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Each of us has a different criteria that needs to be met when deciding if we are going to trust someone. For some of us it may be months of association, talking or other means of investing our trust in another. For others, it is a gut instinct,
Each of us has a different criteria that needs to be met when deciding if we are going to trust someone. For some of us it may be months of association, talking or other means of investing our trust in another. For others, it is a gut instinct, feeling of similarity or other instinct.
What are your criteria?
How often is it accurate?
Do you have different levels of trust?
Hmm. I don't know for sure because there are a lot of instances where it just happens (the decision to trust or not to). I don't think it's something I'm always really conscious about as soon as it happens. Lol.
I guess I would say I've been pretty accurate with my intuition on whether or not a person's trustworthy. There have been times where I went ahead and stupidly chose to trust them anyway, even though I had that feeling. You know? I did that quite a few times in the past actually & I'm even more careful after that, so I have learned to listen to that very first instinct and go with it because it's always right. If I get that feeling, I might as well not bother because they are not trust worthy and they always prove it.
However, if I don't "get that feeling" then it seems they're usually fairly trust worthy people, or at least as far as I know.
I really don't know what criteria have to be there or be absent in order for me to make the decision. It just seems more like a feeling for me. It's like hmmm.. could I trust this person with ... & I'll either feel that it's risky or not risky. That, I think is probably a contributing factor in how I make the decision (trust worthy or not).
I think, as far as the criteria they need to posess in order for me to feel I can likely trust them I'd need to feel comfortable being around them in general. If I have any discomfort being around them, I probably won't trust them as much as I am capable of.
I can say one thing for sure, if they have something sneaky about them or they act in a way that really screams sneaky or shady (I am thinking of one particular case) I do question whether or not I should trust them. This doesn't mean I choose not to trust them, because there is a situation where the person definitely has something sneaky or "hidden" about them and for some reason, I still am trusting them very, very much. Perhaps it's just that they don't trust me enough, as much as I trust them.
If someone shares equally intimate details about themselves with me as I have with them, I think I automatically feel a bigger sense of trust between us.
Most of all, I don't know that it's something that I really do consciously when I do decide. I think it's mostly just that feeling. There's a feeling you get, or maybe I'm weird.
Spiced & Gunsmoke: That is really good! Those are great methods there. In fact, my partner does the exact same thing as you, Gunsmoke! It works. & Now that I think about it, you are totally right -- he's never been screwed twice by the same person! That must be a really good way to go about it.