When I was younger I used to regularly go out and do things or see people I didn't want to because I felt obligated. Nowadays I've decided to put myself first and do what I want, which sometimes means canceling on people. I always call, though.
Reality or bad manners? (poll about flaking on plans)
07/20/2011
In general, I don't think a lot of people find it rude, so perhaps it has become the norm. I am a pushover, so when people cancel on me, I just give an enthusiastic "Ok! Next time!" I'm trying really hard to change!
I would also say that it depends on why the canceled. If they canceled because their husband had a flat tire on his way home from work and couldn't take the kids to practice, because of an illness, because of some out of control event, then I get it. If it's like my friends sometimes do and it's just a "I feel like staying in" or "I'm actually kinda busy," then I'm pissed.
I would also say that it depends on why the canceled. If they canceled because their husband had a flat tire on his way home from work and couldn't take the kids to practice, because of an illness, because of some out of control event, then I get it. If it's like my friends sometimes do and it's just a "I feel like staying in" or "I'm actually kinda busy," then I'm pissed.
07/20/2011
Depending on the reason that is very rude.
07/20/2011
Such people easily become too annoying to try anything with.
07/20/2011
This has been happening to me this summer as well. Most of the time, I'm usually upset but in a few instances, I can understand. The one friend I really depend on has a job that keeps her busy and when she's not working, she's dealing with family drama. So, I accept this from her. But my other friends, I don't. I know enough about their lives to know that when they say they have free time, they have free time and nothing should come in between the plans we make.
07/20/2011
Quote:
I think it's bad manners. I hate when that happens to me.
Originally posted by
liilii080
I've made plans with two different girl friends over the last few weeks and each time, the day we're supposed to go out, they call and cancel and this drives me crazy! My younger sister says that's just the way this generation is but I
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I've made plans with two different girl friends over the last few weeks and each time, the day we're supposed to go out, they call and cancel and this drives me crazy! My younger sister says that's just the way this generation is but I think it's bad manners. What do you think?
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07/20/2011
This just happened to me yesterday. And it's not the first time in recent weeks that these people have done the exact same thing. I personally think it's just rude. Every once in a while is understandable, but when it becomes a pattern I'd rather you just not make the plans with me in the first place.
09/17/2011
Quote:
Sadly true. In MANY things, "rude" has become a new "normal".
Originally posted by
Illusional
It's rude but it's the new norm.
My friend and I made plans to go out
I dolled up, called and confirmed.
I walked three miles to the diner we were gonna meet at
Waited over 2 hours
And called and texted, ... more
My friend and I made plans to go out
I dolled up, called and confirmed.
I walked three miles to the diner we were gonna meet at
Waited over 2 hours
And called and texted, ... more
It's rude but it's the new norm.
My friend and I made plans to go out
I dolled up, called and confirmed.
I walked three miles to the diner we were gonna meet at
Waited over 2 hours
And called and texted, nothing
Finally around 11, she's like I got distracted, night. less
My friend and I made plans to go out
I dolled up, called and confirmed.
I walked three miles to the diner we were gonna meet at
Waited over 2 hours
And called and texted, nothing
Finally around 11, she's like I got distracted, night. less
09/17/2011
Depends on the why. Things happen.
09/17/2011
I have a friend like that who constantly flakes out on everything. I have gotten to the point of not making plans with them. Sad but true.
09/17/2011
It's rude. I won't cancel without a very good reason, and I expect the same in return.
09/17/2011
Personally, I think it's rude.
But the truth of the matter is this generation wasn't taught manners/etiquette.
But the truth of the matter is this generation wasn't taught manners/etiquette.
09/17/2011
I personally don't mind if someone has to cancel their plans, but I want to know if you can't be there in advance so I can do something else with someone else or whatever. my big pet peeve is someone scraps their plans like five minutes beforehand and then tells me. JUST TELL ME AND I WON'T BE ANGRY
p.s. meant to pick a different option, not I think it's rude
p.s. meant to pick a different option, not I think it's rude
09/18/2011
I HAAAATTTTTEEEE it when people flake i once bought 2 concert tickets to see my fav band 200.00 a ticket for floor to go see blur, and at the time i didnt have a car so i bought my so called friend shelly aka cunt face, her ticket and she said she would drive to the show and i would pay for gas and everything and that little cunt flaked on me the day before the concert and i ended up not being able to go and she never payed me back for the ticket. so stoped talking to her after that and later slashed her fucking tires, her tires are about 200.00 a piece.
12/05/2011
I have had the same problem with friends lately, more and more often. I get very little free time so when I actually get a day to myself I plan something a week or more ahead of time. When people cancel it drives me nuts. The only time I flake out on plans is if I am sick with the flu or something else contagious, and then I consider it good manners not to expose people to it.
12/30/2011
I hate that! That's just bad manners.
02/18/2012
I think it is rude if you do it last minute, or for a silly reason. If there is a legitimate reason, or they give you enough notice, it doesn't seem as rude to me.
02/18/2012
That is just rude and bad manners.
09/30/2012
tsk tsk
09/30/2012
That is just rude and bad manners
09/30/2012
If they have kids, I can understand. I work graveyard shift full time, have 2 kids, a husband, and go to college full time. If I wake up with that feeling that I am not all there that day, yes I will cancel, but I hope my friend is understanding of my situation. Sometimes, sleep is more necessary than grabbing a coffee. But, to avoid this I usually just don't make plans to see anyone.
09/30/2012
I have a younger friend from work who continually makes plans with me to go shopping and do all kinds of things and we literally have never done anything. She won't return calls or comes up with some wild shit why we can't do it today. I told her right out that I wont make any more plans with her again.
09/30/2012
My friends do it, as well. It honestly might be that your level of importance to them probably isn't the highest. Sometimes, things do come up, but when/if they do, it should be explained and they should be more than eager to make new plans with you. If not, they're probably flaking because they're being rude/ungracious. It really differs from situation to situation, but me personally, I gave my friends the benefit of the doubt and they keep doing it again and again. Eventually, I brought it up and let them know how I felt, and that was that.
09/30/2012
It depends a lot on their reasons. It's entirely possible that they both had legitimate reasons, and were embarrassed to tell you. I've also had people who were just flakey, and cancelled on a regular basis. I don't plan around them, and most of my friends are reliable
09/30/2012
It is bad manners, unless it was a true emergency situation.
09/30/2012
it's extremely annoying to me.
09/30/2012
Flaking may be the new norm, but it's still bad manners
10/16/2012
cant be mad maybe something came up. Ive cancelled plans without giving a reason and dont need to. I once cancelled plans with a girl because I had to visit my sister in the hospital and she was mad I cancelled started fighting with me and i just hung up. Its not bad manners unless they leave you hanging and dont call. thats just rude
10/16/2012
rude
10/17/2012
This happens often to me. I find it rather rude. I do understand that sometimes things come up that they -need- to cancel, but everyone who flakes on me, they just never show up. I might get a call the next day telling me they forgot or they suddenly made plans with some other person or randomly met some person the night before and decided to spend the whole day with them. So I've just gotten to where I don't bother contacting them and when they contact me, I don't expect them to ever show up.
10/17/2012