To what degree have you actually controlled the course your life has taken?

Wicked Wahine Wicked Wahine
I have tried like crazy to control the course my life has taken. I had plans and I've had to change them time and again, but I never expected to have all my planning be for naught. My body and circumstances beyond my control have landed me where I am today. (I joke that I am a type A in a type B body, if you know what that means, lol!)

So, my answer would be that I controlled about 40%, how about you?
07/25/2013
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RonLee RonLee
My life has been one roll of the dice after another. It has not always had a negative outcome though.
ex... Some years ago, I was looking for work at a university and could not find its location, so I asked someone in a different office where the personnel office was. The person I asked thought I was a prospective grad student rather than a possible fellow employee. She told me I had to take the GMAT, but I was in luck I could take it that day. I knew of course that she was confused, but I thought what the hell, why not. So I paid the fee and took the test. I subsequently did find the personnel office, but did not get the job. Months later I was working in a different town at a rather crappy job and got a letter from a different university that offered me a graduate assistantship with a tuition waiver and pay because I had scored so well on the GMAT. So I accepted the offer and quit my crappy job and instead earned a graduate degree.
LOL one roll of the dice after another.
07/26/2013
Trysexual Trysexual
Quote:
Originally posted by RonLee
My life has been one roll of the dice after another. It has not always had a negative outcome though.
ex... Some years ago, I was looking for work at a university and could not find its location, so I asked someone in a different office where ... More
heh..cool story...I got an application for my college free. I wasn't seriously considering going there, but ended up there for better or worse. I have great memories from there, but kinda wish I took a different major.
07/26/2013
Wicked Wahine Wicked Wahine
Quote:
Originally posted by RonLee
My life has been one roll of the dice after another. It has not always had a negative outcome though.
ex... Some years ago, I was looking for work at a university and could not find its location, so I asked someone in a different office where ... More
What a fabulous story, RonLee! You remind me of my sister in that that kind of stuff happens to her all the time. I swear, you may think she didn't make the best decision, or was not going in the 'best' direction and low and behold, she lands in clover every time, even if it's months, or years later! Granted, she is a hell of a hard working woman with a strong drive, but the whole family has marveled at her lifelong perspicacity combined with sheer luck (intuition?)!

You just never really know how your actions can affect you later on, for example the test you took leading to a graduate degree you hadn't expected. I started another discussion, What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you? and think it ties into this. Those judgments people make can affect your opportunities, even if you don't see it outright. (I don't think it's realistic to not care at all about how you are judged.) Anyway, I would like to see what you have to say about that topic, if you feel so inclined.
07/26/2013
lana'sart lana'sart
Quote:
Originally posted by Wicked Wahine
I have tried like crazy to control the course my life has taken. I had plans and I've had to change them time and again, but I never expected to have all my planning be for naught. My body and circumstances beyond my control have landed me where ... More
52%
07/26/2013
Ansley Ansley
I think I've pretty much controlled how my life has gone. I've succeeded in landing the jobs I want, the people I want around me and I've never not had a plan come together in the end. There are always going to be minor changes that need to be made, but that's because we can't see the future and you never know what curve ball will come your way. Just depends on how you handle it. KnowhatImean?
07/26/2013
stacylyn12 stacylyn12
Quote:
Originally posted by Wicked Wahine
I have tried like crazy to control the course my life has taken. I had plans and I've had to change them time and again, but I never expected to have all my planning be for naught. My body and circumstances beyond my control have landed me where ... More
75%
07/26/2013
Wicked Wahine Wicked Wahine
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
I think I've pretty much controlled how my life has gone. I've succeeded in landing the jobs I want, the people I want around me and I've never not had a plan come together in the end. There are always going to be minor changes that need ... More
I do know what you mean. I also am not in the least surprised that you answered as you did based on what I know about you! I would have guessed you had a plan(s) & you would bust ass to see them come to fruition. I believe you see yourself as successful because you do roll with the unforeseen punches and don't let them derail you. You adjust course and keep going, that is the sign of someone who has good coping mechanisms, good for you!
07/26/2013
Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by Wicked Wahine
I do know what you mean. I also am not in the least surprised that you answered as you did based on what I know about you! I would have guessed you had a plan(s) & you would bust ass to see them come to fruition. I believe you see yourself as ... More
It's kind of crazy because when I was in my early twenties I was always being told that I was one of those people who "falls into a pile of dung and comes out smelling like a rose" and I don't know how it happened, but looking back it's true. I just refuse to give up and the even crazier thing is that when I was going through a lot of things I faced during those times, I thought that I was never going to see the other side but I just couldn't stop believing that it was somehow meant to be. I think the only thing that really ever fell into my lap was my position at Eden. I didn't set out to become part of the staff but after spending about six months here in the community I was like, wow this is a really cool place and I'd love to be a part of what makes it awesome. This may come of as humble-bragging, but I've been an admin since my very first job, I've worked in various industries on both sides of the fence -- Fortune 500's and mom&pop places, there's an upside and a downside to both and I've just always felt very at home here.

