You Will Never Believe This...(Get ready to laugh!!)

Contributor: js250 js250
Yesterday when we took our little dogs out for their mountain walk I had quite the...ummmm...experien ce!!

For starters, I found a crumpled dollar bill in a pull off area. Then we went to clean up targets and beer cans in a well used party area. (We do this to keep the forest clean and also make a good amount of money on the bullet lead, ammo brass and cans.)

I was picking up a few cans and when I stepped forward and looked down....there was a 2" penis laying on the ground! Yes, it was a penis...I picked it up and told my hubby he was not going to believe this one! He died laughing, and told me only me...could find a penis in the mountains.So...

I walked around the rock in front of the 'penis spot' and lo and behold!! Id there wasn't a nice Schrade knife laying in my path! By this time I was absolutely hysterical, my little dog was frantic thinking I was crying and my hubby was looking at me like I had lost my mind. He walked over, took a good look at the knife in my hand-beside the little penis--and walked rapidly away...I told him the area was going to be known as the Bobbit area and to watch for a castrated leprechaun. He cut off my energy drinks!! (That was okay, I had a beer stashed in my purse, lol!!) It was pretty entertaining!!

It was a rubber penis pencil topper....
06/23/2013
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Contributor: LoveX LoveX
What in the world? So, what was the penis off of?
06/23/2013
Contributor: Wicked Wahine Wicked Wahine
OMG, did you report this?! At least the dog didn't find it first! I am concerned as to what animal this penis was cut from, it is upsetting to me, whether from a person, or other creature! I do see the humor in you finding it, but can't get past the upset of thinking...well, you know what? What I need is to not dwell on things that are out of my control, right? That takes practice for me, I guess.

I respect you for cleaning up other's messes, whether or not you are recycling. You are keeping the forest cleaner, good for you!
06/23/2013
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
OMG that is both horrible and hilarious. I'd never have picked it up but it makes me feel bad for whatever creature it came from. Possibly a squirrel? (Ugh, now I'm sick to my stomach over it.)
06/23/2013
Contributor: Wicked Wahine Wicked Wahine
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
OMG that is both horrible and hilarious. I'd never have picked it up but it makes me feel bad for whatever creature it came from. Possibly a squirrel? (Ugh, now I'm sick to my stomach over it.)
I had the same mixed reaction and am still sick about it!
06/23/2013
Contributor: snowminx snowminx
I can only guess that it was a human penis since she said "castrated leprechaun", making me think theoretically a leprechaun is a small person that would have a small penis.
06/23/2013
Contributor: js250 js250
OMG!!! I am so sorry!!

It is a rubber penis pencil topper....crap--that is what I get for laughing again while posting. And SERIOUSLY...did you seriously think I would actually pick up a REAL one!!! Oh...HELL NO!!!!! I would have run so fast the truck wouldn't have caught up with me--and my hubby can drive fast!
06/23/2013
Contributor: PropertyOfPotter PropertyOfPotter
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
OMG!!! I am so sorry!!

It is a rubber penis pencil topper....crap--that is what I get for laughing again while posting. And SERIOUSLY...did you seriously think I would actually pick up a REAL one!!! Oh...HELL NO!!!!! I would have run so fast ... more
I was also very confused by your post, so I didn't reply to it!
06/23/2013
Contributor: snowminx snowminx
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
OMG!!! I am so sorry!!

It is a rubber penis pencil topper....crap--that is what I get for laughing again while posting. And SERIOUSLY...did you seriously think I would actually pick up a REAL one!!! Oh...HELL NO!!!!! I would have run so fast ... more
Well you said you were picking up cans and trash so I thought maybe you had one of those claw grabber things or at least have gloves on and not know what you were picked up till you brushed it off.
But yeah now that I know it was a pencil topper that is pretty funny.
06/23/2013
Contributor: js250 js250
Quote:
Originally posted by PropertyOfPotter
I was also very confused by your post, so I didn't reply to it!
I was laughing and did not get my brain glitch....
06/23/2013
Contributor: Alex Time Alex Time
Lol. Okay, now that you cleared that up I can see the humor in your story. I figured you were a little loopy laughing at castrated leprechauns!
06/23/2013
Contributor: a whole lot of birds. a whole lot of birds.
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
Yesterday when we took our little dogs out for their mountain walk I had quite the...ummmm...experien ce!!For starters, I found a crumpled dollar bill in a pull off area. Then we went to clean up targets and beer cans in a well used party area. (We ... more
ha hahaha hahaahahaha
what a kneeslapper!
it's like the leprechaun got his junk ripped off
06/23/2013
Contributor: a whole lot of birds. a whole lot of birds.
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
OMG!!! I am so sorry!!

It is a rubber penis pencil topper....crap--that is what I get for laughing again while posting. And SERIOUSLY...did you seriously think I would actually pick up a REAL one!!! Oh...HELL NO!!!!! I would have run so fast ... more
thank you bc my initial reaction was 'did she pick up a dildo in the forest'
06/23/2013
Contributor: Wicked Wahine Wicked Wahine
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
OMG!!! I am so sorry!!

It is a rubber penis pencil topper....crap--that is what I get for laughing again while posting. And SERIOUSLY...did you seriously think I would actually pick up a REAL one!!! Oh...HELL NO!!!!! I would have run so fast ... more
I feel a lot better now, thanks for the additional info! I really was a little upset about it. Now, of course that is funny when you know all that. I still think it's great you go clean up!
06/23/2013
Contributor: edeneve edeneve
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
OMG!!! I am so sorry!!

It is a rubber penis pencil topper....crap--that is what I get for laughing again while posting. And SERIOUSLY...did you seriously think I would actually pick up a REAL one!!! Oh...HELL NO!!!!! I would have run so fast ... more
yes dear, I wouldn't put anything past you - nah, you wouldn't have run, that's not you. too funny, though.lol!!!
06/23/2013
Contributor: JinxPinx JinxPinx
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
OMG!!! I am so sorry!!

It is a rubber penis pencil topper....crap--that is what I get for laughing again while posting. And SERIOUSLY...did you seriously think I would actually pick up a REAL one!!! Oh...HELL NO!!!!! I would have run so fast ... more
well thank goodness!! O _ O lol
06/24/2013
Contributor: GingerSpice GingerSpice
hahaha!! hilarious,this reminds me of a few years back i was invited to a halloween party thrown by some younger people at my work, so me and my guy were the bobbits and noone knew who we were, it was disappointing becuase it was the best couple costume ever...i wore my jammies and a sleep mask carried around a bloody knife, and he had on jammie pants all bloodied up, and had one of my dildos in an evidence bag.... lol

seems like a fun time in the woods..lol, luckily it was only a pencil topper!! thanks for the laughs
06/26/2013
Contributor: Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by Wicked Wahine
OMG, did you report this?! At least the dog didn't find it first! I am concerned as to what animal this penis was cut from, it is upsetting to me, whether from a person, or other creature! I do see the humor in you finding it, but can't get ... more
You didn't read the whole post. It was a RUBBER PENIS PENCIL TOPPER.

link


Not exactly something one "reports".
06/26/2013
Contributor: pootpootpoot pootpootpoot
Quote:
Originally posted by Bignuf
You didn't read the whole post. It was a RUBBER PENIS PENCIL TOPPER.

link


Not exactly something one "reports".
Originally the post just said "a 2 inch penis", and was later edited by Stormy to end the confusion and alarm.
06/26/2013