your feelings like that! It's a miracle you grew up without shame about masturbation!

I would ignore her, and when you can't, tell her to get off the soap box. I'm sorry this is happening to you. My mom is rather judgmental of my toy collection too. Apparently if you own a dildo, you're a freak. She sees it as gross, and doesn't get it. I just ignore her and if she gets in my face about it, I walk away. It has nothing to do with her. I do get upset that she brings it up to unsuspecting family members and random people. That's when I get stern with her and tell her that it's none of her business discussing it with anybody. I dunno, I hope it gets better for you, and get to focus on loving your toys and not hiding them.

I think Wicked Wahine gave sage advice. The only thing I can add is a reminder that no matter what your mom thinks or says, there's nothing wrong with enjoying your sexuality in a safe way. Don't let her project her fear and neurosis on to you. You are perfectly healthy, and having way more fun.

She found the WMD's, Thanks for commenting, it always helps to hear from someone with similar experience, I'm sure it helped.

Parents never see any aspect of their kids life as "not their business". I would just keep the lines of communication open and just tell her you respect her opinion and request she respect your decision about it.