It's weird because once you develop a set of coping skills, you wonder how it is that you lived without them. It's a very gratifying and amazing feeling to pull yourself up by your boot straps.
07/29/2013
Wicked Wahine Wicked Wahine
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
It's kind of crazy because when I was in my early twenties I was always being told that I was one of those people who "falls into a pile of dung and comes out smelling like a rose" and I don't know how it happened, but looking back ... More
And all those helicopter kids are missing out on knowing what that's like! You remind me of my sister in many ways. I mentioned her above to RonLee and she is as you just described yourself, though I haven't heard her actually admit to ever having been unsure.

Back before the self-esteem building movement, pulling yourself up by your bootstraps and overcoming challenges was called building character and self-esteem! Now they remove all obstacles from the child's path and tell them that they are perfect the way they are. (Penn & Teller Bullshit did a good show about self-esteem, if you ever get the chance to watch it).
07/29/2013
babyrock babyrock
50/50 probably. when younger it's definitely less, but nowadays it's about the choices i make that determines what's next
07/30/2013
js250 js250
I am a huge believer in taking the open doors and letting fate place you where you need to go. Just keeping your goal in sight as a guide for the end of the paths you will take. I own a nationwide known business--it is a 'blue sky' business, which means you buy the name and have the reputation behind you but the specific retail business is individually owned by each owner.

I had a six figure income when the economy crashed. The crash reduced my clientele drastically--no more real estate agents, contractors, small business startups, etc. My business was going to hell in a hurry. I hung in there and managed to make the little amount of money coming in do three times the amount of work it should have been able to cover by taking chances on out of town jobs and internet sales. I stayed in business....

When I was in a car wreck and could no longer build the billboards, do vehicle wraps and trailer signage, I stumbled on a $50 vintage motorcycle. I purchased it with my last bit of cash, took it home and tore it apart to sell the pieces. Therein lays the beginning of my 'new' business. I made over $2000 on that venture and reinvested it in other vintage bikes, to the point where I could restore them and sell running bikes as well as the parts. This kept us going personally and with my big business....

Now there are four other businesses in our town like my retail business. I still do the bikes, but have delved into making headstone memorial plaques, vintage cycle decals and other more exclusive branches of signage and design to keep the retail business fresh and afloat.

Like I said, it is all about keeping your goals in mind, using the doors that open for you and changing them to benefit you and your path in life. I am very lucky that these doors have been there when I have needed them...and that I have been able to make them adjust to my paths in life. So control...I would say it came after the fact and and was only about 35-40% of the course.
07/30/2013
LoveBug721 LoveBug721
Quote:
Originally posted by Wicked Wahine
I have tried like crazy to control the course my life has taken. I had plans and I've had to change them time and again, but I never expected to have all my planning be for naught. My body and circumstances beyond my control have landed me where ... More
I've controlled about 50%
07/30/2013
Chelynn67 Chelynn67
Quote:
Originally posted by Wicked Wahine
I have tried like crazy to control the course my life has taken. I had plans and I've had to change them time and again, but I never expected to have all my planning be for naught. My body and circumstances beyond my control have landed me where ... More
I've tried, I promise but have learned that I don't have much control.
08/01/2013
Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by Wicked Wahine
And all those helicopter kids are missing out on knowing what that's like! You remind me of my sister in many ways. I mentioned her above to RonLee and she is as you just described yourself, though I haven't heard her actually admit to ever ... More
Hahaha, right? Can't believe I'm just now seeing this.
08/05/2013
Total posts: 15
Unique posters: 10